My ASD Child

"Are shutdowns actually avoidance behavior, in other words, the child is simply trying to get out of doing something uncomfortable? And how is it different than a meltdown? I'm not sure exactly where to draw the line between intentional and involuntary acts with my 10 y.o. (high-functioning) son." When it comes to dealing with a child who has High-Functioning Autism (HFA) or Asperger's (AS), there aren't too many differences between meltdowns and shutdowns. Both are extreme reactions to everyday stimuli. Both tend to be the result of long-term unresolved issues rather than the more obvious triggers, and both are almost completely out-of-the-control of the youngster rather than being used as a means to an end (which would be either a tantrum or emotional blackmail). Some kids on the autism spectrum are more prone to meltdowns while others lean more towards the shutdown reaction. It's possible to do both, but this depends greatly on the root cause of the...

"I know parents shouldn't punish a child for having a meltdown, but how do I know when it's a meltdown versus flat out bad attitude?" One of the most important things for parents to realize is that a meltdown is a trait of High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger's. Because meltdowns can often look like tantrums, it's sometimes difficult to know what course of action to take. To make matters worse, a particular behavior may be meltdown-related on one occasion, but a simple tantrum on another occasion (e.g., the child may have a tantrum over a certain food item because it tastes "yucky," yet he or she acts-out in the same way over another food item due to a gustatory (i.e., taste) sensitivity. Children on the autism spectrum can avoid tantrums - but not meltdowns. The best parents can do is try to reduce the damage. Punishing a child for a meltdown is like punishing someone for swearing when they hit their thumb with a hammer. It won't d...

"Mark, You refer to 'meltdowns' quite frequently in your articles. Is it not similar to a tantrum... if not, what can be done to prevent them?" A meltdown is not identical to a tantrum (although there is an overlap on occasion). From a biological standpoint, a meltdown is an emotional outburst wherein the higher brain functions are unable to stop the emotional expression of the lower (i.e., emotional and physical) brain functions.    Kids who have neurological disorders are more prone to meltdowns than others (although anyone experiencing brain damage can suffer from meltdowns too). From a psychological standpoint, there may be several goals to a meltdown, which may or may not be the "rewards" that are consciously desired by the youngster. To many parents and teachers, these goals may seem irrational, inappropriate, and sometimes criminal.    To kids familiar with - or trained to recognize - the psychological causes of such behavior, however, there a...

Your child is majorly upset over something - but is it a meltdown, shutdown, tantrum, or full-blown panic attack? As a parent of a child with High-Functioning Autism (HFA), you know that your child is capable of having a meltdown occasionally. We’ll describe a meltdown as “an over-reaction to environmental stimuli designed to give HFA children a sense of control when they feel that their world is out-of-control.”  Let’s also make the distinction between a meltdown and a temper tantrum. We’ll describe tantrums as “normal acting-out behaviors designed to help children assert their independence as they learn they are separate beings from their parents.” Having defined meltdowns and tantrums, parents need to know that there are times when their “acting-out” HFA children are having neither a meltdown nor a tantrum; rather, they are in the throes of a legitimate panic attack. Let’s describe panic attacks as “periods of intense fear and apprehension that are of sudden onset and...

Helping Parents Understand & Cope with Their Autistic Teenagers (Foundations + a 7-Day Starter Plan you can use tonight) Big Picture: What “autism in adolescence” actually looks like Autistic teenagers often have the same core profile as in childhood—differences in sensory processing, social communication, and cognitive flexibility—but puberty, new academic demands, and social complexity crank the intensity way up. What you see at home (shutdowns, meltdowns, “defiance,” school refusal, hours of gaming, refusal of hygiene, etc.) is often the nervous system saying “I’m overwhelmed,” not “I don’t care.” Key concepts to keep in mind: Nervous-system first, behavior second. Stress, prediction errors, and sensory load drive most “behavioral” moments. Monotropism. Many autistic teens focus deeply on a few interests. That focus is regulating—use it, don’t fight it. Alexithymia & interoceptive differences. Many teens struggle to identify internal states (e.g., “am I a...

Do you need some assistance in parenting your Aspergers or HFA child? Click here to use Mark Hutten, M.A. as your personal parent coach. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After 3 years of frustrating school situations turning into home situations, I find myself at my wits end figuring out where to start. I started researching Asperger's without much direction. We came across a teacher for 2nd grade who used (the symptoms listed) to chastise and leave my son out of so many school activities making them so much harder than necessary and starting our snowball of an utter distaste for school all together (with the help of the principal...who is no longer there). (all the while coupled with enuresis both nocturnal and diurnal) I didn't think it could get worse but 3rd grade led to an even worse year and larger distaste for going to school all together and another teacher who made it her mission to be mean to him and she was not even his classroom teacher. After the horrible ...