My child has been rejected by his peers, ridiculed and bullied !!!
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the Aspergers child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.
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How to Prevent Meltdowns in Aspergers Children
Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and the Asperger’s child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.
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Parenting Defiant Aspergers Teens
Although Aspergers is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager with Aspergers are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the Aspergers teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.
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Older Teens and Young Adult Children With Aspergers Still Living At Home
Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with Aspergers face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."
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Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism
Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.
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Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and HFA
Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.
7 comments:
My son's teacher expressed that when he did < > she felt like it was a "slap in the face" because she had worked so hard.... Well, my son was almost in tears and looked at me and said, I DID NOT SLAP HER IN THE FACE!!! ( my son is 14, btw....)
My Son is very literal also. It's hard at times, but can also be a blessing because most of them don't lie. My Son faces the challenge of perfectionism, especially in written expression. He can't just "beat around the bush" on an essay, it has to be just the facts mam, just the facts.
about an hour ago · Like
My son, my husband, my FIL--all very literal. Used to drive me crazy but now I understand it's a brain difference.
DS is 3.5. He pointed to a truck parked on our street. I told him it was a moving truck and explained that the neighbors were moving and needed to pack up their stuff and drive it to their new house. He disagreed. He pointed to another truck that drove past the house and said 'see that's a moving truck'.
Literal interpretation + misunderstanding conversations =
NT son to me "mom, can I have as snack?"
Me to NT son "have an orange, they're delicious, fresh from Araceli's yard..."
AS son, interrupting, to NT son "did you know they have a chihuahua?"
Me to NT son "I just had one."
...you can see what's coming next....
AS son to me "YOU ATE A CHIHUAHUA?!!!"
God, I love that kid.
As an adult with Aspergers, I have one thing to say: NTs assume they know what's going on with Aspergers children, but they are almost totally wrong. NTs see the world through their social (self-centered) brains and do not understand that we live in a LITERAL universe described by the literal language of mathematics. Literal thinking is a rare talent which ought to be cultivated in Aspergers, not discouraged! NTs have very little understanding of how the world works.
My asperger's daughter lies all the time and thinks nothing of it. If it gets her what she wants or keeps her out of trouble she'll do it. But she will be brutally honest that she is lying and why if asked.
Being social is the opposite of being self centered
Its the ability to understand how other people work. It’s a very important skill - some people are taught this skill and some are born with a natural understanding of social situations. Each type of brain has its own specialty and strengths. But
communication is important. It’s important that people are taught to understand idioms and non literal language. They don’t have to change the way they think, but it’s important to expand their knowledge of how other people function as well.
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