Our Top 10 Facebook Support Groups
Support groups for parents:
==> Parenting Aspergers Children
==> Parenting Children With Level 1 Autism
==> Relationships With Partners On The Autism Spectrum - Community
==> Relationships With Asperger's Spouses/Partners - Public Group
==> Women in Relationships with Asperger's Men - Closed Group
==> Parenting Aspergers Children
==> Parenting Children With Level 1 Autism
Support groups for partners/spouses in relationships affected by Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:
==> Relationship With Asperger's Spouses/Partners - Community==> Relationships With Partners On The Autism Spectrum - Community
==> Relationships With Asperger's Spouses/Partners - Public Group
==> Women in Relationships with Asperger's Men - Closed Group
Support group for adults with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism:
==> Adults with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
==> Adults with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
Why Your Teen with ASD Prefers To Be Alone
==> More parenting strategies for helping teenagers on the autism spectrum with their unique difficulties...
Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism
The Cycle of Anxiety to Inflexibility in Kids on the Autism Spectrum
“My son on the autism spectrum (high functioning) is very stubborn - and is often angry and disobedient. He also has severe anxiety. Is it possible that the anxiety is causing him to act-out in various ways?”
The short answer is “yes.” A common theme exists among children with Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) – specifically, their tendency to exhibit both behavioral and cognitive rigidity (which parents often perceive as stubbornness and disobedience) in response to anxiety. A strong correlation between anxiety and inflexibility is evident both at home and in the school environment.
Anxiety—
A vulnerability to anxiety is an intrinsic feature of Asperger’s and HFA due to (a) specific neurotransmitter system defects, (b) a breakdown in circuitry related to extinguishing fear responses, and (c) a secondary consequence of the child’s inability to make appropriate social judgments.
There are several factors at play that increase the anxiety level of children on the autism spectrum:
- A lack of empathy significantly limits skills for autonomous social problem-solving. For example, if the child is unaware that she hurts her peers’ feeling by being the “class tattletale” when anyone breaks a rule, she is not likely to change that behavior, resulting in being the “class outcast.”
- For the higher functioning youngster on the autism spectrum, there is sufficient grasp of situations to recognize that others “get it” when he does not.
- Limitations in generalizing from one situation to another often contribute to repeating the same social mistakes. For example, the child may have found a way to positively connect with his siblings at home, yet he doesn’t translate that same skill over to connecting with classmates.
- Limitations in the child’s ability to grasp social cues (e.g., body language) creates repeated social errors. For example, he may talk incessantly about a special interest, but due to an inability to read non-verbal cues, he fails to recognize that the listeners have become bored. But, he continues to ramble on about his interest and fails to get his message across because no one is paying attention anymore.
- Social limitations make it difficult for a child with the disorder to develop coping strategies for soothing herself and containing difficult emotions.
- The child on the autism spectrum is often teased and bullied by his peers, yet he has great difficulty mounting an effective socially adaptive response.
The circumstances that raise the anxiety level of children with Asperger’s and HFA often result in their increased need to control people, places, and things. This need for control takes the form of rigidity.
Behavioral and Cognitive Rigidity—
Behavioral rigidity refers to the youngster’s difficulty in maintaining appropriate behavior in new and unfamiliar situations. Cognitive rigidity occurs when the youngster is unable to consider alternatives to the current situation, alternative viewpoints, or innovative solutions to a problem.
Children with rigid thinking tend to view situations in “either-or” terms (e.g., right or wrong, good or bad). They want concrete, black and white answers. The “gray areas” of life are very uncomfortable.
Symptoms of rigidity often introduce some of the most disruptive, chronic behaviors exhibited by children with Asperger’s and HFA. For example, aggression, difficulties tolerating changes in routine, dislike of changes to plans that have been previously laid out, meltdowns, tantrums, frustration, and problems with minor differences in the environment, such as changes in location for certain activities.
Parents often find themselves “walking on eggshells” in an effort to circumvent any extreme reaction from their brittle child. In addition, the child herself may articulate her anxiety over fears that things will not go according to plan, or that she will be forced to make changes that she can’t handle.
Sometimes these behaviors are identified as “obsessive-compulsive” because of the child’s need for ritualized order or non-functional routine. In other words, the child has a strong “need for sameness.”
Sometimes these behaviors are identified as “obsessive-compulsive” because of the child’s need for ritualized order or non-functional routine. In other words, the child has a strong “need for sameness.”
As one can easily imagine, behavioral and cognitive rigidity causes many problems in the Asperger’s or HFA child’s relationships, which usually results in an even higher level of anxiety for him or her. Thus, the cycle continues.
==> Click here for more information on anxiety in children on the autism spectrum…
==> Click here for more information on rigidity…
More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:
==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
The Six "Emotional Types" for Children on the Autism Spectrum
==> Click here for more information on understanding the emotions of kids and teens on the autism spectrum...
More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:
==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
Why Your Child with Aspergers or High-Functioning Autism Can't Sleep
==> More information on sleep issues in kids on the autism spectrum can be found here...
More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:
==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's
==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism
==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism
Modeling Imperfection: One Simple Trick for Building Self-Esteem in Kids on the Autism Spectrum
Young people with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) often lack the necessary skills to perform certain tasks - and may display behaviors that help them avoid or escape such unwanted tasks. For instance:
- The child who is overwhelmed by too many instructions regarding a particular homework assignment may launch into a tantrum and quit. This refusal to complete homework is often viewed as defiance in the eyes of the parent.
- The aurally-sensitive student who has difficulty focusing in class due to noises outside the classroom may have a meltdown (e.g., slamming his book shut and screaming that he doesn’t want to read). This may be viewed as lazy or obstinate behavior by the teacher.
Kids on the autism spectrum often display perplexing and contradictory profiles of behavior and performance. Some perform certain tasks very well, while struggling significantly in other areas. For example, the youngster may be one of the smartest students in the class, but has difficulty behaving appropriately when placed into a reading group with his peers due to social skills deficits.Despite the efforts of parents and educators for the Asperger’s of HFA youngster’s overall success, his frequent failures and subsequent disappointments often result in feeling a sense of helplessness. The child may think he’s “stupid” and believe there is nothing he can do to be accepted by his peers or to be understood by his teachers. Even if such a child is successful at a particular task, he may attribute it to luck rather than hard work and intelligence. This is a sure sign that a self-fulling prophecy is in the making (i.e., because the child strongly believes he cannot succeed in a certain area, he indeed does fail in that area).
==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder
Kids on the autism spectrum often have a few “special interests” or preferred activities in which they excel greatly. But with subject matter of lesser interest, they struggle – especially in the social realm. For example, they may be able to talk in great detail about the dinosaurs that existed in Jurassic period, but have no idea how to start and end a conversation. The HFA youngster’s social skills deficits often result in an emotional pounding that affects her everyday interactions with parents, siblings, educators, classmates, and others in the community.
Having social problems takes a toll on a youngster’s self-esteem. Kids on the spectrum may (a) have difficulty asking for help with peer-related situations, (b) lack the social-emotional skills necessary to handle peer pressure, bullying, and reading social cues, and (c) have difficulty knowing how to interact appropriately with their teacher, classmates, and the opposite gender.
The HFA child’s behavioral problems that often result from poor self-esteem include the following:
Kids on the autism spectrum often have a few “special interests” or preferred activities in which they excel greatly. But with subject matter of lesser interest, they struggle – especially in the social realm. For example, they may be able to talk in great detail about the dinosaurs that existed in Jurassic period, but have no idea how to start and end a conversation. The HFA youngster’s social skills deficits often result in an emotional pounding that affects her everyday interactions with parents, siblings, educators, classmates, and others in the community.
Having social problems takes a toll on a youngster’s self-esteem. Kids on the spectrum may (a) have difficulty asking for help with peer-related situations, (b) lack the social-emotional skills necessary to handle peer pressure, bullying, and reading social cues, and (c) have difficulty knowing how to interact appropriately with their teacher, classmates, and the opposite gender.
The HFA child’s behavioral problems that often result from poor self-esteem include the following:
- Avoiding doing homework assignments
- Blaming the educator for bad grades
- Exhibiting physical ailments (e.g., stomach aches, headaches)
- Exhibiting emotional problems (e.g., anxiety, depression)
- Not wanting to go to school
- Not wanting to show parents homework
- Refusing to talk to parents or teachers about academic problems in order to avoid confrontation
- Refusing to do an in-class assignment or task
- Refusing to follow classroom rules in order to be removed from the classroom and avoid doing work
- Negative self-talk such as, “I’m dumb. I quit. I can’t do it.”
- Saying the work is too difficult
- Skipping class
Social-emotional development is a key aspect of growth for kids on the autism spectrum. Many of these “special needs” children struggle with building self-esteem. Methods to address low self-esteem in the forlorn child will change from day to day, and will vary depending on his or her personality. Clearly, what helps one child to feel more capable and confident may not help another. In any event, there are ways to address this issue.
==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder
Here’s a simple, yet highly effective strategy for improving the self-esteem in HFA children:
Parents and teachers can share stories about their own struggles and mistakes growing up. This will (a) help them to relate to the “special needs” child, and (b) provide strategies that worked versus those that didn’t quite pan out. When caring adults show the child that they can relate to his or her lack of confidence, the child realizes that this problem is universal. He or she doesn’t feel so “all alone” on the matter. Also, showing the child that we, as adults, were able to shed most of our own insecurities and improve self-esteem overtime offers a model for success in this area.
Case in point: One teacher hung two pictures outside of her classroom - her school photo from 5th grade and another from 9th grade. These photos were beyond embarrassing for her, but she wanted to make a point. Her students knew all too well that, because hormones run high and self-esteem runs low, adolescence presents plenty of difficulties. By sharing her own weaknesses, exhibiting authenticity, and discussing her own fluctuations of self-worth, this teacher lead by example and fostered positive self-images in her classroom.
It’s not uncommon for children to expect perfection from their parents and teachers to a certain degree. For example, they may think it’s funny when their father accidentally stumbles while walking through the Mall, or they may be shocked and humored if their teacher miscalculates, misspells, or misinterprets something. While mildly embarrassing to the adults, these rather amusing occurrences are beneficial to building a child’s self-esteem, because he or she realizes that even people who are supposedly perfect are really imperfect.
Take full advantage of your blunders, and know that it models for your child or student that: “It’s O.K. to make mistakes. We all do. And that doesn’t make us less of a person.” When we, as adults, capitalize on these opportunities, we shatter the belief that perfection is the key to high self-esteem. This realization that everyone makes mistakes helps the discouraged child to accept his own missteps.
Another great way to promote healthy self-esteem in kids on the spectrum is to have a conversation that involves discussions about the future. Due to the symptoms of their disorder, these young people often get caught up by problems happening in the here-and-now. They seem to be developmentally prone to “sweat the small stuff.” Thus, an honest discussion about how to look past any current problems and put things into perspective will foster a positive outlook.
If we, as parents and teachers, do not present our true selves, how can we expect a “special needs” child to feel comfortable enough to show her own true colors? In order to promote these themes of self-confidence, integrity, and authenticity, we must truly practice what we preach.
Here’s a simple, yet highly effective strategy for improving the self-esteem in HFA children:
Parents and teachers can share stories about their own struggles and mistakes growing up. This will (a) help them to relate to the “special needs” child, and (b) provide strategies that worked versus those that didn’t quite pan out. When caring adults show the child that they can relate to his or her lack of confidence, the child realizes that this problem is universal. He or she doesn’t feel so “all alone” on the matter. Also, showing the child that we, as adults, were able to shed most of our own insecurities and improve self-esteem overtime offers a model for success in this area.
Case in point: One teacher hung two pictures outside of her classroom - her school photo from 5th grade and another from 9th grade. These photos were beyond embarrassing for her, but she wanted to make a point. Her students knew all too well that, because hormones run high and self-esteem runs low, adolescence presents plenty of difficulties. By sharing her own weaknesses, exhibiting authenticity, and discussing her own fluctuations of self-worth, this teacher lead by example and fostered positive self-images in her classroom.
It’s not uncommon for children to expect perfection from their parents and teachers to a certain degree. For example, they may think it’s funny when their father accidentally stumbles while walking through the Mall, or they may be shocked and humored if their teacher miscalculates, misspells, or misinterprets something. While mildly embarrassing to the adults, these rather amusing occurrences are beneficial to building a child’s self-esteem, because he or she realizes that even people who are supposedly perfect are really imperfect.
Take full advantage of your blunders, and know that it models for your child or student that: “It’s O.K. to make mistakes. We all do. And that doesn’t make us less of a person.” When we, as adults, capitalize on these opportunities, we shatter the belief that perfection is the key to high self-esteem. This realization that everyone makes mistakes helps the discouraged child to accept his own missteps.
Another great way to promote healthy self-esteem in kids on the spectrum is to have a conversation that involves discussions about the future. Due to the symptoms of their disorder, these young people often get caught up by problems happening in the here-and-now. They seem to be developmentally prone to “sweat the small stuff.” Thus, an honest discussion about how to look past any current problems and put things into perspective will foster a positive outlook.
If we, as parents and teachers, do not present our true selves, how can we expect a “special needs” child to feel comfortable enough to show her own true colors? In order to promote these themes of self-confidence, integrity, and authenticity, we must truly practice what we preach.
Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism
==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance
==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder
==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook
==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book
==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Understanding the Role of Risperidone and Aripiprazole in Treating Symptoms of ASD
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a complex neurodevelopmental condition characterized by social communication challenges and restricted, re...
-
Fixated Personality -- The fixated personality type can be characterized by a preoccupation with orderliness, perfectionism, and the n... -
Below you will find the majority of symptoms associated with High-Functioning Autism (HFA), also referred to as Asperger’s. The HFA chil... -
Aspergers (high functioning autism) is a developmental disorder falling within the autistic spectrum affecting two-way social interaction,...