Coping with birthday parties and other celebrations

Coping with birthday parties and other celebrations

Exciting times like Halloween, Thanksgiving, Birthdays
and Christmas are all a time to share our joy and
happiness with our families and friends.

We all have fond memories of our own childhood, when we
looked forward to putting up the decorations, eating mouth
watering meals and receiving all those longed for presents,

As parents we naturally want our children to enjoy it all
and have as much fun as we did so we talk, anticipate and
prepare with mounting excitement as the celebrations
draw nearer.

However for those families who are raising a child with
autism it all adds up to an almighty headache!

Children with autism can have a real hard time
coping with all of these celebrations and if they have their
birthday on top of that… well you may as well pack up and
go away until Spring!

Anticipation for a child with autism leads to
increased levels of anxiety which they cannot control.

They become overloaded and then you have a massive meltdown
at the time when you are all supposed to be enjoying and
celebrating the season of peace and goodwill!

The party will be ruined and everybody upset, especially
your child who is trying so hard to fit in and be like
everybody else.

So how can you achieve the impossible and enjoy the season
while at the same time keeping your autistic child calm and
behaving appropriately?

The first simple step to take is to simply reduce the time
talking about the festive occasion.

Remember he /she cannot easily control their emotions and to
chatter constantly about the event will simply lead to stress
and anxiety.

It is useful to enlist the help of others in your home in this
and keep any conversations to a minimum while your autistic
child is around.

Another great strategy to help is to keep any physical changes
to your home to the minimum, so by all means decorate, put up
cards and a tree but just don’t make a big fuss about it all.

A good tip is to not put out any presents until the day they
are to be opened as your autistic child will have a hard time
keeping their hands off and will became anxious and potentially
oppositional.

Although it’s important not to overload your child it is equally
important to explain any changes to their routines.

So prepare your child for any changes by calmly telling them the
day before what will be happening.

Visual supports always work well so use photos or simple pictures
to explain what will be happening.

It is also important to explain to your child what is expected of
them, e.g. to say ‘hello how are you” to guests and sit at the
table to share the meal.

Your child will also need to be given permission to leave the
festivities and you can rehearse this together with some
simple role play.

This is really important as it gives your child an exit strategy
and also allows them to get through the celebrations without going
into meltdown.

Additionally if you see that he/she is becoming distressed
you can also activate the exit cue so your child gets out
before the situation deteriorates.

Following these simple steps should lead to a much more positive
experience for everyone and will provide your autistic child
with the love, support, reassurance and above all confidence to
participate fully in these wonderful occasions.

It is important to visit some sites and see which one/s
you feel comfortable with.

The Parenting Autism Resource Guide: A Complete Resource Guide For Parents Who Have Children Diagnosed With Autism.