Question
My 17-year-old son has just recently been diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome. After several really rough years of being bullied and having difficulty with maintaining friendships, we began to see him drifting towards "the wrong crowd" and using marijuana. At first, we assumed it was an experimental thing, but has since caused him to be arrested for possession. He continued to use despite mandatory drug testing.
The scary thing is that I fear that marijuana has become his new "obsession." He admitted to daily use and has told me on more than one occasion that he has no intentions of stopping. He sees it as a harmless, "natural" substance. Now, it has gotten to the point where I have seen discussions on his facebook that indicate he is involved in dealing, not as a big time dealer, but what looks like someone who delivers to "friends." He flat out denies he is involved in dealing despite my husband and I having read these messages. He even came home recently with a black eye and I fear he was beaten due to a bad deal. We are scared out of our minds and not sure where to go from here.
He wants to go to college, has good grades, but just cannot see the dangerous road he is on, despite many people telling him and the trouble it has already brought to him. We have him in counseling (for the past month or so) and it is clear that he is self-medicating.
Do you have any advice? I don't think a traditional drug treatment program would work with his very rigid way of thinking and I'm afraid this could make matters worse. Thank you - your newsletters have brought a lot of great advice and validation during the process of learning about Aspergers.
Answer
Adolescence is a time that is more emotional for everyone. Yet the hormonal changes coupled with the problems associated with Aspergers can result in the Aspergers teenager becoming emotionally overwhelmed. Childish temper tantrums can reappear. The Aspie teen may act-up by physically attacking a teacher or peer. He may even experience a "meltdown" at home after another day filled with harassment, bullying, pressure to conform, and rejection. Suicide and drug addiction become real concerns, as the Aspergers teenager now has access to cars, drugs and alcohol.
Marijuana is the most widely used illicit drug among America's youth today, and children are smoking it at a younger age than ever before. Moreover, the strength of the drug has increased in the past two decades, and other chemicals are often added to increase its effects. Here are the facts on marijuana:
• A significant body of research has identified the consequences of marijuana use, including changes to the brain, problems with learning, effects on mental health, and lung and respiratory damage. Marijuana leads to changes in the brain similar to those caused by cocaine, heroin and alcohol.
• Adolescents age 12 to 17 who use marijuana weekly are nine times more likely than non-users to experiment with other illegal drugs or alcohol, five times more likely to steal and nearly four times more likely to engage in violence.
• Despite popular belief, scientific research has shown that marijuana use can indeed lead to dependency and addiction.
• For teens, marijuana can lead to increased anxiety, panic attacks, depression and other mental health problems.
• Marijuana affects alertness, concentration, perception, coordination and reaction time.
• Marijuana affects many of the skills required for safe driving and other tasks, and these effects can last up to four hours.
• Marijuana is more potent than ever and can lead to a host of significant physical, social, learning and behavioral problems at crucial times in the lives of teens. 60% of teens currently in drug treatment have a primary marijuana diagnosis. Today's marijuana is more potent and its effects can be more intense.
• Marijuana is the most commonly used illicit drug in the United States. Every day in 1999, more than 3,800 youth ages 12-17 tried marijuana for the first time. That's more than tobacco. The number of eighth graders who have used marijuana doubled between 1991 and 2001, from one in ten to one in five. Young marijuana users often introduce other youth to the drug.
• Regular marijuana users often develop breathing problems, including chronic coughing and wheezing.
• Research has also shown a link between frequent marijuana use and increased violent behavior.
Moms and dads are the most powerful influence on their kids when it comes to drugs. Two-thirds of youth ages 13-17 say losing their parents' respect is one of the main reasons they don't smoke marijuana or use other drugs. Moms and dads who perceive little risk associated with marijuana use have kids with similar beliefs. Often times, parents neglect to refer to marijuana use when talking to their kids about drugs. They are more concerned about so-called "hard" drugs and the dramatic increase in use of club drugs. Many moms and dads do not fully appreciate the specific dangers of marijuana today. In some cases, they draw on their own experiences with drug, 30 years ago when it wasn't nearly as potent.
What can parents do?
Clear communication by moms and dads about the negative physical, emotional, and functional effects of drugs, as well as about their expectations regarding drug use have been found to significantly decrease drug abuse in Aspergers teenagers.
Adequate parental supervision has also been found to be a deterrent to drug use in Aspergers teens. Specifically, parents knowing how, where, and with whom teens socialize, as well as limiting their child's access to substances that can be abused have been associated with less teen drug use.
Limiting the amount of alcohol, cleaning solutions (inhalants), prescription, and over-the-counter medications that are kept in the home to amounts that can be closely monitored and accounted for has also been found to decrease substance abuse by teens.
Family-focused abuse-prevention programs have produced reductions in teen drug abuse. Among ethnic minorities in the United States, those who strongly identify with their communities and cultures have been found to be less likely to experience risk factors for using drugs compared to their peers who are less connected to their communities and cultures. Thus, incorporation of a ‘cultural componen’t to drug abuse prevention programs may enhance the effectiveness of those programs. In addition, teenagers 15 to 16 years old who use religion to cope with stress tend to use drugs significantly less often than their friends who do not use religion to cope.
Drug use has been found to occur most often between the hours of 3 and 6 p.m. – immediately after school and prior to parents coming home from work. The teenager’s participation in extracurricular activities has been revealed as an important technique in preventing drug abuse in this age group.
My Aspergers Teen: Discipline for Defiant Aspergers Teens
29.11.10
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How to Prevent Meltdowns in Aspergers Children
Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and the Asperger’s child are totally exhausted. But...
Don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.
If your child suffers from Asperger’s Syndrome, expect him to experience both minor and major meltdowns over incidents that are part of daily life. He may have a major meltdown over a very small incident, or may experience a minor meltdown over something that is major. There is no way of telling how he is going to react about certain situations. However, there are many ways to help your child learn to control his emotions.
Click here for the full article...
Don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.
If your child suffers from Asperger’s Syndrome, expect him to experience both minor and major meltdowns over incidents that are part of daily life. He may have a major meltdown over a very small incident, or may experience a minor meltdown over something that is major. There is no way of telling how he is going to react about certain situations. However, there are many ways to help your child learn to control his emotions.
Click here for the full article...
Parenting Defiant Aspergers Teens
Although Aspergers is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager with Aspergers are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the Aspergers teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.
The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing a child with a neurological disorder. Violent rages, self-injury, isolation-seeking tendencies and communication problems that arise due to auditory and sensory issues are just some of the behaviors that parents of teens with Aspergers will have to learn to control.
Parents need to come up with a consistent disciplinary plan ahead of time, and then present a united front and continually review their strategies for potential changes and improvements as the Aspergers teen develops and matures.
Click here to read the full article…
The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing a child with a neurological disorder. Violent rages, self-injury, isolation-seeking tendencies and communication problems that arise due to auditory and sensory issues are just some of the behaviors that parents of teens with Aspergers will have to learn to control.
Parents need to come up with a consistent disciplinary plan ahead of time, and then present a united front and continually review their strategies for potential changes and improvements as the Aspergers teen develops and matures.
Click here to read the full article…
Aspergers Children “Block-Out” Their Emotions
Parenting children with Aspergers can be a daunting task. In layman’s terms, Aspergers is a developmental disability that affects the way children develop and understand the world around them, and is directly linked to their senses and sensory processing. This means they often use certain behaviors to block out their emotions or response to pain.
Although they may vary slightly from person to person, children with Aspergers tend to have similar symptoms, the main ones being:
=> A need to know when everything is happening in order not to feel completely overwhelmed
=> A rigid insistence on routine (where any change can cause an emotional and physiological meltdown)
=> Difficulties with social functioning, particularly in the rough and tumble of a school environment
=> Obsessive interests, with a focus on one subject to the exclusion of all others
=> Sensory issues, where they are oversensitive to bright light, loud sounds and unpleasant smells
=> Social isolation and struggles to make friends due to a lack of empathy, and an inability to pick up on or understand social graces and cues (such as stopping talking and allowing others to speak)
Click here to read the full article…
Although they may vary slightly from person to person, children with Aspergers tend to have similar symptoms, the main ones being:
=> A need to know when everything is happening in order not to feel completely overwhelmed
=> A rigid insistence on routine (where any change can cause an emotional and physiological meltdown)
=> Difficulties with social functioning, particularly in the rough and tumble of a school environment
=> Obsessive interests, with a focus on one subject to the exclusion of all others
=> Sensory issues, where they are oversensitive to bright light, loud sounds and unpleasant smells
=> Social isolation and struggles to make friends due to a lack of empathy, and an inability to pick up on or understand social graces and cues (such as stopping talking and allowing others to speak)
Click here to read the full article…
Living with an Aspergers Spouse/Partner
Research reveals that the divorce rate for people with Aspergers is around 80%. Why so high!? The answer may be found in how the symptoms of Aspergers affect intimate relationships.
People with Aspergers often find it difficult to understand others and express themselves. They may seem to lose interest in people over time, appear aloof, and are often mistaken as self-centered, vain individuals.
A person with Aspergers may have trouble understanding the emotions of their partner, and the subtle messages that are sent by facial expression, eye contact and body language are often missed. Because of this, a person with Aspergers might be seen as egotistical, selfish or uncaring.
These are unfair labels, because the affected individuals are neurologically unable to understand other people's emotional states, and they are usually shocked, upset and remorseful when told their actions were hurtful or inappropriate!
Click here to read the full article…
People with Aspergers often find it difficult to understand others and express themselves. They may seem to lose interest in people over time, appear aloof, and are often mistaken as self-centered, vain individuals.
A person with Aspergers may have trouble understanding the emotions of their partner, and the subtle messages that are sent by facial expression, eye contact and body language are often missed. Because of this, a person with Aspergers might be seen as egotistical, selfish or uncaring.
These are unfair labels, because the affected individuals are neurologically unable to understand other people's emotional states, and they are usually shocked, upset and remorseful when told their actions were hurtful or inappropriate!
Click here to read the full article…
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3 comments:
Two things to consider;
1. Recreational Drugs can make an Asperger child feel more "normal" for the same reason that medicinal drugs such as Ritalin work.
The addiction is therefore twofold as the child becomes addicted to "fitting in" (the drugs give them an esteem boost).
2. Under no circumstances can you allow this to become a special interest. It will consume everything and for a very long period. In some ways, the special interest can be worse than addiction.
Be there for your child. Start doing all kinds of other NEW things with him and try to find an alternative special interest before this one takes hold.
I have a son who is almost 14 years old. He has Asperger and mild brain damage from birth. He is very intelligent with testing IQ of 113. Recently we have had some major problems and he has gotten into some legal trouble. He seemed to go downhill fast, there have been some big changes in his life at home (new sibling, parents seperation, biological father coming into his life). Anyway due to the legal issues we had to put im into a residential treatment center for children with autism. He has been there about 4 weeks. They are having a difficult time with him, claim that he has conduct disorder and don't feel that he has Asperger. The frustrating part is that he is a complicated case due to the brain damage and everyone throws their hands up and says they can't help him. I don't know what to do and am scared to death that he is going down a road that he won't recover from. This is just a snapshot of the issues, I am concerned that if this treatment facility says that they can't help, the courts will throw him into the criminal system and he doesn't belong there either.
I have Asperger's and I smoke Cannabis daily. "Cannabis Sativa" (the umbrella classification for everything marijuana) provides different effects depending on the strains genetics. For instance, Cannabis Indica, provides relaxing, pain relieving, anxiety relieving values and narcotic values. Strains of this nature are deemed, "Indica Dominant". These differ from "Sativa Dominant" strains, which produce more mental effects, including the anecdotal "paranoia".
Proper selection of strain (Ask any one who works in the medical marijuana field) depends on the condition being treated.
Cannabis Indica relieve my anxiety that I get from social situation. I have anxiety from social situations because they are very complex and scary to me, and I am often unable to act appropriately. Further, it cures my horrific insomnia (which is also related to the anxiety). Many people with Asperger's experience sleep onset insomnia as a result on not being able to "shut off one's thought process". In other words, they cannot stop thinking about things in order to relax and sleep.
Marijuana also benefits me greatly even when NOT high. Many hours after I smoke marijuana, I still benefit from significantly reduced anxiety.
This reduction in anxiety has VASTLY improved my social life, and in the end INSURMOUNTABLY improved the overall quality of my life.
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