"We are desperately trying to motivate our teenager to graduate from high school. He is a senior who needs 20 more credits to graduate. He has stopped going to school. Any advice? HELP!!!"
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My child has been rejected by his peers, ridiculed and bullied !!!
Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.
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Click here to read the full article…
How to Prevent Meltdowns in Children on the Spectrum
Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.
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Click here for the full article...
Parenting Defiant Teens on the Spectrum
Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.
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Click here to read the full article…
Older Teens and Young Adult Children with ASD Still Living At Home
Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."
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Click here to read the full article…
Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism
Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.
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Click here to read the full article...
Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and HFA
Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.
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14 comments:
Is there a way he can go to an alternative high school to make up some or all the credits? I've seen a lot of students make up most credits then return to the traditional high school to graduate with their class.
My next suggestion would be to work closely with the school couselor and the teachers. Maybe a schedule/teacher changes may be in order. Also make sure he is being providing the emotional and academic supports necessary. Maybe see a mental health professional to see if there are additional supports that your son could benefit from.
See if your area has a computer based credit recovery option......because of being inpatient for two yrs.my now 18 yr old was way behind others......they put him on this program .....he gained 22 credits his freshman yr and now is back on track to graduate with his class.....
It also helped that this program worked at his pace not a teachers.
I took my asperger son out of school at 5th grade. This year would have been his senior year but he is going to get his GED instead. Then going straight into college. He just could not handle school then, with the bullying and all the stuff our aspergers children have to deal with. Most, if not all colleges will take students with the GED. This has worked out great for us. I wish you well.
Home schooling through one of the computer based agencies has helped my friend's 17 year old. Pamela's idea above is also a great idea. I have seen that work well too. Good luck! My Aspie is only 7 but I'm already dreading Middle School and High School.
Is your son able to articulate a reason for not going? Its difficult to know how to motivate w/o knowing the reason to not go...
Another solution is to look into the junior college near you - many HS will offer credit for college courses (sometimes twice the credits!) I had a friend who graduated HS and received his AA in the same week! lol - he may well have been on the spectrum but such levels of success were not considered autism back then.
We did independent studies for a semester. which got us though a rough patch. My daughter would do her work o a computer and spend 1 hour a day at the alternative high school. She did finish at the high school. There was a class she could go to that she could go to just to do her work. That lessened some of her anxiety. Talk to the school Ideally they should help you with options.
Try to work something out with the school, perhaps a more flexible schedule. At the same time, give him a kick in the pants and let him know what is expected. Also, start looking into what he does after high school, getting a certificate of some sort at the community college or whatever. Good luck.
What about the younger kids? I have a 9 year old who is having such a hard time with school. Ive tried different schools, meeting with teachers and nothing works. Any advice?
There are a lot of virtual homeschool programs and some have a correspondance school where you drop them off at the Y or some location for a few hours to do their work. I know many aspies who had to go to "alternative" schools and ended up completing 2 yrs worth of work in 3 months! I have a 7 yr old and we pulled him out of school this year for 2nd grade. IT is going much better. His anxiety levels were through the roof before and now he can actually concentrate and remember stuff. k12 has a free online program but it doesn't start until 3rd grade in Texas. Other states have online kindergarten programs. They send you all the materials and even a laptop to do your work on.
Honestly - online school
There are so many resources now and he could just knock it out.
Message me if you need more info.
I realize this article and many of the comments posted after it cover 99% of the issue pretty well. But I'd just add that in my experience, there's a HUGE difference in the overall environments of high-school and college. Even the seemingly minor things, like college classes often being spaced out more than the back to back (3 minutes to get from class to class) nature of high-school make a difference.
If high-school is so frustrating, a teen really wants to drop out? There may be valid reasons for it. As some people said, a GED is a good alternative here and then give college a shot.
I'm going to start this out just like Tamara did, "honestly~you better start rocking his world if you already haven't. I mean strip his whole world, or else. The "or else" would be, military school, jail, being kicked out, no cell phones, computers. Once you have dropped the bomb on his world, then he can start "earning" things back, slowly. I know it sounds cruel and inhuman, but sometimes that tough love is all you can do. In your case, you have no more time, it's now or never.
Oh, forgot about summer school, need to throw summer school in there. He will probably more than likely, not graduate on time. Sorry to say.
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