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Aspergers Children and Sibling Aggression

"My son is an 8 yr old fraternal twin. He was diagnosed with ADHD and generalized anxiety disorder in the summer of 2016 and was diagnosed with autism (high functioning) in the summer of 2018. He is the oldest of 5 boys ranging from 8 to 14 months. My question is: How do I keep him from physically attacking the baby when he gets frustrated? This has only been happening physically since September of last year, but verbally has always said he hates the baby, wants the baby to die, etc. since he was born. I know it has to do with him feeling he's not getting the attention he wants, but with 5 kids, the youngest being of an age that is very demanding, I don't always get to focus on the 8-yrear-old as much as he would like."

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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

He needs to go to a therapist ASAP... He needs to learn how to deal with his anger and you need to learn how to deal with him when he says and does things....

Anonymous said...

He does need counseling but this doesn't fix it. My son who has aspergers,ocd,odd,cd,adhd and panic disorder and does those exact things we go to a counseler once a week and pyschitrist once a month and he is on a cocktail medication and we still have especially when his routine changes. This will never be a cut and dry fix unfortunately. Just remember to give him his time and let him know that you love him regardless of what he says or does. sometimes I when my 8 yr old is in a rage I grab him and hug him an keep telling him that u love him and he eventually calmer and starts crying and apologizes. Look at him next time you will notice his eyes are different he's basically not himself... Love him to pieces that's what I do.....

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Anonymous said...

Oh HELP! My 12 year old Aspie son is really getting to be too much sometimes. He is constantly at war with his 3 year old brother. He has zero patience for him. Yells and carries on that he's in his room and touching his stuff. Another problem is that wallpaper in his room was peeling and my Aspie continually peels it off, and chips away at the cracked dry wall underneath. Now he has a gaping hole in his wall. I have told him constantly to stop doing this but he doesn't. I'm getting frustrated. Yoga for relaxation? massage what to do for his high stress at times?

Mary said...

These comments of course have great advice, but they kind of ignore the fact that there are other siblings besides the two- the Asperger boy even has a twin. When getting your children off to school in the morning, even with only two children, "special time," is not really an option when the child would rather stay in bed and has fits, as my Aspie girl does. But if you have three other children at the same time, and imagine the hubby has to work out of town a lot...well, it's not all so easily remedied, sadly. Nevertheless, there's soon really good advice in here anyway!

Mary said...

I like a lot of this advice, but I'm not sure how realistic some of it is for the person asking the question, as it pertains only to two siblings, not the four or five this person has. I imagine it's much harder to find alone time with any of them with all of the laundry, getting them off to school, food preparation, etc. I feel for the writer of this, as sometimes there isn't just an easy answer for the particular problems of Asperger. Nevertheless, there's good advice here!

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