The Telltale Signs of ASD Level 1 [High-Functioning Autism]: A Comprehensive Checklist
Below you will find the majority of symptoms associated with High-Functioning Autism (HFA), also referred to as Asperger’s. The HFA child will not usually have all of these traits. We will look at the following categories: sensory sensitivities, cognitive issues, motor clumsiness, narrow range of interests, insistence on set routines, impairments in language, and difficulty with reciprocal social interactions. Sensory Sensitivity Checklist— 1. Difficulty in visual areas: Avoids eye contact Displays discomfort/anxiety when looking at certain pictures (e.g., the child feels as if the visual experience is closing in on him) Engages in intense staring Stands too close to objects or people 2. Difficulty in auditory areas: Covers ears when certain sounds are made Displays an inability to focus when surrounded by multiple sounds (e.g., shopping mall, airport, party) Displays extreme fear when unexpected noises occur Fearful of the sounds particular objects make ...
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My son was just "officially" diagnosed last week with Aspergers. He has been also diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, depression. He is now 24 and I have know for 22 years that something was out of sorts . Read your articles and pretty much everything applies...I pushed him,nagged him, and now I feel guilty. He was recognized in 6th grade as one of the top 1% of all math students in the country. His grades were declining by 8th grade. I was a Mom that was not going to let her son slip into the cracks of the juvenile justice system. He didn't want to go to college, but I said that was not an option. Took him to 6 colleges and he picked Butler I think bc it was close to home. Now he has graduated with 2 degrees (math and engineering he will finish Dec 2010) and we are having problems launching. He cries and says he doesn't think he can live on his own...yet he did lived in a dorm, and apt, with others but visited weekly.After reading your articles, get why he complained he hated living in the dorm. The last two years he would start to come home more and more. His relationships with girls don't last bc he stalks them at first with much attention, then when they want reciprocity he does not respond. He is fighting the job hunt like crazy. "Interviewing is crazy, why can't I work in flip-flops. His friends have all moved on and he is hinging his whole life on the return of a girl from Italy next week.I now realize why he is so angry with me....I have pushed, nagged, anything to motivate him. I have kicked his butt, felt sorry for him, consoled him, put carrots out ,...anythng I could do.
He just saw the psychiatrist last week. He is not a bad kid. Difficult. He is not truthful or transparent. It ends up feeling manipulative. I AM SCARED, SAD. He is so bright and there is a puppy love side to him that is gentle.But can also feel very vindictive.. Bought your material last night on launching and adult-child. Is the comprehensive book different? Should I purchase it too? Is there a support group for me? Should he go to voc rehab? Easter Seals? His parents are divorced and remarried. He saw a doc from the Riley autism center. Where can he get the social skills training? He has a therapist but today I am going to inquire about type of therapy/approach? My son has refused to see some therapist because he doesn't like the way he looks. HELP HELP HELP. I will do anything to help him. Money is not a problem for us but I know he to find the way to make his own money.
Teresa
He is different than teens w AS in that he has learned to make good friends, seems to pick up on emotions of others, is able to talk about others feelings, has done well his freshman and sophomore year of college. However, there is still a great deal of immaturity related to life's tasks and challenges. In some ways he is more like a 14 yr old than a 20 year old, ie follow through and definitely executive functioning. Some people who don't really understand what he is dealing with (friends) think we should just let him fail--"then he will learn!" However this does not work with him at all--he genuinely works hard but it really is the details of life that trip him up. He also wants to be independent and resents our "help." What I see, both as a parent and clinical social worker is a disability that is part of the fabric of who he is--not just traits. He forgets to apply the things that may have worked and just becomes overwhelmed.
He's about a year from finishing his college degree but was suspended from the University of MN for failing grades just this past semester.
Needless to say...2 steps forward and one step back has been Ben's m.o. since high school graduation.
What is frustrating was all of the supports put in place: he lived at home, had a private coach specializing in Aspergers, had the Disabilities Service support as well as a psychologist for counseling. More supports for academic help were provided.
He chose not to do any of the above and the final results were not only expensive but discouraging.
He is now attempting to get a job. It's not good! His motivation is low and we're at our wits end trying to get him out of the house and on his own.
She barely made it out of high school and has flunked out of two different colleges. One college included a mentoring program and the other was a community college. She has never had a job and up until the last year (after flunking out of the 2nd college) the thought of her having a job was never even considered much less discussed.
I have talked with the RCMP mental health liaison and she is considering intervening because she has learned some of the extenuating circumstances surrounding the doctor's charge. The police didn't come right away because they considered the call from the doctor as not sufficiently dangerous so they picked up our son three weeks later because the doctor had phoned and complained. She told me that the doctor is pursuing a charge because he considers it important to have our son face up to his responsibilities and teach him a lesson.
This doctor has been treating our son with little results for about 4 years. He got Paul as a client because Paul was put in his care by Richmond Mental Health after going into the hospital because he was somewhat delusional. We know Paul is his only Asperger's client and that he sees him once a month for about half an hour. Paul has also seen a caseworker who, as far as we can find out, visits him at his apartment once a week and watches videos with him.
Obviously this is not enough therapy so I am pursuing having Paul seen by a psychotherapist (I have talked to a couple with autism experience) plus asking that his new case worker perhaps accompany him to social experiences such as groups for the disabled in our community or at least get outside with him.
We by no means want Paul to think what he has done is okay, however, our point is that he hasn't really been having therapy by anyone familiar with Asperger's so this is a good time to try to change things. He seems to have picked up the message from the doctors and case workers that, "you have Asperger's, and you get upset because of it." There has been much less emphasis on ways to control his angry outbursts other than to take anxiety and anti-psychotic medications (which the psych doctor prescribes).
Would you recommend that we do what we can to get him more therapy? If so, what should we look for, as autism therapists right in our area that he could easily get to are short around here. Paul has already been switched to another psychiatrist at Richmond Mental Health because the one he had the fight with has, of course, recused himself. We have been told the new psychiatrist is a good one.
Thanks,
Laureen.
The best course of action (which may not be possible) is to have him see a psychotherapist who specializes in adult Aspergers. There are not too many of us, unfortunately.
Aspergers has only been in the radar since 1994 or so ...it's a fairly new disorder.
He does need anger management, but the anger is a symptom of his disorder. Medication helps, but cognitive-behavioral therapy would be MUCH better.
Mark Hutten, M.A.
As part of his high school course work, he was able to start his welding training at our local college as the industry was in desperate need of skilled tradespeople. It was even paid for, provided he finish before he turned 20. He was very close to finishing in time but he was insisting on being very slow and meticulous (despite suggestions from his instructors that he not take so much time on the welds) and did not complete on time. He therefore had to pay for the course after all, but then felt very indignant about it.
He finished his welding level C training 1.5 years ago and ideally would have found a job where he could put in 1000 hours towards his apprenticeship. Unfortunately the economic downturn happened just as he graduated. While jobs then became hard to come by, he didn't even want to look. His teacher thought that Morgan would be good working on planes and helicopters here in town, and offered to teach Morgan just the parts of the next level of welding that would be enough to get him a job there. (They've received some good contracts to build planes.) Because of his Asperger's diagnosis (only a year ago!) and his ADHD, he could get educational funding for this additional training. He, however, is not willing to 'go through all the hoops' in order to get that funding, despite all the help being offered from numerous individuals. Nor is he willing to pay for the training without a guarantee that he could get work. So, here he sits.
He has had a part-time job (19 hours per week) for about 4 years stocking shelves at a nearby grocery store. They won't give him any more hours but he refuses to go to another store in the chain for additional hours - too hard to get to by bus, the parking lot is too big so gathering up the buggies would be a huge pain, etc. etc.... As is typical with AS, he feels comfortable with the familiar (ie: his store) and very resistant to new things. He won't even take a bus that he's never been on before. I have to drive the route, show him where to transfer, and get him to set his watch to beep a few minutes before his stop so he knows when to start watching to get off.
As noted in video addiction information, he has cut himself off from just about everything other than his three 6.5 hour shifts per week job. He has no friends (never has) other than the ones he has met and communicates with online, he takes all his meals (eaten at all hours of the days and night) up to his room to eat, and he has no interest in doing anything with family. He informed me the other day that he only likes to spend time with people of like mind and that, unfortunately, I'm not one of them. (I'm a single parent with my 17-year old daughter being with me one week then her dad's one week.)
We've talked recently and he's admitted to feeling lost and adrift, and 'maybe' wishing he had some friends to do things with. We have an Asperger's Social group here in town but he doesn't want to go. He won't do volunteer work as it doesn't pay, yet he won't apply for other jobs. He won't even go out to a movie with me as he can watch them for free on line.
This is so very stressful for me. It has contributed to my suffering from depression and I've been off work for the past year. My psychiatrist is getting tired of hearing about my frustration around the situation and has suggested I just boot him out and he'll be forced to make it on his own. "Better that just one of you go down (Morgan) than both of you drown."
Thank you again!
I am very interested in purchasing your book "Launching Adult Children With Aspergers". It's about time someone really addressed this subgroup of PDD and specifically, parents dealing with adult "children" with it. My life with my 24 year old son has been a struggle since day one. I knew, long before Asperger's was recognized, that there was something - something similar to traits I saw in "Rainman" - but not that severe.
Do you ever have trainings or conferences? I checked with our local NAMI Clubhouse and they don't really have anything in the way of support other than just general mental health groups for families. I feel that it is extremely important to have a group that focuses specifically on this population.
In many ways, I have been lucky. I worked in the mental health field for 15 years. I suspected the diagnosis as early as 1998 - but didn't get clinical confirmation until 2005 - right at the time my son decided "no more medication, no more therapy, no more doctors." He has co-morbidities of severe ADHD and Impulse Control Disorder. And now, since he stopped taking meds, he is also dual diagnosis since he self medicates with marijuana. I say I'm lucky because I have done extensive research, have had access to specialists who take the time to talk to me at various community meetings I attend, and I've been able to finally convince him that this is something that he has, it's not his fault, and it's nothing to be ashamed of.
If you ever want to present anything here in Allen County, I have many people who would be glad to put together a forum for you to present your material. I am also very interested in participating in any type of trainings/conferences, etc... that you may have in Anderson.
Most Sincerely,
Christine
I really need your help or some advise where I can go for help.
He is in and out of jobs every other week. He is great at getting a job but can't keep it.
I purchased and implemented the out of control teen book 3 years ago and found it to be the best information I have ever received. Now with a diagnosis of ASD and our child now turning 19, we are facing other issues that I am sure your Launching Adults and Older Teens book will address in the same no nonsense and practical way.
Our son has developed OCD in the past 18 months. He is incredibly fearful of diesel amongst other things. He has taken to opening doors at times with his feet! He is a hand washer who has at times washed until they are bleeding. I am not for once suggesting that his issues are not real but wonder how much is attention seeking/avoidance driven. We have seen therapists, psychologists and psychiatrists who all have written him off. They have now decided that an inhouse facility will be the best. The problem is we live 7 hours drive away from the nearest one. I am tired of being told that this is as good as it is going to get and that I just have to face up to reality. It is almost like his case is just too hard. No one can give me answers of what to do when he is bashing down the door and screaming for hours on end or how to make him into a productive member of society. I am hoping your book will help with the melt downs and refusal to do anything at all for himself.
He was just recently diagnosed after having seem many doctors that failed to diagnose him....he does not want to go to therapy again because he says it does not help him help make decisions...which is his main problem...he has always been extremely indecisive, even when he was a small boy....he just does not seem to have a "sense of self" and is easily manipulated by others...he has no sense of direction...he is kind and good and is really a hard worker when he does have a job (however, ever job he has had, I had to get for him....) he refuses to step out and do the hard stuff....he also has had many car accidents and has been totally irresponsible with money.
She was diagnosed with Aspergers at 16, but I feel like we have not been able to find much in the way of support since her diagnosis.
She has had very few meltdowns since her diagnosis, however all attempts to get her to take initiative have failed - except when it came to selecting this particular college.
She was very excited about it until the very last moment. And this past week has been the worst week of our lives! She is constantly calling and begging to come home.
She refuses to go see the counselor. She refuses to use her techniques for calming herself down. There is not reasoning with her at all!
When I talk to her cross country coach - he says she's doing fine. She says she's only acting fine. I honestly don't know what to believe.
She is at college 10 hours away from home.
Can you help us?
Stacy
Having said that...
The only thing that is going to help her at this point is counseling from someone who specializes in Aspergers. She can't have it both ways ..."I want to come home and be void of responsibility -- but I don't want to learn how to be a happy, productive citizen."
One parent in this situation gave her child an ultimatum: either you seek counseling or you stay at school and make it on your own.
Mark
a few seconds ago · Like
I will first give you some background re him and then where my and his lives are today.
Stephen is the second of our four children. He has always been quiet and about age 12 I began stating to teachers and my husband and anyone who would listen, "Something about him isn't right." No one took me seriously. Stephen has never gotten lower than a high A in any class, graduated valedictorian of his h.s. class, received local, state, national and international awards for his science fair work from 7th-11th grades. He never really had friends and teachers always said he would be fine once he started college. His was quiet and focused and teachers liked him generally but he verbally and emotionally abused me at home for years. I was so relieved when he started college at his dream school Cal Tech fall of 2005. After 3 wks. there he started e-mailing me, "I don't belong here. I don't know what I was thinking. If I stay here I will lose my mind." and more. He dropped out and spent the spring semester at home in CT. He then attended Univ. of Conn. from fall of 2006-fall of 2007. He was increasingly more miserable and detached mentally. Fall of 2007 he began not making sense, stating he wanted to end his life and we shouldn't feel bad. I advised him to go for counseling on campus and they directly sent him to a psych ward. They required him to take Lithium before they would discharge him. I think he was in the hospital for about 3-4 days. A neuropsychologist finally diagnosed him with Asperger's syndrome at age 21. He came home and I don't really remember what happened after that. He completed more college at both UConn and Naugatuck CC but dropped out at both after completing enough credits to get a degree but changing majors so often he didn't finish anything. He still has no friends, worked at an organic farm for 2 mos this yr., thought he would join an intentional community in VA and spent 9 days of the 3 wk. visit before calling us to get him. Now he is just depressed as usual, angry in general, doesn't want to go to college, doesn't want to work, states he supports anarchy and always finds a negative reason to not do or try anything we suggest. He won't go for counseling and won't consider medication. He does not drink, smoke or do drugs. He talks about wanting to live in the woods and grow his own food. We do not know how to help him.
I am going to copy this letter to the counseling center so I can get started with my counseling and any feedback you might have will be appreciated. I want to have a life! We are so thankful to be living together again and I love the house and the neighborhood and I want to start a master gardener program in Jan that is finally close enough for me to do. I want to be content and happy.Life is short!
We are currently on state assistance and have a large family of 8, but I will do anything to save my oldest son. My fear is that my rejection (his perception--I call it being safe), will drive him to further psychological problems, perhaps even suicide. His situation financially is so dire, I fear that he will become overwhelmed and shut down.
4 minutes ago · Like
I've tried for years to encourage him to transfer to an inside the store job where he would have health insurance and opportunities for advancement. Seven years ago I even hired a job coach to facilitate things. The coach told me the manager was more than willing, offered all kinds of accommodations etc., and a tryout period in every department to see which was the best fit. He refused. I tried to force him to just try it, but he became teary and told me he couldn't do it. The job coach said it was sad, but maybe he just wasn't ready. I've discussed it with my son over the intervening years and his reaction is still the same, tears included. Socially, he is absolutely clueless. He was diagnosed as learning disabled in kindergarten and attended self contained programs within a regular middle school and high school. I don't think he's ever realized his school experience was different from the rest of the school.
My husband and I try to treat him as an adult. He's required to pay for some of his upkeep- but his salary and tips don't begin to cover everything. Until last month he has refused to learn to drive. Now he says he will try to learn because he likes the new car my husband bought. If my husband offers to take him out to practice, he goes, but has made no other efforts. Recently, he was called for jury duty and attended as required, on his own. These two minor events seem to me like maybe he's matured enough to benefit from another try with a coach.
She has no friends to speak of. Since leaving for college, she has not been in contact with any of her high school friends. She expects her family to be her only connection. I have told her many times that she is expecting more from us than we can give.
Her aspergers is stalling her out on making connections and I do not know how to help her over that huge hump. I no longer know what to do to help her. I just spent a week in Colorado trying to help her find a job. She can turn in the applications, and I've had her email a follow up, but she stops short on making calls and really following up and going after a job. I know she wants one, but can't seem to believe she can get one! She's so afraid they will ask her questions she cannot answer. We've role-played and I've written out scripts and still - she's not going out there and making it happen.
She is currently in Colorado going to college. We live in Iowa. She is not in our home, but is begging to come home. She'll be fine for awhile and then have a meltdown again.
She will be coming home at Christmas, and my biggest fear is that we will not be able to get her on a plane back and I really feel she needs to start taking charge of her life.
I really feel I've tried a lot of options and I'm not finding anyone to talk to. I can't let her come back here and I can't let her be on the streets with no way of supporting herself.
I haven't had a chance to actually download and read your book, but for the first time in a very long time, I have hope that two of my adult children, 29 and 40 may be a little better understood by me if nobody else. My 29 year old duaghter self diagnosed herself, and from there we've finally figured out that what is wrong isn't the result of someone who just doesn't care or isn't paying attention. Why is it so hard for the professional community to understand that sometimes it isn't as simple as just "do better, try harder". I've watched these two wonderful people suffer needlessly because of it.
thank you
Sandra
We live in a very rural state and the nearest college in 25 miles away that I would have to drive her to and from. And she is in no way mature enough to live on campus.Anyone know if colleges have to modify for a special needs person or other options? I don't mind helping her do anything that she can with anything that she wants to do. I guess I just don't know what her options are at this point.Thanks to anyone for your responses. It's wonderful to read other stories and know that others share your struggles even though close to home no one is like my child and sometimes I feel like I am on an Island in the middle of the ocean.I can only imagine how my daughter feels.
is very withdrawn
spends nearly all his time in his room
goes out with friends very occasionally, but does enjoy himself when he does
eats very little
currently at college, but has now stated 4 months on he doesn't like the course he's doing but has no motivation to do anything about it and therefore is putting limited effort into his course
stated he does have an interest but will not discuss further on why he won't/can't persue this
has stated previously that there is no one in the family that he likes (including me) only his grandad
has indicated that there is an issue but refuses to elaborate to me, his grandad or even the suggestion of someone like a counsellor
on occasions he will get extremley angry (usually with his brother) over little things i.e. when can he have the laptop, which has resulted him getting physical with his brother (when I am at work) or damaging property
did not want any christmas presents/money from anyone (although we did give him money and he has accepted this)
will not do any chores
does not accept any form of incentive to do things
I have tried ignoring his behaviour, talking to him, telling him I'll be there to listen when he's ready to talk but nothing seems to work.
When he was at school there were several times when he truanted and this could be the case with college, as I have to leave for work before he needs to leave for college.
He used to be such a happy and socially outgoing child but there has been a deteriation over a number of years, he is quite bright but gave up academically when he was at primary school.
The only thing I can pin point was the death of his other grandad when he was about 7, although they weren't particularly close but because he was the eldest grandchild his grandad would make more fuss of him than his other grandchildren.
I fear he is only going to get worse, he has no interest in anything, does not have any thought for the future and says 'i'm not bothered about anything or anybody'. I can't get through to him.
He has no contact with his dad (we divorced nearly 7 years ago) as they don't get on, his dad used to pick on him and favour his brother and obviously this was very apparent to my older son, ahis younger brother sees him regularly. I also do have no contact with his father due to various issues.
I'm 53 and have been in the IT field for more than 20 years. Currently, I'm unemployed and am trying to run a home-based business. I have access to an exam creator as well as the entire database of questions for the CompTIA A+ and Network+ certifications. One day I started going over the questions, one hundred at a time, and discovered that I could pass the exam without too much trouble. I decided to have my Son go over them with me(this was long before we stumbled onto the school he's attending), and was very surprised as well as proud, that he picked up the knowledge as quickly as he did and it wasn't long before he was able to pass the exams as well. I used to bring him to work with me when I was working for a small computer repair shop where the owner didn't mind him being there one day a week. He's very smart in many ways, but he still has a long way to go before I'll feel comfortable that he'll be ok after I'm gone. That's all I'm interested in. When I die I just want to know that he's going to be OK!
My question is: how can I approach Kevin about Aspergers.? I work at a community college and I picked up a report by a professor about 4 months ago and asked him if he wanted to read it. He raged at me that everybody says he’s a “retard”. He screamed, ”Aspergers means I’m retarded.! I’m just a retard”.
Should I leave him alone and not try again for fear he will explode. He was diagnosed with ADD at 6 yrs old and took Ritalin until he had a psychotic break at 17 yrs old. I thought it was caused by Ritalin but I later found out he was sleep deprived. Just within the last year was I became aware that Kevin may have his behaviors from a brain bleed and seizure at birth ( not expected to live at 24 hours old).
Thank you for emailing the links for my purchases. I'm looking forward to reading the publications & listening to the audio.
My son was finally correctly diagnosed at age nine, when he became suicidal. He has surpassed ALL predictions for his future -- he is now twenty and is attending college. He continues to struggle with some issues, so when I stumbled across your website it gave me hope.
Thank you for what you do.
Ginny