My ASD Child

“Any advice for helping my child (high functioning) to manage frustration over seemingly small things? Even something as minor as losing a game of checkers turns into a major riot, which in turn aggravates me to no end.” Young people with ASD level 1, or High Functioning Autism (HFA), are easily frustrated. Living in the "typical" world can be confusing, and they need to have someone there to translate and explain every day events to them. All kids get frustrated, and all kids need to learn to manage those frustrations. As a parent, your challenge is to communicate effectively and to try not to get frustrated yourself. Here's how: 1. When something irritates you, tell your HFA youngster what you are feeling so he can learn to recognize emotions in others and label them in himself. Then talk (out loud) yourself through the frustration so that your youngster can hear your “positive spin” on the situation  (e.g., “This is really not a big deal” … “I need to calm do

"I need some ideas on how to build some confidence in one of my students who has been diagnosed with autism recently (high functioning). Now that he knows he has this condition, his self esteem has taken a turn for the worse. He won't even hand-in assignments because he's sure (in his mind) he will get an 'F' (which he does for not handing it in), which just reinforces his negative view of himself." If you have a youngster with Asperger’s (AS) or High-Functioning Autism (HFA), you’ve likely experienced some aggravation over the numerous outbursts and unexpected meltdowns brought on by an unexpected trigger. However, many of the triggers that result in behavioral issues may be directly related to the child’s frustration over not being able to complete a certain task or perform to his or her self-imposed expectations. This can, in turn, contribute to feelings of discouragement that result in the child “giving-up” (i.e., refusing to give things a second t

"I would like ideas on how to deal with my (HFA) son’s frustrations. He will either dig his heels in and refuse to do what he is supposed to do, or he shuts down and then we have a time away so he can get himself together to discuss the problem. It seems he works himself up over things that are not that big a deal." Children with High Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger's (AS) overreact to crowds, confusing situations, sensory stimuli, and situations in which they are asked to do things they don’t want to do. Situations or problems that seem minor to most of us are a “big deal” to those with the disorder because they don’t know how to handle them. Low frustration-tolerance originates from the youngster’s dysfunctional and irrational beliefs. Behaviors are then the result of avoiding frustrating events which, paradoxically, lead to increased frustration and even greater mental stress. Low frustration-tolerance occurs when the youngster gets upset and has an u

“I have a 5 year old with high-functioning autism. Whenever he encounters something frustrating, it’s like he ‘flips a switch’. He will go from cheerful and engaged to mad and yelling in one split second. I'm not sure if this happens simply because he encounters something hard, or if it is a buildup of frustration over time that results in a big meltdown when he finally hits his tipping point. Maybe he misses his anger cues throughout the day, and that causes a flood of emotions when he confronts something particularly frustrating. Are there some ways to teach him to calm himself so that he doesn’t get to the point of exploding?” Most kids with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) and Asperger’s (AS) struggle with low-frustration tolerance. Frustration is a powerful emotion, and their reactions can be intense in the moment. “Typical” children usually know when their anger buttons are being pushed. And many of them know what they need to do to work through something frustrating in

“My 5 y.o. son Noah (with high functioning autism) will tantrum over all things big and small. If he is the least bit frustrated over something – well look out, because ‘it’s on’!  Not uncommon for him to have a dozen tantrums in a day. I would be happy to just get that cut in half. Any tips for the chronic ‘tantrum-thrower’ would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.” The best time to teach your son alternatives to throwing a tantrum is immediately after he has one. Once Noah has settled down, you and he should have a talk while the memories of the episode are still fresh in his mind. Your son threw the tantrum because he was frustrated or mad. Don't get into the issue of why he was “out of control.” Focus on the tantrum itself, explaining to Noah that the behavior isn't appropriate. Then teach him what he should do instead when he feels upset. Here’s a simple method that often works when done the right way: 1. First describe the behavior. For exa

Understanding the developmental factors that contribute to biting behavior in children with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) can help moms and dads make environmental or programmatic changes as necessary to minimize the behavior. Guidance to kids who bite should be provided with the goal of helping them develop inner control of their feelings and actions. A quick and consistent response at home can help kids who bite learn to express their feelings in words so that they can become better able to control their behavior. Why Do Children With Aspergers and HFA Resort To Biting? 1. An attempt to gain sensory input: Many Aspergers children experience sensory difficulties, so it can be helpful to consider the possible sensory functions of particular behaviors. Chewing and biting are proprioceptive activities (i.e., they provide sensory input to the proprioceptive system, which regulates what different parts of the body are doing at different times). Biting can also provide oral

In this post, we’re going to look at temper tantrums in children with ASD Level 1, or High-Functioning Autism (HFA). Tantrums should not be confused with meltdowns. There does seem to be a fine line between tantrums and meltdowns, so if you’re not sure which is which, view this video first: What is the difference between a meltdown and a tantrum? Temper tantrums range from whining and crying to screaming, kicking, hitting, and breath holding. HFA temperaments vary dramatically — so some kids may experience regular temper tantrums, whereas others have them rarely. They're a normal part of development and don't have to be seen as something negative. However, unlike “typical” children, HFA kids don't have the same inhibitions or control. Imagine how it feels when you're determined to program your DVD player and aren't able to do it no matter how hard you try, because you can't understand how. It's very frustrating! Do you swear, throw the manual, walk aw