HELP FOR PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH ASPERGER'S & HIGH-FUNCTIONING AUTISM

Education and Counseling for Individuals Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorders

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Where can I get help in dealing with my own feelings and the reactions of others, especially family members?

Question

Where can I get help in dealing with my own feelings and the
reactions of others, especially family members?

Answer

The biggest step a parent has to take after the diagnosis of
Asperger’s Syndrome is acknowledgment and acceptance. As hard
as it sounds right now, you have to accept the diagnosis and move
on.

It helps if your family is supportive and understanding, but
this isn’t always the case. Your child appears normal and
intelligent (which he is) so his behavior draws unwanted
attention and unwarranted remarks from the people you love.
Honestly, sometimes you cannot be sure if his behavior is
deliberate or not. Here are some suggestions on how to deal with
the issues that Asperger’s brings into your life.

Come to terms with the Asperger’s Syndrome diagnosis...

It is what it is. Think of your child’s diagnosis as
information. Your child is the same child he was before the
diagnosis. Now you have an explanation for his weaknesses and
even some of his strengths. Keep a positive attitude by
focusing on the strengths.

Educate yourself and your family about Asperger’s Syndrome...

You must learn all you can about Asperger’s. There are many
books available written by professionals and by parents of
children with Asperger’s. For example, “Embarrassed
Often…Ashamed Never” by Lisa Elliott is an encouraging and
often humorous glimpse into her life as the parent of a child
with Asperger’s Syndrome. This is a great choice for parents
and family members of a child with Asperger’s.

Find local Asperger’s Syndrome support groups...

Connect with local families who have been where you are in the
process. These families know firsthand what it’s like to live
with Asperger’s. It is comforting and powerful to be with
others who are on the same journey. These support groups can
help you find treatment resources in your area, community events
for your family to attend, and more.

Seek individual and family counseling...

Asperger’s brings an added risk of anxiety and depression.
Your child will benefit from counseling. While seeking a
counselor for your child, consider finding a family counselor.
You are all affected emotionally be this diagnosis. Individual
and family therapy can help you work through the rough spots that
will come.

Keep a check on your physical well-being...

Regular medical care is necessary since stress can cause
physical illness. Your well-being is necessary in order to care
for your family. Allow time for yourself and your hobbies. Plan
regular outings and just be a family. Asperger’s shouldn’t
control your life.

Don’t let the cynics get you down. You can’t stop people
from reacting negatively to your child, but you can stop
responding to their negativity. If they miss the joy of knowing
your child, that is their problem.

The Parenting Aspergers Resource Guide: A Complete
Resource Guide For Parents Who Have Children Diagnosed
With Aspergers Syndrome.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ashley Henderson Gonzales
This may not be the proper response. But it would be easier to raise a child with Asperger's in an environment in which people are not only conerned with appearances. A lot of times people move to areas where they hear the schools are great, meighborhoods are safe and they assume that means they are going to be around decent and moral people. In reality, a lot of times the parents and kids are always trying to one up eachother. I do not think that I paid much attention to that until my little one was diagnosed. I would go to parent pick up to pick him up at the end of the day and the moms would stand around in the tennis skirts talking about how perfectly brilliant and talented their kids are. It leaves someone who is not afraid to be imperfect with no one to relate to. For most, at least where I live, being less than perfect is not an option.
13 hours ago · Like · 1 person
Carol Morris I recommend the book, "Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid." Good medicine. And I agree that many people who have never been around quirky kids are extremely uncomfortable with any differences. It's sad. I kind of wanted to send around a Christmas letter saying, "L didn't get nearly as many suspensions this year. And J is much better now that her bipolar meds are stabilized. Hope your year was great too!" :P
8 hours ago · Like · 1 person
Ashley Henderson Gonzales You mean instead of the one about your ski vacay in the Swiss Alps? In which you indlude a photograph of your fam that could be on the cover of a magazine caled "The Perfect Life" I think the honest Christmas letter this year is a great idea! Maybe it would stop us from being tortured with the less than honest ones that we have to suffer through reading!

My child has been rejected by his peers, ridiculed and bullied !!!

Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the Aspergers child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

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How to Prevent Meltdowns in Aspergers Children

Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and the Asperger’s child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

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Parenting Defiant Aspergers Teens

Although Aspergers is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager with Aspergers are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the Aspergers teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

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Aspergers Children “Block-Out” Their Emotions

Parenting children with Aspergers and HFA can be a daunting task. In layman’s terms, Aspergers is a developmental disability that affects the way children develop and understand the world around them, and is directly linked to their senses and sensory processing. This means they often use certain behaviors to block out their emotions or response to pain.

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Older Teens and Young Adult Children With Aspergers Still Living At Home

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with Aspergers face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

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Living with an Aspergers Spouse/Partner

Research reveals that the divorce rate for people with Aspergers is around 80%. Why so high!? The answer may be found in how the symptoms of Aspergers affect intimate relationships. People with Aspergers often find it difficult to understand others and express themselves. They may seem to lose interest in people over time, appear aloof, and are often mistaken as self-centered, vain individuals.

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Online Parent Coaching for Parents of Asperger's Children

If you’re the parent of a child with Aspergers or High-Functioning Autism, you know it can be a struggle from time to time. Your child may be experiencing: obsessive routines; problems coping in social situations; intense tantrums and meltdowns; over-sensitivity to sounds, tastes, smells and sights; preoccupation with one subject of interest; and being overwhelmed by even the smallest of changes.

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Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

Parents, teachers, and the general public have a lot of misconceptions of Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism. Many myths abound, and the lack of knowledge is both disturbing and harmful to kids and teens who struggle with the disorder.

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Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

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to read the full article...

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