Search This Blog
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query tantrums meltdowns. Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query tantrums meltdowns. Sort by date Show all posts

Reasons for "Rigidity" in Children on the Autism Spectrum

One frequently observed feature of Aspergers (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) is rigidity in thought and behavior. Rigidity seems to pervade so many areas of the lives of children with the disorder. Novel situations often produce anxiety for them. They may be uncomfortable with change in general. 
 
This can result in behavior that may be viewed as oppositional and can lead to emotional meltdowns. This general rigidity is what parents, neighbors, and teachers often label as stubbornness.

Children with AS and HFA may have many fears in addition to those related to unexpected changes in schedules. Large groups of people and complex, open environments like school hallways, cafeterias, playgrounds, or bus stations tend to overwhelm these young people. They may also be overwhelmed by unexpected academic challenge or by having too many things to remember or too many tasks to perform. 
 

They often have limited frustration tolerance and may display tantrums when thwarted. Routines and rules are very important to kids on the autism spectrum in providing a sense of needed order and structure, and hence, predictability about the world.

Another form or rigidity is moralism, a kind of self-righteous and inflexible adherence to nonnegotiable moral principles that is often out of context with practical reality. An example might be a youngster who criticizes a parent who has run a yellow traffic light when the parent is on the way to the emergency room for treatment of a severe cut or burn.

Rigidity is also found in the inflexibility over matters that are of little consequence, such as arguing about whether the route to the emergency room was the quickest when it might be the difference between a few hundred yards by choosing to take one turn over another. In the classroom, this may be found when an AS or HFA student fixates on a perception that a teacher has not enforced a rule consistently. Such fixations on moral correctness can escalate and interfere with availability for instruction.

Reasons for Rigidity—

1. A misunderstanding or misinterpretation of the actions of others.

2. A violation of a rule or ritual – changing something from the way it is supposed to be. Someone is violating a rule and this is unacceptable to the ASor HFA youngster. 

3. Anxiety about a current or upcoming event, no matter how trivial it might appear to you. 

4. Immediate gratification of a need. 

5. Lack of knowledge about how something is done. By not knowing how the world works with regard to specific situations and events, the youth will act inappropriately instead. 

6. Other internal issues, such as sensory, inattention (ADHD), oppositional tendency (ODD), or other psychiatric issues may also be causes of behavior. 

7. The need to avoid or escape from a non-preferred activity, often something difficult or undesirable. Often, if your son/daughter cannot be perfect, he/she does not want to engage in an activity.

8. The need to control a situation. 

9. The need to engage in or continue a preferred activity, usually an obsessive action or fantasy. 

10. Transitioning from one activity to another. This is usually a problem because it may mean ending an activity before he is finished with it.

Many children on the spectrum have a hard time with changes. The reason for this behavior can be caused by anxiety, and this anxiety results in rigidity.

  ==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
 
Here are the reasons AS and HFA kids are so resistant to any kind of change:
  • anxiety about a current or upcoming event (e.g., the start of school)
  • not understanding how the world works
  • not understanding the actions of someone else
  • other issues like Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) or Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)
  • reluctant to participate in an activity the child cannot do perfectly or an activity that is difficult for him.
  • someone changing a circumstance or rule that has been established
  • the need for instant satisfaction, the child may not understand delayed gratification
  • the need to control a situation
  • the need to keep doing the activity that the child likes (obsession or fantasy)
  • transitioning to another activity, this is especially hard if the activity is not finished

The cause of anxiety or rigidity in your child has a lot to do with the fact that he or she does not have the ability to understand the world like we do.

Because of this "neuro-cognitive" disorder, the child:
  • does not “take in” what is going on around him or her her
  • does not know how to “read between the lines”
  • does not understand implied directions
  • does not understand social cues
  • needs explicit instructions
  • will have difficulty understanding rules of society

“Facts” are what kids with AS and HFA learn and feel less anxious about. Since they have a hard time with all the normal rules of society, having “rules” has a calming effect on them. They think, “This is the rule. I can handle it o.k.” Facts also have to be from someone they think is an “expert” in their eyes. Teachers and doctors may have this leverage with them, but moms and dads are, for the most part, not considered “experts.”

Understanding what causes so much anxiety, tantrums, and out of control behavior helps parents to know where their child is coming from, and with that, they will be able to help him or her become a healthy and happy adult.

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
 
 
More articles for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

Click here to read the full article…

---------------------------------------------------------------

Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

Click here for the full article...

--------------------------------------------------------------

Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

Click here to read the full article...

------------------------------------------------------------

Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.

Click here for the full article...
 
------------------------------------------------------------
 
A child with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) can have difficulty in school because, since he fits in so well, many adults may miss the fact that he has a diagnosis. When these children display symptoms of their disorder, they may be seen as defiant or disruptive.

Click here for the full article...
By

Dealing With Meltdowns That Are In Full Swing


"I read your article on preventing meltdowns, but what can be done when a child is already in a meltdown? My autistic son (high functioning) will experience meltdowns that can literally last for an hour or more."

There are a number of ways to handle a meltdown in a child with high-functioning autism once it has started. 

Some simple strategies include the following:

1. You can positively distract the youngster by getting him focused on something else that is an acceptable activity. For example, you might remove the unsafe item and replace with an age-appropriate toy.

2. You can place the youngster in time away. Time away is a quiet place where she goes to calm down, think about what she needs to do, and, with your help, make a plan to change the behavior.

3. When possible, hold the youngster who is out of control and is going to hurt himself or someone else. Let the youngster know that you will let him go as soon as he calms down. Reassure the youngster that everything will be all right, and help him calm down. Parents may need to hug their youngster who is crying, and say they will always love him no matter what, but that the behavior has to change. This reassurance can be comforting for a youngster who may be afraid because he lost control.

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
 
4. Unlike a meltdown, you can ignore a tantrum if it is being thrown to get your attention. Once the youngster calms down, give the attention that is desired.

5. Try to intervene before the youngster is out of control. Get down at her eye level and say, “You are starting to get revved up, slow down.” Now you have several choices of intervention.

6. Think before you act. Count to 10 and then think about the source of the youngster’s frustration, his characteristic temperamental response to stress (e.g., hyperactivity, distractibility, moodiness), and the predictable steps in the escalation of the meltdown.

7. Talk with the youngster after she has calmed down. When she stops crying, talk about the frustration she has experienced. Try to help solve the problem if possible. 

8. For the future, teach her new skills to help avoid meltdowns, such as how to ask for help. Teach her how to try a more successful way of interacting with a peer or sibling, how to express her feelings with words and recognize the feelings of others without hitting and screaming.

9. Remain calm and do not argue with the youngster. Before you manage him, you must manage your own behavior. Spanking or yelling at the youngster will make the meltdown worse.

10. If the youngster has escalated the meltdown to the point where you are not able to intervene in the ways described above, then you may need to direct him to time-away (not to punish, but to remove him from the current environment). If you are in a public place, carry your youngster outside or to the car. Tell him that you will go home unless he calms down. In school, teachers can warn the child up to three times that it is necessary to calm down and give a reminder of the rule. If the youngster refuses to comply, then place him in time-away for no more than 1 minute for each year of age (again, not to punish, but to remove him from the current environment).

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
 
Post-tantrum management:
  • Do not reward the youngster after a meltdown for calming down. Some kids will learn that a meltdown is a good way to get a treat later.
  • Explain to the youngster that there are better ways to get what he or she wants.
  • Never let meltdowns interfere with your otherwise positive relationship with the youngster.
  • Never, under any circumstances, give-in to a temper tantrum (which sometimes looks like a meltdown). That response will only increase the number and frequency of the tantrums. Also, when the youngster on the autism spectrum has become accustomed to successfully manipulating parents with tantrums in the past -- but then doesn't get his way with today's tantrum -- it can often escalate into a meltdown. Now the parent has two distinctly different problems (that may look the same) to address.
  • Teach the youngster that anger is a feeling that we all have and then teach her ways to express anger constructively.

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book


==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
By

Strategies for Transforming ASD Meltdowns into Moments of Connection


Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a multifaceted neurological condition influencing how individuals interpret the world around them and how they engage socially. One of the most challenging aspects for individuals with ASD—and their caregivers—is the occurrence of meltdowns. These outbursts can be triggered by a variety of factors, including sensory overload, frustration due to communication barriers, or unexpected changes in routine. Although distressing for both the individual experiencing the meltdown and those witnessing it, there are ways to transform these difficult moments into opportunities for connection and mutual understanding. The following strategies elaborate on approaches that can help achieve this transformation.


## Understanding Meltdowns: The Why and How


Before adapting response strategies, it’s crucial to understand the nature of meltdowns. Distinct from tantrums—where a child might seek attention or manipulate a situation—meltdowns are often involuntary responses to overwhelming stimuli. They may arise suddenly due to an excess of sensory input, social pressure, or emotional distress. These episodes can include intense crying, shouting, physical aggression, or complete withdrawal, making them challenging for caregivers to manage. Recognizing this distinction allows caregivers to respond with empathy, as meltdowns indicate a loss of control rather than a deliberate act.


Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 


## Proactive Preparation: Laying the Groundwork


### 1. **Identify Triggers through Observation**


A critical first step in addressing meltdowns effectively involves meticulous observation and documentation of potential triggers. Keeping a detailed journal can help caregivers identify patterns: Is the individual more prone to meltdowns in crowded environments, during transitions from one activity to another, or after lengthy periods of social interaction? Once identified, these patterns can be used to create strategies to reduce exposure to specific triggers or to prepare for them with preemptive measures.


### 2. **Create a Personal Safe Space**


Establishing a physical environment where the individual can retreat during moments of distress can provide a valuable outlet for managing overwhelming feelings. This safe space should be thoughtfully designed to promote calmness, featuring items that the individual finds comforting—such as soft toys, weighted blankets, therapeutic putty, or noise-canceling headphones. Incorporating familiar scents or soft lighting can further tailor this space to encourage relaxation. During a meltdown, having this predetermined area to retreat to can provide a sense of security and comfort.


### 3. **Develop Predictable Routines**


Many individuals with ASD thrive on structure. Daily routines can minimize uncertainty that often leads to anxiety. Caregivers can use visual schedules, charts, or apps showcasing daily tasks. A well-structured routine, perhaps even visually represented with images that outline the day’s events, helps the individual know what to expect. Consistency, whether in timings for meals, school, or leisure activities, creates an environment in which the individual can feel more at ease and in control.


## Responsive Strategies: Navigating Meltdown Moments


### 4. **Maintain Composure and Calmness**


In the heat of the moment, the caregiver’s emotional state is critical. Staying composed and exhibiting a calm demeanor can profoundly influence the situation. Employing a soft tone, slow movements, and open body language conveys safety and can effectively de-escalate the intensity of a meltdown. Responding to distress with calmness encourages emotional regulation and can have a calming effect on the individual.


### 5. **Validate and Acknowledge Emotions**


One vital way to connect during a meltdown is to acknowledge what the individual is feeling without judgment. Simple, affirming phrases such as “I can see you’re feeling really upset,” or “It’s okay to feel this way; let’s figure it out together,” can help the individual feel seen and understood. Verbal validation not only affirms their struggles but also fosters emotional trust, indicating that their feelings matter.


### 6. **Employ Visual Support Tools**


Visual aids can be particularly effective during a meltdown by providing tangible references for understanding emotions and the situation. Social stories, which illustrate scenarios and appropriate responses through pictures and simple text, can guide individuals in processing their feelings. For instance, creating a visual flowchart that illustrates steps to calm down can be useful for younger children or those who are non-verbal.


### 7. **Incorporate Breathing Techniques**


Teaching deep-breathing exercises during calm periods can serve as a useful tool during meltdowns. Encourage slow inhalations through the nose, followed by extended exhalations through the mouth. You might integrate a fun visual element, such as blowing bubbles or pretending to inflate a balloon, to make this activity engaging. Practicing this together can help build familiarity, creating a soothing ritual that aids emotional regulation.


### 8. **Offer Appropriate Physical Comfort**


The effectiveness of physical touch can vary greatly among individuals with ASD. It’s important to attune to the individual's preferences; some may find comfort in a gentle hug, while others might feel overwhelmed and prefer more space. To gauge their comfort level, caregivers can ask, “Would you like a hug?” or “Should we sit quietly together?” It’s essential to respect their boundaries and respond accordingly, facilitating a safe environment.


Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 


## Building Skills for Connection Beyond the Meltdown


### 9. **Teach Emotional Regulation and Coping Skills**


When the crisis has passed, caregivers have an opportunity to teach and reinforce emotional regulation skills. This can be done through engaging activities like role-playing or storytelling that explore various emotional scenarios. For instance, you might read a story about characters who express feelings and discuss how they manage them. Such sessions equip individuals with tools to articulate their feelings and respond appropriately when they feel overwhelmed.


### 10. **Engage in Reflective Conversations Post-Meltdown**


Once the individual is calm, initiating a conversation can provide insights into their experience during the meltdown. Ask open-ended questions like, “Can you tell me what was happening when you felt upset?” or “What can we do next time to help you feel better?” These discussions cultivate a sense of ownership over their feelings and empower them to propose solutions, strengthening the bond between caregiver and individual.


### 11. **Incorporate Play-Based Learning Techniques**


Using play as a learning tool can be particularly beneficial. Games that encourage turn-taking, cooperative play, or even movement can provide the context for practicing emotional expression and navigating social interactions. A game about sharing emotions—where each player draws a card with an emotion and acts it out—is a fun way to explore feelings in an enjoyable, low-pressure environment, deepening the connection between caregiver and individual.


### 12. **Utilize Positive Reinforcement**


Recognizing and reinforcing moments when the individual successfully communicates or manages their emotions is crucial for their self-esteem and development. Consider using a reward system—a sticker chart or tokens that they can trade in for a small treat or extra screen time can create a positive association with good behavior. This approach nurtures their confidence and encourages continued progress in managing their emotions.


## Conclusion: From Challenge to Connection


Transforming ASD meltdowns into moments of connection is a multifaceted process that requires patience, sensitivity, and adaptability. By thoughtfully preparing in advance, responding with empathy during a meltdown, and fostering skills for emotional regulation, caregivers can create a nurturing environment that bolsters resilience and deepens relationships. These strategies not only assist in managing difficult moments but also pave the way for profound connections and a better understanding of each other’s experiences, ultimately enriching the caregiver-individual relationship.


Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
By

Dealing with Autistic Kids Who Hate Change

"Any advice for a child (high functioning) who absolutely hates change and will meltdown at the drop of a hat?! Help!!!"

Research suggests that the brains of kids on the autism spectrum are quite inflexible at switching from rest to task, and this inflexibility is correlated with behaviors characteristic of spectrum disorders. This behavioral inflexibility can manifest as restricted interests (e.g., preoccupation with particular activities, objects or sounds). These behaviors impact how a youngster attends to the external world.

Compared to “typical” kids, young people on the autism spectrum show reduced differentiation between brain connectivity during rest and task (called “brain inflexibility”). Also, there is a correlation between the degree of brain inflexibility shown in the fMRI scans and the severity of restrictive and repetitive behaviors in this population.

Symptoms of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity are often difficult to quantify, and yet often introduce some of the most disruptive chronic behaviors (e.g., tantrums, meltdowns) exhibited by children with ASD level 1, or High-Functioning Autism (HFA). These can be manifest by (a) changes to plans that have been previously laid out, (b) difficulties tolerating changes in routine, or (c) minor differences in the environment (e.g., changes in location for certain activities). For some HFA kids, this inflexibility can lead to aggression, or to extremes of frustration and anxiety that impede certain activities.

Parents – and even teachers – may find themselves “walking on eggshells” in an effort to circumvent any extreme reaction from the HFA child. Also, the children themselves may articulate their anxiety over fears that things will not go according to plan, or that they will be forced to make changes that they can’t handle. Sometimes these behaviors are identified as “obsessive-compulsive” because of the child's need for ritualized order or nonfunctional routine. The idea that OCD and these “needs for sameness” could share some biologic features is a popular notion among professionals.


Have your child watch this video -- Moving From One Activity To Another:




Some of the causes of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity in HFA include the following:
  • Behavioral problems: Some HFA children are just naturally more “set in their ways” and prone to tantrums. Also, some have a very low tolerance for frustration.
  • Neurological catalysts: Underlying neurological issues may explain inflexibility.
  • Parenting issues: Inflexibility can also be influenced by well-meaning parents (e.g., parents may be too busy with other things to take time to teach their child how to deal with frustration or agitation). Some parents find it easier to just let some things go, thus allowing their child to have his/her way time and time again (i.e., over-indulgent parenting). Also, some parents simply do not know how to redirect inappropriate behavior or to systematically teach flexibility. 
  • Security-seeking: Children on the autism spectrum often thrive on routine – sometimes to the extreme. Routines help these children feel secure, and they often have meltdowns if they encounter unwanted changes in their routine (e.g., changes in schedules, activities, food, clothing, music, pillows, the arrangement of knick-knacks, etc.). Over-reactions may look like tantrums, or they can mimic panic attacks. 
  • Sensory sensitivities: Finely tuned taste/smell/sound/touch may cause the child to develop an extraordinary attachment to certain things (e.g., food, a particular song, a favorite pair of shoes, etc.). Sensory sensitivities paired with obsessive interest often cause problems when things change unexpectedly.

Some of the signs of inflexibility or behavioral rigidity include the following:
  • repeats same movement constantly (e.g., clapping hands, facial tics, etc.), which is a self-soothing technique
  • is highly obsessed with narrow topics of interest (e.g., numbers, symbols, phone numbers, sports related statistics, train schedules, etc.)
  • has great difficulty in adapting to changes in school (e.g., shifting from the classroom to the playground)
  • experiences meltdowns or tantrums when unwanted changes are introduced at home (e.g., an earlier bedtime)
  • reacts strongly when thinking or seeing that something has changed from its usual pattern or setting (e.g., his or her display of toy dinosaurs on the dresser)
  • has a very strong attachment to certain items (e.g., toys, keys, switches, hair bands, etc.)
  • likes watching objects that are moving (e.g., ceiling fan, wheels of a toy car, etc.) 
  • lines up items in a certain pattern or order (e.g., all the blue crayons must be grouped together)
  • difficulty multitasking due to adhering rigidly to tasks in the order they are given

 ----------


So what can parents do to help their HFA child learn flexibility? 

Below are some simple ideas that will get you started on this journey (hopefully, you will be able to generalize from these ideas, and then create your own based on your child’s unique needs):

1. Alter routines slightly. This helps your HFA child to learn to accept variation in his or her schedule (e.g., you can have your youngster work on his homework BEFORE dinner one day, then AFTER dinner the next day).

2. Give your youngster the “freedom of expression” (e.g., give her the ability to wear the clothes and items of her liking). Allow your child to express herself in the unique being that she is.

3. Illustrate that categories can change. Young people on the spectrum often put something in only one group, and are not be aware that it can also belong with another group (e.g., a yellow plastic bowl can be used for eating cereal in the kitchen, but it can also be put on the dining room table and used to hold candy, or it can be used as a container filled with soil to grow a small plant).

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
 
4. Incorporate role playing and storytelling in everyday activities (e.g., while you are eating animal crackers, have your child pick a particular animal cracker, name that animal, eat the cracker, and then imitate that animal).

5. Maintain a variety of activities in a variety of environments (e.g., go to different public parks, at different times, on different days).

6. Offer a variety of creative avenues. For example, theatre activities (whether in-school or out-of-school) can be encouraged. Many local organizations for the arts can help parents find a place for their youngster in their programs. Even if the child is shy and does not feel comfortable acting in a play, the organization can always provide other services for the stage play (e.g., lighting, decorating, sound, costume, narrating, etc.).

7. Offer your child the ability to help provide the rules and regulations of the household, but also teach that there will be occasions when a particular “rule” can be disregarded temporarily (e.g., “no eating in the family room” may be an ongoing house rule – except when the family gets together to watch a movie and eat popcorn).

8. Prepare an indoor play area in a way that encourages diversity (e.g., play dough, small inexpensive musical instruments, books, blocks, crayons and paper, etc.).

9. Provide multiple opportunities for an assortment of activities outside as well (e.g., sand box, teeter totter, swing set, a fort, tree house, trampoline, etc.). The more “total-body movement” experiences your youngster can have – the better!

10. Teach your child how to review alternative ways of problem-solving by evaluating the problem, thinking of a variety of solutions, and then figuring out which is the best way to execute the solution (e.g., if your child’s friend refuses to share a particular toy, then give 3 or 4 alternative methods to solve this problem and have your youngster execute the one that appears to be the best choice).

While teaching kids the alphabet or how to count may be fairly straightforward, teaching them how to be more flexible in matters is often not as clear-cut. Fostering flexibility in HFA kids often involves a lot of creativity – and even some unconventional tactics – on the parent’s part.

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

 ==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

 ==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism 


BEST COMMENT: This is my daughter but her meltdowns are associated with getting new things and discarding old things. The smaller issues are with hoarding. She keeps kleenex boxes, Pringles can and cake icing containers. She puts them in totes with lids and organizes them in her bedroom. The large stuff she melts down over would be buying a new car, getting new furniture, rearranging or painting a room. Those types of changes will be hours long meltdowns. I would love to know how to teach her that life changes every day with and without her knowledge.
By

How to Prevent Discipline-Related Meltdowns: Tips for Parents of Kids on the Spectrum

“Are there some ways to prevent some of the discipline-related problems encountered with children who have high functioning autism, specifically meltdowns associated with receiving a consequence for misbehavior? I say ‘prevent’ because it seems that once my son knows he is going to be punished, it quickly escalates into meltdown, which by then is much too late to intervene. Is there a way for us to ‘predict’ and thus prevent a potential meltdown?”

Most parents of kids with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's wait until a problem occurs, and then try to deal with it by issuing a consequence. Consequences can be positive (gaining something desirable) or negative (losing something desirable).

Sometimes, consequences are discussed prior to an event, but usually in terms of a motivator: "If you do this, you will gain (or lose) that." Too often, parents use consequences in the middle of a behavior problem (e.g., "If you don't stop that, you’re not going to play your computer game tonight!”). 
 

Statements such as this are made when the behavior is out-of-control. The parent may have given many warnings up to that point - and is now acting out of frustration. But, warnings issued in the heat of the moment rarely lead to positive change in the short or long term.

With children on the autism spectrum, it’s far better to anticipate the occurrence of a behavior - and then plan for it. How? Well, many behavior problems are repetitious, especially in the same situation. Even when they don't occur EVERY time, they may still be frequent enough to make the parent’s “red alert list” (i.e., a list of events that result in problem behaviors that tend to occur frequently).

For example, one mother made note that nearly every time her son was instructed to bathe, he insisted on finishing his video game first (in order to stall). The mounting meltdown had little to do with the video game, rather it was related to avoiding an unwanted task.

A good rule of thumb is if a behavior repeats itself at least 50% of the time, moms and dads need to prepare for it. So, if homework, dinnertime or bedtime have been frequent problems in the past, chances are very good they will continue to be so in the future.

With a “red alert list,” parents can predict the future to a point. They gain the opportunity to forecast what is going to happen in an upcoming situation because of its constant re-occurrence. When parents have a good idea about what is going to happen, they can prepare their youngster for the event prior to its occurrence by discussing what usually occurs and what needs to occur. 
 
==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with HFA and Asperger's

For example, let’s say that “going shopping” is often a problem-time. In this case, the parent can talk with her youngster (prior to the event) about what normally happens, how he acts, how she is going to respond, and how he is going change his behavior based on her response. Then the parent can follow that up with a discussion to see if she can get a firm commitment from her youngster that he is going to follow through with these new behaviors. 

If the child responds in a positive way, the parent has an increased likelihood that things will go better when they go shopping – especially if this preparation step is practiced over and over again through the course of several weeks or months.

If parents happen to miss the opportunity to prevent a problem, there is often a small "window of opportunity" in which they can still salvage the situation. In the example above, suppose the parent forgot to say something prior to going shopping. As the child’s behavior begins to deteriorate, the parent has a very brief period of time (only a minute or two) before she will be in a tricky situation. The parent should seize this opportunity, because it may be the last best one in that specific time and place.

In summary, create a list of events that - at least half the time - result in your child acting-out. Prior to each event, discuss (a) what normally happens, and (b) what you expect the new outcome to be. Then try to get your child's approval on the new outcome. Lastly, practice this sequence until it becomes a habit.


 
 
More articles for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

Click here to read the full article…

---------------------------------------------------------------

Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

Click here for the full article...

--------------------------------------------------------------

Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

Click here to read the full article…

------------------------------------------------------------

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

Click here to read the full article...

------------------------------------------------------------

Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.

Click here for the full article...
 
------------------------------------------------------------
 
A child with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) can have difficulty in school because, since he fits in so well, many adults may miss the fact that he has a diagnosis. When these children display symptoms of their disorder, they may be seen as defiant or disruptive.

Click here for the full article...
By

Preventing Punishment-Related Meltdowns in Kids on the Autism Spectrum

“Are there methods to prevent meltdowns associated with receiving a consequence for misbehavior? When our high functioning (autistic) daughter knows she is going to be punished, it quickly escalates into meltdown, which by then is much too late to intervene.”

Yes, there are some prevention methods (emphasis on “prevent”). The first and most important consideration is to think in terms of “prevention” rather than “intervention.” Once a meltdown is underway, it usually has to run its course (i.e., it's too late to intervene at that point). So, the best approach is to educate yourself on how to put the fires out while they are still small.

Here are some ideas for using prevention strategies to curb punishment-related meltdowns before that start:

1. Both home and in school, develop a daily routine so that your daughter knows what she is doing and when. Posting the schedule and reviewing it when your daughter becomes "stuck" can provide the necessary prompt to move on.

Compliance is not a struggle between you and your daughter, but rather simply a matter of following the schedule. She will view the schedule as a guide. The guide will serve to decrease anxiety, which in turn decreases meltdowns and tantrums.

2. Expectations (e.g., rules, rewards, consequences, etc.) should be visually available. These must be clearly described to your daughter. Also, use charts with stickers or stars to keep track of reward systems. Use the letters of your daughter's name placed on a chart to keep track of consequences. Throughout the day, if letters have been received, they can slowly be erased for positive responding.



This provides a wonderful visual response for appropriate behaviors, and you can deliver this feedback (depending on your daughter's needs) every ten minutes, fifteen minutes . . . two hours – you decide what works best.

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Asperger's and HFA Children

3. Reinforcers will need to be very individualized, because young people on the autism spectrum often do not respond to “typical” reinforcers. Be well aware of what your daughter views as a reward. Incorporating obsessions into a reinforcement system is an appropriate way of offering a strong reinforcer and of also controlling access to an obsession.

Make sure your daughter is aware of how the reward/consequence system works. Natural consequences can also be highly effective and will remove the "giving" or "denying" of the reward from you. Favored activities should follow less favored or challenging activities.

4. The physical environment must be consistent. In all locations, identify consistent areas where specific activities are completed (e.g., that homework is always completed at the desk in her bedroom or at the kitchen table). These areas/activities should also have consistent behavioral expectations, which are explained to your daughter.

Identify clear physical boundaries (e.g., planned seating arrangement in school, a planned play area at home). Also, use consistent materials that are clearly marked and accessible (e.g., toys that are within easy reach and stored in or right by the area they will be used in).

5. Your relationship with your daughter should be consistent in both word and action. She needs to see you as a predictable person who is calm and in control. Being "easy" or giving your daughter a "break" will thwart your effectiveness. Make rules and stick to them. Make requests and follow through. Don't make second requests, and don't plead. Your interactions must be stable, allowing your daughter to anticipate how she will respond.

She must see you as someone who can help her understand the world around her. Be highly organized and pay attention to details as you create a structured environment for your daughter. However, be sure to remain flexible within this structure. In this way, you will provide the structure your daughter needs to learn to be flexible, thus decreasing the possibility of meltdowns and tantrums.


The 3 Phases of a Meltdown in Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:




By

Articles in Alphabetical Order: 2007 - 2009

                                           2007—



                                           2008—



                                           2009—
 
By
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)

Strategies for Transforming ASD Meltdowns into Moments of Connection

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a multifaceted neurological condition influencing how individuals interpret the world around them and how ...