How do I help my 12 year old son to come to terms with his diagnosis...

Question

How do I help my 12 year old son to come to terms with his
diagnosis and help him understand that it is not the end of
the world?

Answer

Asperger’s Syndrome is a form of autism; those who have it
experience various symptoms, exhibiting a range of behaviors.
People with Aspergers have a different way of thinking,
concentrating on special interests. Many people with
Aspergers can speak eloquently and have extraordinary
abilities in engineering, computer science, and systematic
thinking, yet have serious difficulties with social
interaction and functioning in the world. However,
Asperger’s is not the end of world; it is treatable. It is
very normal for your son (and you) to react with sadness,
self pity, anger, or depression when you receive the
diagnosis. You are mourning the life you thought you were
going to have. But that does not mean that you won’t have a
good life; it will just be different.

If your son is willing, discuss with him his diagnosis and
your plans to help him. Reassure him that he will do fine.
If he cannot get over his sadness and anger, get him into
counselling. Once properly diagnosed, reassured, and
treated, he will feel much happier and more optimistic.

Start now to educate yourself and your son. There are tons
of books available for adults, children, and teens that
explain Asperger’s and provide information and help. Read a
book and discuss it together. Then, get online and start
researching Asperger’s symptoms and treatments. There is a
wealth of information on this site!

Become involved in the forum on this site. Also find a
support group in your area. Other parents will provide
moral support and comfort. Your son may enjoy talking with
other children with Aspergers online. Be sure to monitor
the sites he visits to make sure they are appropriate for
him.

I want your son to know that having Asperger’s is not the
end of the world. It creates difficulties in the social
sphere, yes. But special interests can lead to career
skills, and, in some cases, to career success. Good social
skills can be learned over time. With reinforcement and
guidance from loving people; progress is possible. With
knowledge and support from parents, teachers, mentors,
medical professionals, and peers, the inner strengths of
these special people shine, adding uniqueness to our world.

The Parenting Aspergers Resource Guide: A Complete
Resource Guide For Parents Who Have Children Diagnosed
With Aspergers Syndrome.