"My Aspergers son will be come an official teenager next week (13th birthday). Any advice on what parents should do differently with an Aspergers teen vs. a child?"
First of all, there's no need to worry. Children with Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) eventually go through adolescence on their way toward becoming strong, focused adults -- regardless of the misinformation you may have been fed. While adolescence is a difficult time for all teens, it can easily be much worse for those dealing with Aspergers. With the right education and support, most Aspergers teens go on to graduate from high school.
Because they tend to be loners and have odd mannerisms, Aspergers teens can be shunned from popular groups of kids -- and can be the focus of teasing. Even so, these teens develop feelings for others they become attracted to, though they can’t always express their feelings correctly. This can lead to frustration and anger in the Aspergers teen who develops his/her first tentative relationships. They are more likely to face rejection from their peers and be left with a low self-esteem as a result.
Often, a teen with Aspergers fares best with one or two close friends with whom they can practice adolescent social skills and "growing up" behaviors. Even one relatively close relationship can make the difference between a depressed, awkward teen -- and one who is beginning to learn valuable social skills with a select few others.
Parents and family may need to help facilitate relationships between their Aspergers teenager and other teens his own age. Offering to have other teens overnight or taking their teen to an activity with one or two other acquaintances can help facilitate closer connections between their child and others his own age.
Having a teen "love experience" is often much more difficult for Aspergers teens. Their tendency to want to be alone comes into conflict with their desire to be close to another person. Psychotherapy and family support can go a long way toward helping a teen with Aspergers get through the difficult adolescent time.
In summary:
- With the right education and support, most Aspergers teens go on to graduate from high school.
- Teens with Aspergers fare best with one or two close friends with whom they can practice adolescent social skills.
- Parents may need to help facilitate relationships between their Aspergers teenager and other teens his own age.
- Psychotherapy and family support can go a long way toward helping a teen with Aspergers get through the difficult adolescent time.
2 comments:
Patience, Patience, Patience, lots of emotional guidance and support.... and did I mention Patience?
Mine turned 13 in Feb. I've found being open and honest and actually randomly discussing HIS asperger's has been a huge help. He's now old (mature?) enough to understand it and apply it to his life so that he's not embarrassed. As teens they are MUCH more aware of their akward social skills and they long to "fit in".
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