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Revealing Your Child's Diagnosis To Extended Family

"How should we go about telling my parents (and other family members) that our son has been diagnosed with autism (high-functioning)? They have always thought his behavior was odd. We believe strongly they should know so they can help to one degree or another with his special needs."

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More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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3 comments:

Parenting Aspergers Children - Support Group said...

Abby Hartwig Jakowski About 6 months after our dx, I wrote a big long email about our "autism journey" and sent it out to everyone. That way they could digest it as they needed to and I could manage questions as I needed to. I thought it was important to tell them all as there are still many cousins of mine who have yet to have kids and maybe my letter can help them watch for warning signs and make informed decisions.
3 hours ago · Like · 2 people

Carrie Arick I never got the chance to share. I told one person and that and they told everyone else before we got home from the doctor's appointment. Wish I could have had more time to process it as a family before it was shared with the entire world.
3 hours ago · Like

Carrie Arick ‎*that PERSON
3 hours ago · Like

Alice Cranford We shared the information with grandparents and our closest siblings in depth. Everyone else it has just kind of been on a as it comes up kind of conversation. We focus more on the positives of our Aspie (exceptional memory skills etc.) then explain his quirks (poor social skills, hypersensitivities etc.) it seems to help them appreciate our unique little guy more.
3 hours ago · Like · 3 people

Monica D'Agostino Seidel AC: YES! That's what we do, and that's how we live.
2 hours ago · Like

Kim Cohen I wrote a semi-long letter to close friends and family about what was going on; I needed the support and love. Most importantly, I no longer wanted people to misunderstand what my son does or what it means when he does certain things. I took a similar approach of giving the strength alongside the challenge. I think our close friends and family definitely have far more information because they are just closer to us. Likely, this year it will probably make it in some form in our family holiday newsletter for some of the same reasons that AJ noted, not to mention, I know a lot of family members have kids with other LDs, so I want them to know they are not alone too!
2 hours ago · Like · 1 person

Anonymous said...

I agree that it is delicate, especially when it is a familial condition (you know, great-grandpa got an engineering degree from MIT, etc., etc.) It's not as if you can suggest to someone that they have it too, or at least noticeable Aspie traits! My dear MIL loves our Aspie, but it's not like we can point out its genetic legacy to her, as she shares some of the same traits. Please, everyone contemplating pregnancy, do your research on prenatal vitamin D (why do younger siblings have a greater chance of having autism? Hmmm.....) and take enough!

Anonymous said...

My sons behavior has effected the entire family but whats worse is when relatives just don't listen and only see him as a naughty little boy-there reactions often ignite the situation and so I tend to stay away in case he has a wobbly.

My child has been rejected by his peers, ridiculed and bullied !!!

Social rejection has devastating effects in many areas of functioning. Because the ASD child tends to internalize how others treat him, rejection damages self-esteem and often causes anxiety and depression. As the child feels worse about himself and becomes more anxious and depressed – he performs worse, socially and intellectually.

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How to Prevent Meltdowns in Children on the Spectrum

Meltdowns are not a pretty sight. They are somewhat like overblown temper tantrums, but unlike tantrums, meltdowns can last anywhere from ten minutes to over an hour. When it starts, the Asperger's or HFA child is totally out-of-control. When it ends, both you and your child are totally exhausted. But... don’t breathe a sigh of relief yet. At the least provocation, for the remainder of that day -- and sometimes into the next - the meltdown can return in full force.

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Parenting Defiant Teens on the Spectrum

Although Aspergers [high-functioning autism] is at the milder end of the autism spectrum, the challenges parents face when disciplining a teenager on the spectrum are more difficult than they would be with an average teen. Complicated by defiant behavior, the teen is at risk for even greater difficulties on multiple levels – unless the parents’ disciplinary techniques are tailored to their child's special needs.

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Older Teens and Young Adult Children with ASD Still Living At Home

Your older teenager or young “adult child” isn’t sure what to do, and he is asking you for money every few days. How do you cut the purse strings and teach him to be independent? Parents of teens with ASD face many problems that other parents do not. Time is running out for teaching their adolescent how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, "There's so little time, yet so much left to do."

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Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

Two traits often found in kids with High-Functioning Autism are “mind-blindness” (i.e., the inability to predict the beliefs and intentions of others) and “alexithymia” (i.e., the inability to identify and interpret emotional signals in others). These two traits reduce the youngster’s ability to empathize with peers. As a result, he or she may be perceived by adults and other children as selfish, insensitive and uncaring.

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to read the full article...

Highly Effective Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children with Asperger's and HFA

Become an expert in helping your child cope with his or her “out-of-control” emotions, inability to make and keep friends, stress, anger, thinking errors, and resistance to change.

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