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Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder and Coping with "Transitions" at School

"According to the teacher, my child with Autism [level 1] tends to have a difficult time moving from one activity to the next (for example, from writing skills to Math problems to recreation time). Do you have any suggestions as to how his teacher can make these transitions less stressful for him?"

Transitions are very difficult for children with ASD. It is an interruption to their day and a change in their schedule. In order to minimize difficulty in transition, try to keep their schedule as routine as possible (e.g., doing 'writing' exercises first, solving 'Math' problems second, and 'reading' third ...in this order every time). And always let you son know ahead of time that a transition in routine is coming.

Using sensory integration techniques can be very helpful for some autistic children. It is best to have an occupational therapist work with you to first determine if your child is hyper-sensitive or hypo-sensitive. For example, does he crave movement and the feeling of different textures and stimulation, or does he avoid movement and textures.

Here is a summary of a case study:

A young student with ASD level 1 had a great deal of difficulty with the transition from home to school, and with transitions that occurred in his school day. The school created a sensory room that was just his. He craved movement, running and jumping on furniture, loved to feel smooth surfaces, and loved strong odors (in other words, he was hypo-sensitive). 
 
In his sensory room, there was a large hammock for him to lie in that would hold him tight and swing. The ceiling was lined with colored lights. There were boxes with potpourri for him to smell.

He would spend 10 minutes in this room at the beginning of his school day, 10 minutes before lunch, and 10 minutes before returning home. While he was in the room, he was encouraged to take in as much sensory information as he could. 
 
Once he left the room, he was calm and ready to learn. Prior to the intervention of the sensory room, the school was ready to expel him. With the sensory room in place, he became much more compliant, calm, and willing to work with teachers and peers.

This won’t work for every child, but demonstrates how some creative thinking can benefit even the most challenging behaviors. The important thing is to remember what works for your child, and incorporate that into his daily routine. 
 
The scenario above is just one of dozens of examples of accommodations that schools can make if they are willing to put forth a little extra effort.



PARENTS' COMMENTS:
• Anonymous said... a first then card on his desk with Velcro pictures, first is the current task and then is the task they are switching to - not just subjects but include snack, lunch, packing up back pack, etc on pictures, as the current one is finished more the then to first and put the new then on. Does not have to think about the whole day, just what is happening now and what will happen next - then reminders from teacher about how long until next task is great, so something along the lines of 5 more min of math then we will be doing literacy, then again at 2 minutes if 2 reminders not enough, then maybe 3
 • Anonymous said... A part of my daughters IEP is to give warning to finish her thought or assignment to them move to the next and it works most of the time.
 • Anonymous said... A visual timetable and an egg-timer or app with a timer can help.
 • Anonymous said... Could she set a timer for him? These kinds of guidelines for how much longer he has on one activity, before moving to the next has helped my son.
 • Anonymous said... Could they not give him a pictorial timetable so he knows what is happening and what comes next? It's something we used as a matter of course working with children with ASD and something I've used at home with my own son who has Aspies. 
 If not then can they not just give him a warning? So "in 5 minutes we are going to stop doing x and we will start y" ?
 • Anonymous said... Does he have an IEP? Maybe a Para to help him???
 • Anonymous said... Does she give him transistion cues? Does she say "in 5 minutes we will be doing _____" or something to that effect? That would probably go a long way. I know with my daughter (who remains undiagnosed since they changed testing, at least where we live) does much better when given cues
 • Anonymous said... Following. My son also struggles with this.
 • Anonymous said... How about a schedule of Today's Events on the board...depending on his age, he'll be able to look at it during the day and know what's coming next...Lord help the teacher though, if she gets spontaneous and changes things up! Also, a reminder from the teacher that, 'in 5 minutes is recess' could help to give a warning that another activity is coming soon... Hope this helps...it did for us! xxx
 • Anonymous said... I had a visual schedule when they were younger with transition cues. I still have to give my kiddos plenty of transition cues. I start around 10 min, 5 min, 1 min, and then transition.
 • Anonymous said... I Home School my son and it took care of all the problems with school.
 • Anonymous said... In addition to what everyone else said, I got a copy of the daily and weekly schedule and made cards for my son. We sat down the night before and went through what he would have and in what order the next day. After a few weeks, he was comfortable and confident in the schedule and didn't need the cards, though we did pull them out for things like field trips. Now he doesn't use them at all - hasn't all year.
 • Anonymous said... Mine relies on the visual timetable (do NOT forget to have it right!), timers and his amazingly fab teacher has given him his own clipboard that has pictures plus "tick boxes" that he carries around. He loves being given "jobs" to do as well so if the activity is coming to an end they say 5 minutes AND p could you do the checks to see if everyone's ready for ________.
 • Anonymous said... Most teachers are pre deciding that aspergers isn't something that needs special treatment. They are being allowed to shun our kids, they do it with ADHD too. Now the DSM-V is making it worse. They think because aspergers is a social delay and kids can talk, they are typical. If they only knew. Makes me angry.
 • Anonymous said... My oldest has ADHD and Aspergers ... for him over the years (going into 4th grade next school year) he likes to be told ahead a very detailed schedule of his school day or class... what is going to done first, middle, last. He also gets one on one pull out for writing and reading though he has an IEP for ADHD. You could get a 504 plan since Asperger's is back in the DSM Autism spectrum definition again....
 • Anonymous said... My son had his schedule taped to his desk. The teacher would also announce the upcoming change in 3-5 minutes "class we're going to start on xyz in 3". He also had a timer on his desk for the rough days so he could see how much time he had. We even use the timer method for homework.
 • Anonymous said... My son has 5min down time between subjects. This seems to be effective and he transitions better. The problem we have is focusing long enough to do the work.
 • Anonymous said... my son has an aide, and is starting psychological visits this weekend for behavior issues, and focus/changing routine.
 • Anonymous said... My son is at an autism specific school, they have visual schedules and get reminders about when these changes will occur. Much like everyone has mentioned, I have no new suggestions but I can say that this is exactly how the specialist teachers deal with it.
 • Anonymous said... My son school has a set routine for each sessions ie 1st session is English 2nd is writing then break then maths and history then break the afternoon session does change but our teacher ensures my son knows what is happening after break so he is aware. It is the same every day this has helped my son good luck.
 • Anonymous said... My son struggles with this at school everyday. He has a visual timetable broken down for the whole school day. He also has a 5 minute reminder before an activity is about to end. Then a 2 minute one. His favourite subject is maths and hates writing. So getting him to stop maths is tricky but his 1-1 deals with it very well. Lots of reminders and visual aids are great.
 • Anonymous said... My son's teacher tapes a graphic organizer on his desk every day. It allows him to see what's going on for the day and helps with the transition from one activity to the next.
 • Anonymous said... Preparation is definitely key - use a timetable and give warnings or count down to changes, my son is 14 and I still do this now x
 • Anonymous said... Schools, summer camps... they all give my son a notice that they will be moving to another activity or room in a few minutes. Very accommodating to do this for us and him.
 • Anonymous said... She needs to get education on Aspergers first of all. Is she aware of his dx? She needs to do her homework on his needs. Does he have a 504 or iep. They need to be followed. It's up to the school to tweek their style to accommodate him and his needs. Schools are lacking badly in this area. He needs prompting, a written schedule with time coordinates reflecting when each subject starts. She can have a time timer to indicate how long between subjects, and the five minute warning, that's helpful for all kids, not just aspies. Shame on her for being uneducated, assuming she knows his dx. They put this on us to do their work, its better to homeschool, why bother with them. Smh. Sorry, this is a sore subject with me obviously. I'm not asking them to build their day around him, just be aware and make him feel like he's a part of the class, by simple, subtle accommodations.
 • Anonymous said... Sounds like if the parents don't do the leg work, our kids are all struggling. Something is wrong here. And Michelle, yes, that does solve all the school issues, but, why doesn't your son deserve to be with the other children in the school setting because they are too lazy to help him. Schools need to step up and make the necessary accommodations to support our children's learning. They wouldn't get away with it for any other dx in the world. Not one! Our kids are being, " left behind!" Unacceptable!
 • Anonymous said... Teacher needs to start giving advanced warnings about changes. Maybe at 10 , 5, 2, and 1 minute before hand. This way it's less of a shocker at change time.
 • Anonymous said... Teachers need to be better educated in this disability and how to accommodate your child. As parents we have to be diligent and observant on what is hapenning with them and clue teachers on what works. This school year is about over, but I recommend that when the new year begins you speak and email each teacher about your child's disability. I found a great resource online. The PDF package its called " A teacher's guide to Asperger's syndrome". It helps me tremendously to communicate and educate the teachers. You will have to be in constant contact to ensure your child us getting the accommodations he needs as school. Lots of good advice here. Good luck and hope for a better school year.
 • Anonymous said... There is a timer available with three programable lights on it. Makes a nice visual heads up.
 • Anonymous said... These are all great suggestions Visual reminders are great for our son who also has aspergers. So are the count down to switching actitivies 
 • Anonymous said... Use a visual timetable, he can see what is coming next and tick off what has already been done, it breaks the day up into manageable 'bite size' chunks
 • Anonymous said... Visual schedules at school and great for home too!
 • Anonymous said... Warnings a must - Visual if at all possible. Substitutions should be announced at the start of the day, not sprung on the kids at the start of the lesson. Visual progression of the day helps too on the door or desk. Pictures to demonstrate the sequence of event are far more useful to the ASS child than times
 • Anonymous said... you are so right, because you can't see the disability, it's not there. With regard to transition, a 5 minute warning, either verbally or visually has helped my son.

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By

Characteristics of Females with ASD Level 1

"We think our daughter may have a form of autism due to her severe shyness, excessive need to have things just so, certain rituals she has with food, major touch sensitivity, a lot of anxiety, just to name a few. What are some of the signs to look for to help us decide if an assessment is in order?"

Females with ASD, or High-Functioning Autism. often present with a unique set of characteristics that can make diagnosing their disorder very difficult. In addition, their strengths often mask their deficits.

There has been considerable discussion among professionals about the way girls with ASD demonstrate their major characteristics. Some girls have obvious social difficulties, whereas others appear to have excellent skills because they imitate the behaviors of others (often without understanding them).



There are many females who do not receive a diagnosis, possibly because, compared to males, (a) they have fairly good social skills (particularly when interacting with adults in a one-to-one situation), (b) their special interests are different, and (c) their clinical presentation is different.

Sometime during childhood, a female with autistic traits will begin to know she is different compared to her peers. For example:

1. Due to adopting an alternative persona, she may begin to have problems of self-identity and low self-esteem

2. Due to observing and analyzing social behavior and trying not to make a social error, she may become emotionally exhausted

3. During the stress of adolescence, she may develop routines and rituals around food and a special interest in calories and nutrition that develops into the signs of an eating disorder

4. Her interests may be different to her peers in terms of intensity and quality of play

5. She may be an avid observer of human behavior and try to decipher what she is supposed to do or say

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism
 
6. She may be extremely sensitive to the emotional atmosphere at a social gathering

7. She may be like a chameleon, changing persona according to the situation

8. She may be more likely to apologize and appease when making a social error

9. She may be overly well-behaved and compliant at school so as not to be noticed or recognized as a different.

10. She may be vulnerable to “peer predators” who take advantage of her social immaturity

11. She may become increasingly aware of her social confusion and frequent faux pas, and thus prefer to be on the periphery of social situations

12. She may enjoy living in a fantasy world and creating a new persona

13. She may escape into the world of nature, having an intuitive understanding of animals, but not people

14. She may fear that her “true self” must remain secret because she is defective, thus she is almost always acting like someone else

15. She may have a pet that she views as a loyal friend

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

16. She may have a single - but intense – friendship with another female who may provide guidance for her in social situations

17. She may have a strong desire to collect and organize her toys (e.g., dolls) rather than to share her toys with friends

18. She may have an aversion to the traditional concept of femininity

19. She may have an encyclopedic knowledge of specific topics

20. She may have an intense interest in reading and escaping into fiction

21. She may have an interest in ancient civilizations to find an old world in which she would feel at home

22. She may have an interest in other countries (e.g., France) where she would be accepted

23. She may identify with a fictional character (e.g., Harry Potter), who faces adversity but has special powers and friends

24. She may not be interested in the latest craze among her peers to be 'cool' and popular

25. She may not identify with her peers

26. She may not play with her toys in conventional ways

27. She may not want to play cooperatively with her peers

28. She may prefer non-gender specific toys (e.g., Lego)

29. She may prefer to play alone so that she can play her way

30. She may prefer to play with males, whose play is more constructive and adventurous than emotional and conversational

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with ASD

31. She may suffer social confusion in silence and isolation in the classroom or playground, but she may be a different character at home

32. She may talk to imaginary friends, or write fiction at an early age

33. She may think that the way her peers play is stupid and boring

34. She may use imaginary friends that can provide companionship, support and comfort when she feels lonely

35. She may use passive-aggressive behaviors in order to control her family and/or social experiences


  
As young girls, many (but not all) females with ASD:

1. Apologize frequently and want to please others

2. Are an expert on certain topics

3. Are determined

4. Are honest

5. Are involved in social play, but are led by their peers rather than initiating social contact

6. Are kind

7. Are misunderstood by peers

8. Are more able to follow social actions by delayed imitation because they observe other kids and copy them, perhaps masking the symptoms of autism
 
9. Are more aware of - and feel a need to - interact socially

10. Are perfectionists

11. Are so successful at "faking it" that they only come to the attention of a therapist when a secondary mood disorder emerges

12. Are specially gifted in the areas of mathematics and engineering

13. Are very good at art

14. Are visual thinkers

15. Are well-liked by adults

16. Become a target of teasing

17. Do not ‘do social chit chat’ or make ‘meaningless’ comments in order to facilitate social communication

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

18. Enjoy solitude

19. Have a faster rate of learning social skills than males

20. Have a single friend who provides guidance and security for them

21. Have a special interest that is more likely to be unusual in terms of intensity rather than focus

22. Have difficulty knowing what someone else may be thinking or feeling

23. Have difficulty making friends

24. Have difficulty managing feelings

25. Have difficulty showing as much affection as others expect

26. Have difficulty taking advice

27. Have difficulty with writing skills

28. Have extremely detailed imaginary worlds

29. Have imaginary friends

30. Have interests that are very similar to those of neurotypical girls (e.g., animals, dolls, classical literature), and therefore are not seen as unusual

31. Have what is classified as a "male brain"

32. Make reliable and trustworthy friends

33. Mimic or even try to take on all the characteristics of someone they are trying to emulate

34. Notice sounds that others do not hear

35. Read fiction to help them learn about inner thoughts, feelings and motivations

36. Show little interest in fashion

37. Speak their minds (sometimes to the point of being rude)

38. Still need to be directly taught certain social skills

39. Try to understand a situation before they make the first step

40. Use doll play to replay and understand social situations

By

ASD: Tantrums, Rage, and Meltdowns - What Parents Need to Know

Question

My eldest boy J___ who is now 5-years-old was diagnosed with ASD (level 1) last July. We did 6 months of intense therapy with a child psychologist and a speech therapist before we moved over to Ghana. J___ has settled in well. He has adjusted to school very well and the teachers who are also expats from England are also dealing with him extremely well.

My current issue is his anger. At the moment if the situations are not done exactly his way he has a meltdown. Symptoms are: Extreme ear piercing screaming, intense crying, to falling down on the floor saying he is going to die. I have tried to tell him to breathe but his meltdown is so intense that his body just can't listen to words. I then have asked him to go to his room to calm down. He sometimes (very rarely) throws things across the room, but does not physically hurt anyone. As I have two younger boys (ages 1 and 3) I still need to be aware of their safety. I then managed to put J___ in his room with the help of a nanny. He throws all blankets off the bed (which doesn't bother me) and then hides under them. Today I waited 10 minutes then went upstairs to talk to him, but he then started again with the extreme crying and screaming at me. It took him over an hour to calm down fully. The situation arose as the nanny and I were helping him to make muffins and the nanny put a spoonful of the mixture into the muffin tin.

I am requesting your help on ways to calm him down in a manner that is acceptable. He is getting too old to be put in the "thinking corner/naughty corner" and I am a petite person so I'm not going to physically put him there. I am finding his resistance at the moment is a lot with me and his father.

I have structures in place by visual laminated pictures of how the morning is run and the structure before bed. This works fine, but like I said when things aren't done exactly his way, he can have an outburst in a flash. Please give me some strategies on how I can better manage these meltdowns.

FYI - he was diagnosed on the border on the CARS model. I have found a qualified speech therapist who is from England which we go to once a week (but as it is summer break we don't go back to August) to assist with his pragmatic language.


Answer

Problems related to stress and anxiety are common in kids with ASD (high-functioning autism). In fact, this combination has been shown to be one of the most frequently observed comorbid symptoms in these children. They are often triggered by or result directly from environmental stressors, such as:
  • a sense of loss of control
  • an inherent emotional vulnerability
  • difficulty in predicting outcomes
  • having to face challenging social situations with inadequate social awareness
  • misperception of social events
  • rigidity in moral judgment that results from a concrete sense of social justice violations.
  • social problem-solving skills
  • social understanding

The stress experienced by kids with ASD may manifest as withdrawal, reliance on obsessions related to circumscribed interests or unhelpful rumination of thoughts, inattention, and hyperactivity, although it may also trigger aggressive or oppositional defiant behavior, often captured by therapists as tantrums, rage, and “meltdowns”.
 

Educators, therapists, and moms/dads often report that kids on the spectrum exhibit a sudden onset of aggressive or oppositional behavior. This escalating sequence is similar to what has been described in children on the spectrum, and seems to follow a three-stage cycle as described below. Although non-autistic kids may recognize and react to the potential for behavioral outbursts early in the cycle, many kids and teenagers with the disorder often endure the entire cycle, unaware that they are under stress (i.e., they do not perceive themselves as having problems of conduct, aggression, hyperactivity, withdrawal, etc.).

Because of the combination of innate stress and anxiety and the difficulty of kids with ASD to understand how they feel, it is important that those who work and live with them understand the cycle of tantrums, rage, and meltdowns, and the interventions that can be used to promote self-calming, self-management, and self-awareness as a means of preventing or decreasing the severity of behavior problems.

----------


The Cycle of Meltdowns

Meltdowns typically occur in three stages that can be of variable length. These stages are (1) the “acting-in” stage, (2) the “acting-out” stage, and (3) the recuperation stage.

The “Acting-In” Stage

The “acting-in” stage is the initial stage of a tantrum, rage, or meltdown. During this stage, kids and teenagers on the autism spectrum exhibit specific behavior changes that may not seem to be related directly to a meltdown. The behaviors may seem minor. That is, children with ASD may clear their throats, lower their voices, tense their muscles, tap their foot, grimace, or otherwise indicate general discontent. Furthermore, somatic complaints also may occur during the “acting-in” stage. Kids also may engage in behaviors that are more obvious, including emotionally or physically withdrawing, or verbally or physically affecting someone else. For example, the youngster may challenge the classroom structure or authority by attempting to engage in a power struggle.

During this stage, it is imperative that a mother/father or educator intervene without becoming part of a struggle. The following interventions can be effective in stopping the cycle of tantrums, rage, and meltdowns – and they are invaluable in that they can help the youngster regain control with minimal adult support:

1. Intervention #1 involves displaying a chart or visual schedule of expectations and events, which can provide security to kids and teenagers with ASD who typically need predictability. This technique also can be used as advance preparation for a change in routine. Informing kids of schedule changes can prevent anxiety and reduce the likelihood of tantrums, rage, and meltdowns (e.g., the youngster who is signaling frustration by tapping his foot may be directed to his schedule to make him aware that after he completes two more problems he gets to work on a topic of special interest with a peer). While running errands, moms and dads can use support from routine by alerting the youngster in the “acting-in” stage that their next stop will be at a store the youngster enjoys.

2. Intervention #2 involves helping the youngster to focus on something other than the task or activity that seems to be upsetting. One type of redirection that often works well when the source of the behavior is a lack of understanding is telling the youngster that he can “cartoon” the situation to figure out what to do. Sometimes cartooning can be postponed briefly. At other times, the youngster may need to cartoon immediately.

3. Intervention #3 involves making the autistic child’s school environment as stress-free as possible by providing him/her with a “home-base.”. A home-base is a place in the school where the child can “escape.” The home-base should be quiet with few visual or activity distractions, and activities should be selected carefully to ensure that they are calming rather than alerting. In school, resource rooms or counselors' offices can serve as a home-base. The structure of the room supersedes its location. At home, the home-base may be the youngster's room or an isolated area in the house. Regardless of its location, however, it is essential that the home-base is viewed as a positive environment. Home-base is not “timeout” or an escape from classroom tasks or chores. The youngster takes class work to home-base, and at home, chores are completed after a brief respite in the home-base. Home-base may be used at times other than during the “acting-in” stage (e.g., at the beginning of the day, a home base can serve to preview the day's schedule, introduce changes in the typical routine, and ensure that the youngster's materials are organized or prime for specific subjects). At other times, home-base can be used to help the youngster gain control after a meltdown.

4. Intervention #4 involves paying attention to cues from the child. When the youngster with begins to exhibit a precursor behavior (e.g., throat clearing, pacing), the educator uses a nonverbal signal to let the youngster know that she is aware of the situation (e.g., the educator can place herself in a position where eye contact with the youngster can be achieved, or an agreed-upon “secret” signal, such as tapping on a desk, may be used to alert the youngster that he is under stress). A “signal” may be followed by a stress relief strategy (e.g., squeezing a stress ball). In the home or community, moms and dads may develop a signal (i.e., a slight hand movement) that the mother/father uses with their youngster is in the “acting-in” stage. 
 

5. Intervention #5 involves removing a youngster, in a non-punitive fashion, from the environment in which he is experiencing difficulty. At school, the youngster may be sent on an errand. At home, the youngster may be asked to retrieve an object for a mother/father. During this time the youngster has an opportunity to regain a sense of calm. When he returns, the problem has typically diminished in magnitude and the grown-up is on hand for support, if needed.

6. Intervention #6 is a strategy where the educator moves near the youngster who is engaged in the target behavior. Moms/dads and teachers move near the autistic youngster. Often something as simple as standing next to the youngster is calming. This can easily be accomplished without interrupting an ongoing activity (e.g., the educator who circulates through the classroom during a lesson).

7. Intervention #7 is a technique in which the mother/father or educator merely walks with the youngster without talking. Silence on the part of the grown-up is important, because a youngster with ASD in the “acting-in” stage will likely react emotionally to any adult statement, misinterpreting it or rephrasing it beyond recognition. On this walk the youngster can say whatever he wishes without fear of discipline or reprimand. In the meantime, the grown-up should be calm, show as little reaction as possible, and never be confrontational.

8. Intervention #8 is a technique that is effective when the youngster is in the midst of the “acting-in” stage because of a difficult task, and the mother/father or educator thinks that the youngster can complete the activity with support. The mother/father or educator offers a brief acknowledgement that supports the verbalizations of the youngster and helps him complete his task. For instance, when working on a math problem the youngster begins to say, “This is too hard.” Knowing the youngster can complete the problem, the educator refocuses the youngster's attention by saying, “Yes, the problem is difficult. Let's start with number one.” This brief direction and support may prevent the youngster from moving past the “acting-in” stage.

When selecting an intervention during the “acting-in” stage, it is important to know the youngster, as the wrong technique can escalate rather than deescalate a behavior problem. Further, although interventions at this stage do not require extensive time, it is advisable that grown-ups understand the events that precipitate the target behaviors so that they can (1) be ready to intervene early, or (2) teach kids and teenagers strategies to maintain behavior control during these times. Interventions at this stage are merely calming. They do not teach kids to recognize their own frustration or provide a means of handling it. Techniques to accomplish these goals are discussed later.

The “Acting-Out” Stage

If behavior is not diffused during the “acting-in” stage, the youngster or adolescent may move to the “acting-out” stage. At this point, the youngster is dis-inhibited and acts impulsively, emotionally, and sometimes explosively. These behaviors may be externalized (i.e., screaming, biting, hitting, kicking, destroying property, or self-injury) or internalized (i.e., withdrawal). Meltdowns are not purposeful, and once the “acting-out” stage begins, most often it must run its course.

During this stage, emphasis should be placed on youngster, peer, and adult safety, and protection of school, home, or personal property. The best way to cope with a tantrum, rage, or meltdown is to get the youngster to home base. As mentioned, this room is not viewed as a reward or disciplinary room, but is seen as a place where the youngster can regain self-control.

Of importance here is helping the individual with ASD regain control and preserve dignity. To that end, grown-ups should have developed plans for (1) obtaining assistance from educators, such as a crisis educator or principal, (2) removing other kids from the area, or (3) providing therapeutic restraint, if necessary. 

The Recuperation Stage

Following a meltdown, the youngster has contrite feelings and often cannot fully remember what occurred during the “acting-out” stage. Some may become sullen, withdraw, or deny that inappropriate behavior occurred; others are so physically exhausted that they need to sleep.

It is imperative that interventions are implemented at a time when the youngster can accept them and in a manner the youngster can understand and accept. Otherwise, the intervention may simply resume the cycle in a more accelerated pattern, leading more quickly to the “acting-out” stage. During the recuperation stage, kids often are not ready to learn. Thus, it is important that grown-ups work with them to help them once again become a part of the routine. This is often best accomplished by directing the youth to a highly motivating task that can be easily accomplished, such as activity related to a special interest.

Preventing Tantrums, Rage, and Meltdowns

Kids and teenagers with autism spectrum disorder generally do not want to engage in meltdowns. Rather, the “acting-out” cycle is the only way they know of expressing stress, coping with problems, and a host of other emotions to which they see no other solution. Most want to learn methods to manage their behavior, including calming themselves in the face of problems and increasing self-awareness of their emotions. The best intervention for tantrums, rage, and meltdowns is prevention. Prevention occurs best as a multifaceted approach consisting of instruction in (1) strategies that increase social understanding and problem solving, (2) techniques that facilitate self-understanding, and (3) methods of self-calming.
 

Increasing Social Understanding and Problem Solving

Enhancement of social understanding includes providing direct assistance. Although instructional strategies are beneficial, it is almost impossible to teach all the social skills that are needed in day-to-day life. Instead, these skills often are taught in an interpretive manner after the youngster has engaged in an unsuccessful or otherwise problematic encounter. Interpretation skills are used in recognition that, no matter how well developed the skills of a person with ASD, situations will arise that he or she does not understand. As a result, someone in the person's environment must serve as a social management interpreter.

The following interpretative strategies can help turn seemingly random actions into meaningful interactions for young people on the spectrum:

1. Analyzing a social skills problem is a good interpretative strategy. Following a social error, the youngster who committed the error works with an adult to (1) identify the error, (2) determine who was harmed by the error, (3) decide how to correct the error, and (4) develop a plan to prevent the error from occurring again. A social skills analysis is not “punishment.” Rather, it is a supportive and constructive problem-solving strategy. The analyzing process is particularly effective in enabling the youngster to see the cause/effect relationship between her social behavior and the reactions of others in her environment. The success of the strategy lies in its structure of practice, immediate feedback, and positive reinforcement. Every grown-up with whom the youngster with ASD has regular contact, such as moms and dads, educators, and therapists, should know how to do social skills analysis fostering skill acquisition and generalization. Originally designed to be verbally based, the strategy has been modified to include a visual format to enhance child learning.

2. Visual symbols such as “cartooning” have been found to enhance the processing abilities of persons in the autism spectrum, to enhance their understanding of the environment, and to reduce tantrums, rage, and meltdowns. One type of visual support is cartooning. Used as a generic term, this technique has been implemented by speech and language pathologists for many years to enhance understanding in their clients. Cartoon figures play an integral role in several intervention techniques: pragmaticism, mind-reading, and comic strip conversations. Cartooning techniques, such as comic strip conversations, allow the youngster to analyze and understand the range of messages and meanings that are a natural part of conversation and play. Many kids with ASD are confused and upset by teasing or sarcasm. The speech and thought bubble as well as choice of colors can illustrate the hidden messages.

Conclusion—

Although many kids and teenagers on the spectrum exhibit anxiety that may lead to challenging behaviors, stress and subsequent behaviors should be viewed as an integral part of the disorder. As such, it is important to understand the cycle of behaviors to prevent seemingly minor events from escalating. Although understanding the cycle of tantrums, rage, and meltdowns is important, behavior changes will not occur unless the function of the behavior is understood and the youngster is provided instruction and support in using (1) strategies that increase social understanding and problem solving, (2) techniques that facilitate self-understanding, and (3) methods of self-calming.

Children experiencing stress may react by having a tantrum, rage, or meltdown. Behaviors do not occur in isolation or randomly; they are associated most often with a reason or cause. The youngster who engages in an inappropriate behavior is attempting to communicate. Before selecting an intervention to be used during the “acting-out” cycle or to prevent the cycle from occurring, it is important to understand the function or role the target behavior plays.

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

 ==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

 ==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

 ==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism


References—

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SUPER Important Tips for Parents of Children on the Autism Spectrum

Understanding the implication of ASD (high-functioning autism) can bring a greater level of tolerance and acceptance for those with the condition.  
 
Here are some traits and behavior patterns commonly seen in ASD:

• A youngster can be helped if parents consistently work with him and highlight his strengths and work consistently on his weaknesses.

• ASD is often detected when a youngster starts preschool. He will generally interact better with his teacher than his peers and may display silly, loud, aggressive or socially withdrawn behavior.

• Kids on the autism spectrum express their feelings in unpredictable ways. Sometimes they may seem emotionless and other times they may display extreme emotion that is not appropriate to the situation.

• Kids with ASD prefer routine and structure and can become irritable and distressed if the unexpected happens.

• Eye contact is not understood or made use of.
 

• Gross and fine motor skills are often underdeveloped, causing problems in sports and balance.

• Intense preoccupations often center on certain toys or areas of interest. Common obsessions are dinosaurs and forms of transport and how they work.

• Interrupting conversations is a common problem as the youngster does not understand the social signals that allow conversation to move from one to another.

• It is possible to teach social skills but it is a long slow process and often requires parental intervention to repair social damage when they act inappropriately.

• Many kids are perfectionists and struggle if they fail to produce perfect schoolwork. Encourage them to move on, and create distractions if necessary to get them to continue working.

• Most children with the disorder are of average or above average intelligence.

• Older kids may enjoy a club that is focused on their interest – for example, coin or stamp collecting.

• On a positive note, this aversion to rule-breaking means the youngster is less likely to experiment with smoking, drinking, drugs, and sex as he matures.

• Rules are very important and a youngster may become angry if a game is not played fairly or his peers break school rules.

• Short stories can be useful in teaching social skills. Use one page visual aids that teach about listening to others and keeping quiet and still while they talk.

• The youngster may appear cold and uncaring but it is not deliberate. He does not think about others and cannot understand the social graces that keep society functioning.

• They find it hard to generalize. If taught that they shouldn’t hit a youngster at school, they do not automatically make the connection that they shouldn’t hit a youngster in the mall.

• They have excellent thinking skills where things are concerned but are extremely poor at interpreting human relationships.

• They will often seek out other people to talk to about their interests. The conversation is usually one-sided – more like a lecture where they talk about their knowledge and aren't interested in feedback.
 

• Things are interpreted very literally, meaning that sarcasm, playful teasing and figures of speech are not understood.

There is hope for kids who have autism, and with training and support from their family and health professionals, they can live meaningful, productive lives. 
 
 

 
 
Here are some important parenting tips to implement ASAP:

1. Although it is not the youngster’s fault, he will still ultimately be the one to take the consequences of his behavior. It will help your youngster if you can explain the consequences clearly and logically when your youngster is able to listen.

2. Celebrate your child’s humor, creativity, and passion.

3. Do you want to understand the child`s actions? Just ask yourself: What behavior would make sense if you only had 4 seconds to live?

4. Don’t argue; nag; or attempt unsolicited and spontaneous transplants of your wisdom to your youngster. Instead, either a) decide that the issue is aggravating but not significant enough to warrant intervention; or b) make an appointment with your youngster to discuss the issue.

5. Especially with teens, negotiate, negotiate, and negotiate. Parents need to model negotiation, not inflexibility. Don’t worry about losing control: the parent always gets to decide when negotiation is over and which compromise is accepted. Remember: negative behaviors usually occur because the child is spinning out of control, not because he is evil. While evil behavior would need to be aggressively squelched, the much more common overwhelmed behavior needs to be calmly defused.

6. Forgive your youngster and yourself nightly. You didn’t ask to live with the effects of ASD any more than did your youngster.

7. Head off big fights before they begin. Seek to diffuse, not to inflame. When tempers flare, allow everyone to cool off. Serious discussion can only occur during times of composure.

8. If it is working, keep doing it. If not, do something else.

9. If your youngster has a meltdown, the most important thing to remember when dealing with these situations is to try to figure out what caused them. Your youngster is not doing this to intentionally annoy you; he is doing it because he has reached his limit of tolerance in whatever he is dealing with. If you feel his meltdown was caused by a change in routine, reassure him of the routine for the rest of the day and that the routine will not change the next day, if that is the case.

10. Imagine your youngster delivering your eulogy. What do you want him to say about you? Keep those bigger goals in mind as you choose your interactions/reactions to your youngster.

11. Instead of punishing wrong behavior, set a reward for the correct behavior you would rather replace it with. Rewards should be immediate, frequent, powerful, clearly defined, and consistent. Also remember that a behavior always gets stronger before it changes.

12. Keep a sense of humor. Seek to enjoy – not to scream.

13. Pick your fights. Is the issue at hand worth chipping away at your relationship with your youngster? Can your youngster really control the offending behavior at this moment?

14. Plan ahead. Give warnings before transitions. Discuss in advance what is expected, and what the results might be. Have the youngster repeat out loud the terms he just agreed to.

15. Recognize that attention issues in the youngster are only the tip of the iceberg that the whole family must address.

16. Remember that a youngster on the spectrum is still a youngster with thoughts and feelings, and that you are the adult this youngster looks to for support and guidance.

17. Remember that these young people have two time frames: Now, and Huh. There is no future. There is only now. The past is non-negotiable.
 

18. Review this text, and others, periodically. You are going to forget this stuff, and different principles will likely be needed at different stages.

19. The kids who need love the most will always ask for it in the most unloving ways.

20. The most important thing is to be consistent. Kids with ASD thrive on routine. Everything needs to be done at the same time, in the same way, every day, as much as possible, to give the youngster a sense of safety and security. When there will be a change in your youngster's routine, tell them as far in advance and explain what will happen. When you talk to your child, you should use a calm and even tone of voice, and use explicit language that says exactly what you mean. Do not make requests too complicated or ask a youngster to do things with too many steps at once. Try to keep your language as literal as possible. Try to be very verbal. If your youngster does something right, praise them for it.

21. The patient in ASD is the whole family.

22. This is hard work. It is also hard work for your youngster.

23. This is not a contest with your youngster. The winner is not the one with more points. The winner is the one whose youngster still loves them when they graduate from high school.
 

24. You do not have a standard youngster. You can view the issue as a disability. Or, you can view it as wonderful uniqueness. Or, you can view it as both. This "disability outlook" will help because it eliminates blame; sets reasonable expectations thereby minimizing anger; and points the way for parents/teachers to see themselves as "therapists" not victims.

25. You will make it through this; you have no choice.

Kids on the spectrum are for the most part bright, happy and loving kids. If we can help break through to their 'own little world' we can help them to cope a little better in society. They have a need to finish tasks they have started. Strategies can be developed to reduce the stress they experience at such times. Warnings that an activity is to finish in x minutes can help with older kids. With younger kids attempts to 'save' the task help - videoing a program, mark in a book, etc.

As the kids mature some problems will get easier, but like all other kids new problems will emerge. Some teenagers can feel the lack of friendships difficult to cope with as they try hard to make friends in their own way but find it hard to keep them. This is not always the case. Many have friends who act as 'buddies' for long periods of time. Social skills will have to be taught in an effort for them to find a place in the world ... so take all opportunities to explain situations time and time again ..... and one day.......it may work!
 

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 
By

Articles in Alphabetical Order: 2021

 Articles in Alphabetical Order: 2021

 

o   A Message to Older Teens and Young Adults with ASD

o   Articles in Alphabetical Order: 2020

o   ASD [Level 1]: 15 Simple Strategies for Parents of...

o   Autism Spectrum Disorder and ADHD

o   Can my son with ASD truly understand love?

o   Children on the Autism Spectrum and Behavioral Pro...

o   Educating Students with ASD [Level 1]: Comprehensi...

o   Employment Support for Employees with Autism Level 1

o   How Anxiety May Affect Your Autistic Child in Adul...

o   How the Traits of ASD May Affect Relationships in ...

o   How to Avoid "Negative Reinforcement": Tips for Pa...

o   How to Create a Sensory Safe Haven for Your Child

o   How to Diffuse Meltdowns in a Child on the Autism ...

o   How to Help Your Adult Child to Find Employment

o   How to Teach Organizational Skills to Kids on the ...

o   Is ASD Just a Different Way of Thinking?

o   Issues that Females on the Autism Spectrum May Exp...

o   Kids with Autism Spectrum Disorder and the Associa...

o   Learning to Parent a Child with a Diagnosis of Au...

o   Low Self-Esteem and "Sensitivities to Criticism" i...

o   Message to Teens on the Autism Spectrum: What Are ...

o   Message to Teens on the Spectrum: What Does Your N...

o   Mind-Blindness and Alexithymia in Children and Tee...

o   Motivating Teenagers on the Autism Spectrum

o   Nonverbal Learning Disorder versus Autism Spectrum...

o   Parenting Out-of-Control Teens with ASD Level 1 [H...

o   Parenting Tips for Moms and Dads on the Autism Spe...

o   Parent's Concrete Plan to Avert Meltdowns in Kids ...

o   Parents’ Management of Temper Tantrums in Children...

o   Problems with "Sensory Overload" in Children on th...

o   Putting a Positive Spin on Your Negativity: Tips f...

o   Resolving School Behavior Problems in Kids on the ...

o   Rituals and Obsessions in Children with ASD [Level 1]

o   School Refusal in Children with ASD

o   Should You "Push" Your Adult Child with ASD to Be ...

o   Sleep Problems in Teens on the Autism Spectrum

o   Teenage Son with ASD has Stopped Going to School

o   The "Suicide Threat" in Teenagers with Autism Spec...

o   The Difference Between Autism Spectrum Disorder an...

o   The schools do not understand the characteristics...

o   Tics in Teenagers on the Autism Spectrum

o   Videos for Parents Who Have ASD: Help for Marital ...

o   What Your Child on the Autism Spectrum May Experie...

o   When Your Child with ASD Does Not "Bond" Well with...

o   Why Your Teenager with ASD Can Be Moody and Depressed

o   Your Child on the Autism Spectrum has Many Strengt...

o   Your Child on the Autism Spectrum May Be a Logical...

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