My ASD Child

“My 8 y.o. son Cory has a diagnosis of autism (high functioning) and has uncontrollable outbursts and aggression when things don’t go his way. He often becomes so distraught that his suffering is palpable. The emotions vivid on his face. His little body tense with distress. Sometimes he will meltdown, at other times he shuts down. Is this just par for the course with autism? Is there anything that can help reduce the intensity, duration and frequency of these behaviors?” RE: “Is this just par for the course with autism?” Yes! Many moms and dads recognize that their high-functioning autistic (Asperger’s) youngster has a problem with anger-control. Many feel that their youngster needs to develop some anger-control skills, or needs to find some kind of counseling that will help him get along better in life (e.g., at school, with a parent, with siblings and classmates, etc.). In some cases, professionals have diagnosed a highly-aggressive youngster on the spectrum with Opposition...

Would you say your child has frequent mood swings and an anger-management problem? If so, then read on… As a parent of a child with Asperger’s (AS) or High Functioning Autism (HFA), it’s a very good idea to draw up a written contract detailing the things you want your child to practice in the course of his anger-management program. Drafting such a contract is a way of providing structure and support, which is crucial for children on the autism spectrum since they need and crave structure. The items included in the contract should be written from the perspective of the child (i.e., phrased in the first person). For example, “When I get angry, I will stop what I’m doing and go get my favorite stuffed toy to hug” …rather than, “When Michael gets angry, he will stop what he’s doing and go get his favorite stuffed toy to hug.” The details of the contract are important. You want to be very specific in describing: The goals for the anger-control program (i.e., what you hop...

"I need help FAST with what to do about my teenage son with autism - high functioning, and his out of control rage!!! Please I need advice." Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) may be prone to anger, which can be made worse by difficulty in communicating feelings of disturbance, anxiety or distress. Anger may be a common reaction experienced when coming to terms with problems in employment, relationships, friendships and other areas in life affected by the disorder. There can be an ‘on-off’ quality to this anger, where the teenager may be calm minutes later after an angry outburst, while those around are stunned and may feel hurt or shocked for hours, if not days, afterward. Parents often struggle to understand these angry outbursts, with resentment and bitterness often building up over time. Once they understand that their teen has trouble controlling his anger or understanding its effects on others, they can often begin to respond i...

Aspergers (high functioning autistic) kid’s anger presents challenges to educators committed to constructive, ethical, and effective youngster guidance. This post explores what we know about the components of Aspergers kid’s anger, factors contributing to understanding and managing anger, and the ways educators can guide kid’s expressions of anger. Three Components of Anger— Anger is believed to have three components (Lewis & Michalson, 1983): The Emotional State of Anger. The first component is the emotion itself, defined as an affective or arousal state, or a feeling experienced when a goal is blocked or needs are frustrated. Fabes and Eisenberg (1992) describe several types of stress-producing anger provocations that young kids face daily in classroom interactions: Conflict over possessions, which involves someone taking kid’s property or invading their space. Issues of compliance, which often involve asking or insisting that kids do something that they do not...

"I desperately need ideas on how to deal with an autistic child (high functioning) who is often agitated and angered. We rarely know what will trigger him, as it seems to vary widely from situation to situation - and from day to day." All children experience anger. But, young people with Asperger’s (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA), in particular, have difficulty channeling their strong emotions into acceptable outlets. Anger is a response to a real or perceived loss or stress. It results when an individual’s body, property, self-esteem, or values are threatened. Anger is often a reaction to feeling frustrated, hurt, misunderstood, or rejected. If your youngster does not learn how to release his or her anger appropriately, it can fester and explode in inappropriate ways, or be internalized and damage his or her sense of self-worth. As a mother or father, dealing with an angry youngster is inevitable. Many of us have heard our own pre-parenting voice whisper to ...

"Is it common for children with high functioning autism to be highly explosive? My daughter can fly off the handle in a heartbeat for what seems to be rather trivial matters (to me anyway)." Children with High-Functioning Autism (HFA) often have a difficult time controlling their anger as compared to “typical” children, which is due to the fact that they have problems understanding their emotions and their impact on others. In addition, they aren’t living in a void in which they don’t understand that they’re different from other kids. Often teased and rejected by their peers, they can have emerging anger they don’t understand and can’t easily control. Helping these children with anger problems requires direct communication about the effect of their anger on others as well as methods of improving their low self-esteem and poor sense of self-worth, which is often at the root of the youngster’s anger. Anger that’s acted-out badly needs to be treated like any ot...