HELP FOR PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH ASPERGER'S & HIGH-FUNCTIONING AUTISM

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Helping Aspergers Children To Deal With Stress

"Is it common for a child with Aspergers to quickly and easily get upset about little things throughout the day? The least little thing will set my child off."

Children with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism often suffer from different types of stress compared to other children. Stressors can be as diverse as school issues to the texture of their clothing! These kids often suffer from so many obsessive thoughts that they are stressed out by things such as noise, smell, certain textures, things out of place, and disorder in general.

These children are perceived to be quite intolerant of others as well as the environment. They become very anxious in unstructured settings and in situations where people are moving at random. They may not be able to tolerate people standing close to them. Whether it is sudden or it comes from general background activity, noise can cause acute stress, fear and even panic and, at the very least, the child may be distracted and unable to concentrate.

Each child will have his issues that stress him out. When they are younger, this kind of stress can lead to temper tantrums. Older kids can have anger outbursts or other evidence of distress when things aren’t going their way. They may swear or act-out in inappropriate ways to cope with their environment.

Sometimes a parent or siblings just needs to give in to the idiosyncrasies of the Aspergers child. They may need to keep the noise down or keep things in a specific order. Parents may have to respect their child’s need for certain clothing textures or bed clothing textures.

Lack of sleep can lead to stress in a child with Aspergers. Sleep disorders are very common. Medication or taking naps during the day may help ease the stress of sleep deprivation.

Some stress reduction techniques can be taught and are somewhat different from other stress reducing techniques. The child may need to remove himself physically from the situation causing the anxiety. A quiet environment, free from distractions and where rules are followed rigidly can do much to help the Aspie concentrate.

Carrying a favored object can also give the child a sense of security. The nature of this object can seem quite bizarre to others (e.g., a "cat's eye" marble from the road), but without it, the child may be unable to settle or concentrate. Other kids derive comfort from repeating a set ritual of some kind that can be long and complex. It goes without saying that the ritual, however time-consuming, may have to be carried out in classroom situations, and the comfort object must be allowed to be present if the child is to be able to cope with the stressors.

The Aspergers Comprehensive Handbook

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

You just described my daughter to a tee ! On every single one...

Anonymous said...

How do I reduce the levels of cortisol in my little stressed four year old aspie? It's taking him hours to get to sleep in the evening and of course has moments during the day were he's completely deflated.

Anonymous said...

I have a question! My son has a lot of sensory problems at school. He gets bad migraines there and at home. We found a pair of sunglasses that he wears all the time to help control this. My question is would the school allow him to wear these if it helps control the amount of school he misses due to migraines??

Anonymous said...

Thats my 7 yr old son to a tea!only trouble is he doesnt reach criteria 4 diagnosis were i live despite him havin a half sister with same disorder! Camhs wont help and im at my wits end! Hes not even been to school 4 last 2 months either.

Anonymous said...

He had a scat test and ados assessment 18 months ago and the results proved inconclusive at this time but did suggest hyperkinetic behaviour both in school and at home but im told by camhs he aint got adhd either!

Anonymous said...

My 13 yr old daughter has severe dyslexia and has just had special tinted over lays put into normal frames via the doc referal to a specialist opthomologist at the hosp as she was getting similar probs. Has a special card she carrys now to let teachers kno she needs them if thats any help lemanda!x

Anonymous said...

Are you having problems with your school system with your son? I'm glad that your daughter seems to be getting support from her school! Thats so important for them :)

Anonymous said...

Am i avin problems with his school? Hell yes! Hes way behind his peers, has no friends, only gets 10hrs support a wk and his support i use that term lightly! Shouts at him so much he has refused to go back. At a stale mate at min as school refuse 2 change the support teacher.

Anonymous said...

I know what that is like. I have been fighting my sons school every since he started and he is 11 now. It is so bad that they avoid me as much as possible. I'm so sorry that your family is having to go through that. I'm here, if you ever need to talk.

Anonymous said...

I had to go to the top of the education board for my area to get the help I needed for my 8 yr old son. He's just now been offered a place in a specialist school but I had to fight for it, he can't tolerate school at all! He's been part time for the last six months which has helped his behaviour and his violent out bursts in school (maybe because he's not there much?) Just a shame we all need to fight so hard for the things our kids are entitled to and can't cope without.

Anonymous said...

Since joinin this group ive already found alot of support from various people in similar situations as myself! 4 that i say thanku! On the other hand it also opens my eyes to just how much parents and care givers have to fight for their kids to get what they need! Disgusts me to think how many more kids like my own are bein failed daily.

Anonymous said...

My 7yr old son w/aspergers struggles with failing at things, primarily sports because he has zero athletic ability. In gym the kids are asked to jump rope 15 times to make the "kangaroo club". When my son couldn't even complete ONE, he screamed outloud in gym. Same day he proceeded to lose in a simple classroom game and this was enough to put'him over the edge. On the bus ride home that day, he lashed out at the girl he was seated with and hit her in the face. His explanation "This was the WORST DAY EVER". It brought me to tears because I know how hard it is for him on a daily basis. The school offers absolutely no extra help for my son.

Anonymous said...

We have had success with melatonin and sleepy time tea. We also do yoga or meditation before bed.

Anonymous said...

We've used Neurexan (a homeopathic sleep aid) and are having very good results with this. Also added 1000 I.U. of liquid Vit. D (my son thrashes about while sleeping, and will either launch himself off the bed or headfirst into the wall, and this seems to be helping), and a weighted blanket is making a tremendous difference.

Anonymous said...

Yes all the time. My son gets worked up over the tiniest things and it's so hard trying to offer support when he pushes me away. He gets even more upset if I try console him and I feel pretty useless :-( xxx

Anonymous said...

I guess it is...my 9 year old son is worrying me so with his anger and unlike when he was little he does not want me to say one word to him or console him in anyway :(

Anonymous said...

wow,so accurate.However,some just do not get it.

Anonymous said...

that sounds just like my son. He is also 9. I'm hoping it's a hormonal thing as he hasn't always been this bad xxx

Anonymous said...

Having more than one in the same household can be quite interesting too.

Anonymous said...

Stay calm and rational, be consistent in your response, whatever it is. After 2,153 repetitions (seems like), 11yo will usually respond to a strategy reminder, i.e. "You need to breathe and count to 37 (always an funny #)" or "That's a SMALL thing, dude, regroup." Distract and break that mental lock as early as possible to prevent total meltdown. Good luck!
Yesterday at 1:16pm via mobile · Like

Anonymous said...

My son is now almost 16, he more often than not storms out of his classrooms in a for of anger. When he does stay in class he usually exploded into angry verbal outburts. Often with foul language resulting in detentions/ suspensions. It's important to ensure your children's intsructors will help them develop skill sets needed to cope with neg feelings as well as a supportive environment too.
22 hours ago via mobile · Like

Anonymous said...

yes all 3 of my a/s loved ones react differently to stress,husband only has meltdowns very rarely,less as he gets older,i have learnt to just walk away,if i try to calm him or talk him down,it makes it worse,oldest daughter has serious mental health issues too and in her teens and 20s became very agressive and confrontational,youngest aspergers daughter is very passive and quiet,all so different,

Anonymous said...

all the time. I'm learning how to deal with it better though. Be consistent, be firm.
17 hours ago · Like

Anonymous said...

yes i try to... as much as humanly possible when dealing with ASD use it as a teaching moment. We walk through and role play more appropriate responses to his outburst. It's a long hard road and there are many u turns on it and even dead ends :) Keep your faith my ASD teaches me everyday, and he has a HUGE heart, not sure what life would be like if he weren't ASD

Anonymous said...

Wow- this article sounds like it was written just for my son. It is so helpful to read these articles and learn that what we go thru on a daily basis with him is typical Aspie behavior.

My child has been rejected by his peers, ridiculed and bullied !!!

Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the Aspergers child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

Click here to read the full article…

How to Prevent Meltdowns in Aspergers Children

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Although Aspergers is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager with Aspergers are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the Aspergers teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

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Parenting children with Aspergers and HFA can be a daunting task. In layman’s terms, Aspergers is a developmental disability that affects the way children develop and understand the world around them, and is directly linked to their senses and sensory processing. This means they often use certain behaviors to block out their emotions or response to pain.

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Older Teens and Young Adult Children With Aspergers Still Living At Home

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with Aspergers face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

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Living with an Aspergers Spouse/Partner

Research reveals that the divorce rate for people with Aspergers is around 80%. Why so high!? The answer may be found in how the symptoms of Aspergers affect intimate relationships. People with Aspergers often find it difficult to understand others and express themselves. They may seem to lose interest in people over time, appear aloof, and are often mistaken as self-centered, vain individuals.

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Online Parent Coaching for Parents of Asperger's Children

If you’re the parent of a child with Aspergers or High-Functioning Autism, you know it can be a struggle from time to time. Your child may be experiencing: obsessive routines; problems coping in social situations; intense tantrums and meltdowns; over-sensitivity to sounds, tastes, smells and sights; preoccupation with one subject of interest; and being overwhelmed by even the smallest of changes.

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Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

Parents, teachers, and the general public have a lot of misconceptions of Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism. Many myths abound, and the lack of knowledge is both disturbing and harmful to kids and teens who struggle with the disorder.

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Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

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