Six-Step Plan for Teachers of Aspergers Students

Following the six-step plan, detailed below, will help prepare you for the entrance of a youngster with Aspergers (high functioning autism) in your classroom, as well as foster inclusion throughout the school. The steps are as follows: (1) educate yourself; (2) reach out to the moms and dads; (3) prepare the classroom; (4) educate peers and promote social goals; (5) collaborate on the implementation of an educational program; and (6) manage behavioral challenges.

Step 1: Educate Yourself—

As the person responsible for the education and behavior management of all your children, including a youngster with Aspergers, you must have a working understanding of Aspergers and its associated behaviors. Different behaviors are very much a part of Aspergers. When kids with Aspergers do not respond to the use of language or act out in class, it is typically not because they are ignoring you, trying to clown around, or waste class time. These behaviors may be more related to their Aspergers, and they may be having difficulty interpreting language and expressing their needs in socially acceptable ways. It is important to find ways to create a comfortable environment for your children with Aspergers so that they can participate meaningfully in the classroom.

Learning about Aspergers in general and about the specific characteristics of your child will help you effectively manage this behavior and teach your class. You have already started your education by reading this guide. Below are some helpful hints that can guide everyday school life for young people with Aspergers. They can be applied to individuals with Aspergers across the school years and are applicable to almost all environments.

Operate on “Asperger time.” “Asperger time” means, “Twice as much time, half as much done.” Children with Aspergers often need additional time to complete assignments, to gather materials, and to orient themselves during transitions. Provide this time or modify requirements so they can fit in the time allotted and match the child’s pace. Avoid rushing a youngster with Aspergers, as this typically results in the youngster shutting down. When time constraints are added to an already stressful day, the child can become overwhelmed and immobilized.

Manage the environment. Any changes―unexpected changes, in particular―can increase anxiety in a child with Aspergers; even changes considered to be minor can cause significant stress. Whenever possible, provide consistency in the schedule and avoid sudden changes. Prepare the youngster for changes by discussing them in advance, over-viewing a social narrative on the change, or showing a picture of the change. The environment can also be managed by incorporating child preferences that may serve to decrease his or her stress. For example, when going on a field trip, the child might be assigned to sit with a group of preferred peers. Or if the field trip is going to include lunch, the child has access to the menu the day before so he or she can plan what to eat.

Create a balanced agenda. Make a visual schedule that includes daily activities for children with Aspergers. It is essential that the demands of the daily schedule or certain classes or activities be monitored and restructured, as needed. For example, “free time,” which is considered fun for typically developing youth, may be challenging for children with Aspergers because of noise levels, unpredictability of events, and social skills problems.

For a youngster with Aspergers, free time may have to be structured with prescribed activities to reduce stress and anxiety. A good scheduling strategy is to alternate between preferred and non-preferred activities with periods in the schedule for downtime. It is important to distinguish free time from downtime. Free time refers to periods during the school day when children are engaged in unstructured activities that have marked social demands and limited teacher supervision. Lunch time, passing time between classes, and time at school before classes actually begin all meet the criteria for free time. These activities are stressful for many children with Aspergers. Downtime, on the other hand, provides an opportunity for the youngster or youth with Aspergers to relax or de-stress. Children’ downtime may include using sensory items, drawing, or listening to music to relieve stress. During downtime, excessive demands are not made on the children.

Share the agenda. Children with Aspergers have difficulty distinguishing between essential and nonessential information. In addition, they often do not remember information that many of us have learned from past experiences or that to others come as common sense. Thus, it is important to state the obvious. One way to do this is to “live out loud.” Naming what you are doing helps the youngster with Aspergers accurately put together what you are doing with the why and the how. In addition, “living out loud” helps the child to stay on task and anticipate what will happen next.

Simplify language. Keep your language concise and simple, and speak at a slow deliberate pace. Do not expect a child with Aspergers to “read between the lines,” understand abstract concepts like sarcasm, or know what you mean by using facial expression only. Be specific when providing instructions. Ensure that the youngster with Aspergers knows what to do, how to do it, and when to do it. Be clear, and clarify as needed.

Manage change of plans. When planning activities, make sure the child with Aspergers is aware that the activities are planned, not guaranteed. Children with Aspergers need to understand that activities can be changed, canceled, or rescheduled. In addition, create backup plans and share them with the youngster with Aspergers. When an unavoidable situation occurs, be flexible and recognize that change is stressful for people with Aspergers; adapt expectations and your language accordingly.

For example, a teacher could state, “Our class is scheduled to go to the park tomorrow. If it rains, you can read your favorite book on dinosaurs.” Prepare children for change whenever possible; tell them about assemblies, fire drills, guest speakers, and testing schedules. In addition to changes within the school day, recurring transitions, such as vacations and the beginning and end of the school year, may cause a youngster with Aspergers to be anxious about the change. Children with Aspergers may require additional time to adjust to the new schedule and/or environment.

Provide reassurance. Because children with Aspergers cannot predict upcoming events, they are often unsure about what they are to do. Provide information and reassurance frequently so that the child knows he is moving in the right direction or completing the correct task. Use frequent check-ins to monitor child progress and stress.

Be generous with praise. Find opportunities throughout the day to tell young people with Aspergers what they did right. Compliment attempts as well as successes. Be specific to ensure that the child with Aspergers knows why the teacher is providing praise.

Step 2: Reach Out to the Parents—

It is vitally important to develop a working partnership with the moms and dads of your child with Aspergers. They are your first and best source of information about their youngster and Aspergers as it manifests itself in that youngster’s behavior and daily activities. Ideally, this partnership will begin with meetings before the school year. After that, it is critical to establish mutually agreed-upon modes and patterns of communication with the family throughout the school year. Your first conversations with the family should focus on the individual characteristics of the child, identifying strengths and areas of challenge. The family may have suggestions for practical accommodations that can be made in the classroom to help the youngster function at his or her highest potential. In these conversations, it is critical to establish a tone of mutual respect while maintaining realistic expectations for the course of the year.

Building trust with the moms and dads is very important. Communication with families about the progress of the child should be ongoing. If possible, schedule a monthly meeting to discuss the youngster’s progress and any problems he or she may be having. If regular telephone calls or meetings are hard to schedule, you can exchange journals, e-mails, or audiotapes with families. While the information you exchange may often focus on current classroom challenges, strategies employed, and ideas for alternative solutions, do not forget to include positive feedback on accomplishments and milestones reached. Families could respond with their perspective on the problem and their suggestions for solutions. Families can also support you from home in your social and behavioral goals for your child with Aspergers.

Open, ongoing communication with families of children with Aspergers creates a powerful alliance. Be aware that some families may have had negative experiences with other schools or educators in the past. You will have to help them work through that. If you make the effort to communicate with the family about the progress of their youngster and listen to their advice and suggestions, they will accept you as their youngster’s advocate and thus be more likely to give you their complete support.

Step 3: Prepare the Classroom—

Having learned about the individual sensitivities and characteristics of your child with Aspergers, you now have the information you need to organize your classroom appropriately. There are ways that you can manipulate the physical aspects of your classroom and ways you can place kids with Aspergers within the classroom to make them more comfortable without sacrificing your plans for the class in general. Use the search bar at the top of this page for more information about specific approaches for structuring the academic and physical environment to address the particular behaviors, sensitivities, and characteristics of your individual child with Aspergers.

Step 4: Educate Peers and Promote Social Goals—

Perhaps the most common myth about kids with Aspergers is that they do not have the ability, motivation, or desire to establish and maintain meaningful relationships with others, including friendships with peers. This, for the most part, is not true. There is no doubt that kids with Aspergers have social deficits that make it more difficult for them to establish friendships than typically developing kids. However, with appropriate assistance, kids with Aspergers can engage with peers and establish mutually enjoyable and lasting relationships. It is critical that educators of kids with Aspergers believe this to be true and expect children with Aspergers to make and maintain meaningful relationships with the adults and other kids in the classroom.

Clearly stated social skills, behaviors, and objectives should be part of the IEP and assessed regularly for progress. While teasing may be a common occurrence in the everyday school experience for young people, kids with Aspergers often cannot discriminate between playful versus mean-spirited teasing. Educators and moms and dads can help kids with Aspergers recognize the difference and respond appropriately. A more serious form of teasing is bullying. It is important for educators and school staff to know that children with Aspergers are potentially prime targets of bullying or excessive teasing and to be vigilant for the signs of such activities to protect the youngster’s safety and self-esteem.

One strategy for educators could be to assign a “buddy” or safe child in the classroom. In this way, the child with Aspergers would have a friend to listen to them and to report any potential conflicts with other children. Also, educators should routinely check in with the child with Aspergers and/or the moms and dads to ensure the comfort of the child in the classroom. In addition to the “buddy” strategy described above, it may also be important to educate typically developing children about the common traits and behaviors of kids with Aspergers.

The characteristics of Aspergers can cause peers to perceive a youngster with the disorder as odd or different, which can lead to situations that involve teasing or bullying. Research shows that typically developing peers have more positive attitudes, increased understanding, and greater acceptance of kids with Aspergers when provided with clear, accurate, and straightforward information about the disorder. When educated about Aspergers and specific strategies for how to effectively interact with kids with Aspergers, more frequent and positive social interactions are likely to result.

Many of the social interactions occur outside the classroom in the cafeteria and on the playground. Without prior planning and extra help, children with Aspergers may end up sitting by themselves during these unstructured times. To ensure this does not happen, you may consider a rotating assignment of playground peer buddies for the child with Aspergers. The child will then have a chance to observe and model appropriate social behavior of different classmates throughout the year. This “circle of friends” can also be encouraged outside of school. The academic and social success of young people with Aspergers can be greatly enhanced when the classroom environment supports their unique challenges. Peer education interventions, such as those listed in the Resources section of this guide, can be used with little training and have been shown to improve outcomes for both typically developing peers and young people with developmental disorders, such as autism and Aspergers.

Step 5: Collaborate on the Educational Program Development—

The next key step in your preparations will be to participate in the development and implementation of an educational program for your child with Aspergers. It is critical to develop this plan based on the assessment of the youngster’s current academic skills and his or her educational goals, as defined in the IEP.

A Brief Legislative History…

Congress passed the Education of All Handicapped Kids Act in 1975 and reauthorized it in 1990 as IDEA. This legislation guarantees that all children with disabilities will be provided a free and appropriate public education (FAPE). It also states that children with disabilities should be placed in the least restrictive environment (LRE), where they can make progress toward achieving their IEP goals, meaning that as much as possible, kids with disabilities should be educated with kids who are not disabled. Finally, it states that children with disabilities must have an IEP, which describes the child’s current level of functioning, his or her goals for the year, and how these goals will be supported through special services.

IEPs are an important focus of the six-step plan, and they are discussed in greater detail below. Because the challenges associated with Aspergers affect many key aspects of development, the impact of the disorder on education and learning is profound. Therefore, kids with Aspergers are considered disabled under the IDEA guidelines and are legally entitled to an IEP plan and appropriate accommodations from the school to help them achieve their developmental and academic goals.

Individualized Education Program…

IEPs are created by a multidisciplinary team of education professionals, along with the youngster’s moms and dads, and are tailored to the needs of the individual child. The IEP is a blueprint for everything that will happen to a youngster in school for the next year. Special and general education educators, speech and language therapists, occupational therapists, school psychologists, and families form the IEP team and meet intermittently to discuss child progress on IEP goals.

Before the IEP team meets, an assessment team gathers information together about the child to make an evaluation and recommendation. The school psychologist, social worker, classroom teacher, and/or speech pathologist are examples of educational professionals who conduct educational assessments. A neurologist may conduct a medical evaluation, and an audiologist may complete hearing tests. The classroom teacher also gives input about the academic progress and classroom behavior of the child. Moms and dads give input to each specialist throughout the process. Then, one person on the evaluation team coordinates all the information, and the team meets to make recommendations to the IEP team. The IEP team, which consists of the school personnel who work with the child and families, then meets to write the IEP based on the evaluation and team member suggestions.

IEPs always include annual goals, short-term objectives, and special education services required by the child, as well as a yearly evaluation to see if the goals were met. Annual goals must explain measurable behaviors so that it is clear what progress should have been made by the end of the year. The short-term objectives should contain incremental and sequential steps toward meeting each annual goal. Annual goals and short-term objectives can be about developing social and communication skills, or reducing problem behavior. Appendix E (page 61) provides more information on IEP and transition planning for children with Aspergers, including writing objectives and developing measurable IEP goals for learners with Aspergers.

As a general education teacher, you will be responsible for reporting back to the IEP team on the child’s progress toward meeting specific academic, social, and behavioral goals and objectives as outlined in the IEP. You also will be asked for input about developing new goals for the child in subsequent and review IEP meetings. This resource can decrease the time spent documenting the child’s performance in a comprehensive manner.

Step 6: Manage Behavioral Challenges—

Many children with Aspergers view school as a stressful environment. Commonplace academic and social situations can present several stressors to these children that are ongoing and of great magnitude. Examples of these stressors include:

• Anticipating changes, such as classroom lighting, sounds/noises, odors, etc.
• Difficulty predicting events because of changing schedules
• Interacting with peers
• Tuning into and understanding teacher’s directions

Children with Aspergers rarely indicate in any overt way that they are under stress or are experiencing difficulty coping. In fact, they may not always know that they are near a stage of crisis. However, meltdowns do not occur without warning. There is a pattern of behavior, which is sometimes subtle, that can indicate a forthcoming behavioral outburst for a young person with Aspergers. For example, a child who is not blinking may well be so neurologically overloaded that they have “tuned out.” They may appear to be listening to a lesson when, in fact, they are taking nothing in. Tantrums, rage, and meltdowns (terms that are used interchangeably) typically occur in three stages that can be of variable length. These stages and associated interventions are described below. The best intervention for these behavioral outbursts is to prevent them through the use of appropriate academic, environmental, social, and sensory supports and modification to environment and expectations.

The Cycle of Tantrums, Rage, and Meltdowns and Related Interventions…

Rumbling-

During the initial stage, young people with Aspergers exhibit specific behavioral changes that may appear to be minor, such as nail biting, tensing muscles, or otherwise indicating discomfort. During this stage, it is imperative that an adult intervene without becoming part of a struggle.

Intervention-

Effective interventions during this stage include: antiseptic bouncing, proximity control, support from routine and home base. All of these strategies can be effective in stopping the cycle of tantrums, rage, and meltdowns and can help the youngster regain control with minimal adult support.

Rage-

If behavior is not diffused during the rumbling stage, the young person may move to the rage stage. At this point, the youngster is disinhibited and acts impulsively, emotionally, and sometimes explosively. These behaviors may be externalized (i.e., screaming, biting, hitting, kicking, destroying property, or self-injury) or internalized (i.e., withdrawal). Meltdowns are not purposeful, and once the rage stage begins, it most often must run its course.

Intervention-

Emphasis should be placed on youngster, peer, and adult safety, as well as protection of school, home, or personal property. Of importance here is helping the individual with Aspergers regain control and preserve dignity. Adults should have developed plans for (a) obtaining assistance from educators, such as a crisis teacher or principal; (b) removing the child from the area [removing the upset child from the peer group is far less memorable for the peers than is moving the entire peer group away from the upset child]; or (c) providing therapeutic restraint, if necessary. Especially in elementary and middle school, every effort should be made to prevent allowing a child to have a meltdown in view of peers as this behavior tends to “define” the child in the peers’ minds in years ahead.

Recovery-

Following a meltdown, the youngster with Aspergers often cannot fully remember what occurred during the rage stage. Some may become sullen, withdraw, or deny that inappropriate behavior occurred. Other individuals are so physically exhausted that they need to sleep.

Intervention-

During the recovery stage, kids are often not ready to learn. Thus, it is important that adults work with them to help them to once again become a part of the routine. This is often best accomplished by directing the youth to a highly motivating task that can be easily accomplished, such as an activity related to a special interest. If appropriate, when the child has calmed sufficiently, “process” the incident with the child. Staff should analyze the incident to identify whether or not the environment, expectations, or staff behavior played a role in precipitating the incident.

Pulling It All Together—

The six-step plan presents a constructive framework for how to approach the inclusion of a youngster with Aspergers in your classroom. Specific strategies for developing and providing academic, environmental, and social supports are given in the Appendices of this guide. Your classroom is already a diverse place, including many children with varying backgrounds, talents, difficulties, and interests. With the increasing inclusion of children with Aspergers, the challenges associated with managing a diverse classroom into today’s educational environment will grow. Just as every youngster with Aspergers is different, so is every school environment. It is quite likely that there will be constraints -- environmental, interpersonal, financial, and administrative -- on the ways that you can implement the approaches suggested in the Guide.

Despite the challenges, your hard work makes a difference in the lives of all the kids in the classroom. It is clear, though, that kids with Aspergers may need more help and support than some of your typically developing children.

As you learn more about kids with differences and how to support their inclusion in the classroom, you will become a mentor to other educators who may be facing this challenge for the first time. Many of the skills that make you a powerful educator will help you succeed in the tasks ahead of you. Your curiosity will fuel your education about Aspergers and other disorders on the autism spectrum; your communication skills will help you create a meaningful alliance with the moms and dads of the youngster with Aspergers in your class.

Most of all, your collaboration skills will help you work as a key part of the team that will support the youngster with Aspergers throughout the course of the school year. The reward for your patience, kindness, and professionalism will be the unique sense of satisfaction that comes with knowing that you have helped a youngster with a special need and will have made a difference in that young person’s life! 

Struggling with an Aspergers student? Click here for highly effective teaching strategies -- specific to the Aspergers condition.

High-Functioning Autism and Struggles in Adolescence

“I have a very lonely and depressed 17 year old son with high functioning autism that spends all of his time (except for going to school) in his bedroom playing video games. I don’t totally understand why he is always so down in the dumps. I wish there was something I could do to help him find some friends and start enjoying life. Any suggestions?”

Adolescence is probably the most miserable and complicated years for many young people with ASD level 1, or High-Functioning Autism (HFA). This is not true of everyone – some do extremely well. Their indifference to what peers think makes them indifferent to the intense peer pressure of adolescence. They can flourish within their specialty and become accomplished in their area of interest (e.g., music, history, etc.).

Unfortunately, many HFA adolescents become more socially isolated during a period when they crave friendships and inclusion more than ever. In the rough-and-tough world of middle and high school, these adolescents often face rejection, isolation and bullying. To make matters worse, school becomes more demanding in a period when these young people have to compete for college placements. Issues of sexuality and a desire for independence from moms and dads create even more problems.

In the adolescent world where everyone feels insecure, young people that appear different or “odd” are voted out of “the group.” HFA teens often have strange mannerisms (e.g., talk in a loud un-modulated voice, avoid eye contact, interrupt others, violate others physical space, steer the conversation to their favorite “odd” topic, etc.). Many of these young people appear willful, selfish and aloof, mostly because they are unable to share their thoughts and feelings with others. Isolated and alone, these adolescents are simply too anxious to initiate social contact.

 

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

Many adolescents on the spectrum are stiff and rule-oriented and act like little adults, which is a deadly trait in any adolescent popularity contest. Friendship and all its nuances of reciprocity can be exhausting for these teenagers, even though they want it more than anything else.

HFA teenagers typically don’t care about current fads and clothing styles (concerns that obsess everyone else in their peer group). Also, these adolescents may neglect their hygiene and wear the same haircut for years. Some autistic teens remain stuck in grammar school clothes and hobbies (e.g., unicorns, Legos, dolls, etc.) instead of moving into adolescent concerns like FaceBook and dating. HFA males often have little motor coordination, which leaves them out of high school sports (typically an essential area of male bonding and friendship).

Adolescents on the autism spectrum are not privy to street knowledge of sex and dating behaviors that other adolescents pick up naturally. This leaves them naive and clueless. HFA males can become obsessed with Internet pornography and masturbation. They can be overly forward with a female peer who is simply being kind, and then they can get accused of stalking the girl. HFA girls may have fully developed bodies, but no understanding of flirtation and non-verbal sexual cues, thus making them susceptible to harassment – and even date rape.

Loneliness and depression can lead to problems with drugs, sex and alcohol. In their overwhelming need to “fit in” and make friends, some adolescents on the spectrum fall into the wrong crowd. Typical adolescents who abuse drugs and alcohol may use the autistic teen's naivety to get him or her to buy/carry drugs and alcohol for their group.

Many adolescents on the spectrum, with their average to above average IQs, can sail through elementary school, and yet hit academic problems in middle and high school. They now have to deal with 5 to 7 different teachers instead of just 1 or 2. The likelihood that at least one teacher will be indifferent - or even hostile - toward making special accommodations is almost certain. The HFA teenager now has to face a series of classroom environments with different classmates, odors, distractions, noise levels, and sets of expectations.

HFA adolescents, with their distractibility and difficulty organizing materials, face similar academic problems as young people with ADHD. A high school term paper or a science project becomes impossible to manage, because no one has taught the youngster how to break it up into a series of small steps. Even though the academic stress on autistic students can be overwhelming, school administrators may be reluctant to enroll them in special education at this late point in their educational career.

Adolescence is an emotional rollercoaster for all teens. But, the hormonal changes of adolescence coupled with the problems associated with having an autism spectrum disorder mean that HFA adolescents can easily become emotionally overwhelmed. Childish tantrums can reappear. Males often act-out by physically attacking the teacher or a schoolmate. They may experience "meltdowns" at home after another day filled with harassment, bullying, pressure to conform, and rejection. Depression and drug/alcohol abuse become real concerns, as the adolescent now has access to a vehicle, drugs and alcohol.

The parent of an adolescent with HFA often faces many problems that others parents don’t. As the teen approaches adulthood, time is quickly running out for teaching him or her how to become an independent adult. The parent may face issues like vocational training, teaching independent living, and providing lifetime financial support. Meanwhile, the immature autistic teen is often indifferent – and even hostile – to the parent’s concerns.

Once HFA youngsters enter the adolescent years, they are harder to control and less likely to listen to their parents. They may be tired of parents nagging them to “pay attention to people when they’re talking to you” … “comb your hair” … “you need a shower” … “get up, it’s time to get ready for school” …and so on. They may hate school because they are dealing with so much anxiety, social isolation and academic failure.
 
==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

Here are some ways moms and dads of HFA adolescents can help:

1. Because of their sensitivity to textures, HFA adolescents often wear the same clothes day in and day out. This is unacceptable in middle or high school. One idea that has worked for some moms and dads is to find an adolescent of the same age and sex as your teen, and then enlist that person’s help in choosing clothes that will enable your teen to blend in with his or her peers.

2. Most adolescents with ASD level 1 can learn to drive, but their learning process may take longer because of poor motor coordination. Once they learn a set of rules, they are likely to follow them to the letter. However, these teens may have trouble dealing with unexpected situations on the road. Have your teen carry a cell phone, and give him or her a printed card that explains autism spectrum disorders. Teach him or her to give the card to a police officer and phone you in a crisis.

3. Alcoholic and drugs often react adversely with a person’s prescriptions, so you have to teach your teenager about these dangers in the event he or she is taking any medications. Also, since most HFA adolescents are very rule-oriented, try emphasizing that drugs and alcohol are illegal.

4. If your adolescent is college-bound, you have to prepare him or her for the experience. You can plan a trip to the campus and show your adolescent where to buy books, where the health services are, and so on. Teach your adolescent how to handle everyday problems, like where to buy deodorant, what to do if you oversleep and miss a class, etc.

5. If the pressure on your adolescent to conform is too great, if she or he faces constant harassment and rejection, if the principal and teachers do not cooperate with you, then it may be time to find another school. The adolescent years are often when many moms and dads decide it is in their adolescent’s best interest to enter special education or a therapeutic boarding school. In a boarding school, professionals will guide your son or daughter academically and socially on a twenty-four hour basis. They do not allow males to isolate themselves with video games. Everyone has to participate in social activities. Also, counseling staff helps with college placements. 

 

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

If you decide to work within a public school system, you may have to hire a lawyer to get needed services. Your HFA adolescent should have an Individual Education Plan (IEP) and accommodations for the learning disabled. This may mean placement in smaller classes, having a tutor, and obtaining special arrangements for gym and lunchtime. Teach your adolescent to find a safe place at school where he or she can share emotions with a trusted professional. The safe place may be the offices of the school nurse, guidance counselor, or a psychologist.

6. You MUST teach your adolescent about sex. You should NOT "talk around" the issue. You will have to be specific and detailed about safe sex and teach your adolescent to tell you about inappropriate touching by others. He or she may need remedial “sex education” (e.g., females need to understand that they are too old to sit on laps or give hugs to strangers, and males may have to learn to close toilet stall doors and masturbate only in private).

7. Teach your adolescent how to initiate contact with others. Teach how to leave phone messages and arrange details of social contacts (e.g., finding transportation to a school event). Encourage your adolescent to join high school clubs (e.g., chess or drama). It is not necessary for you to tell your teen’s peers that he or she has an autism spectrum disorder – let your teen do that. Many adolescents with HFA are enjoying each other's company through Internet chat rooms, forums and message boards.

8. Most summer and part-time jobs involve interaction with the public (e.g., movie usher, fast food worker, store clerk, etc.). This means they are not always a good fit for an adolescent with HFA. Some of these young people can find work in their field of special interest or in jobs that have little interpersonal interaction. Others have spent joyful summers at camps designed for “special needs” individuals like them.

As you prepare your adolescent for the workforce, keep in mind that individuals with HFA often do not understand office politics. They have problems with the basics (e.g., handling criticism, controlling emotions, showing up on time, working with the public, etc.). This does not mean they can’t hold down a job. Once they master certain aspects of employment, Adolescents and young adults on the spectrum are often able to work at high levels as accountants, research scientists, computer programmers, and so on.

 

Resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism

==> Videos for Parents of Children and Teens with ASD

 

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Resources for Neurodiverse Couples:

==> Online Group Therapy for Men with ASD

==> Online Group Therapy for NT Wives

==> Living with ASD: eBook and Audio Instruction for Neurodiverse Couples 

==> One-on-One Counseling for Struggling Individuals & Couples Affected by ASD

==> Online Group Therapy for Couples Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder

 ==> Cassandra Syndrome Recovery for NT Wives

==> ASD Men's MasterClass: Social-Skills Training and Emotional-Literacy Development

==> Pressed for time? Watch these "less-than-one-minute" videos for on the go.

PARENTS' COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said... an instrument could help -my boy plays drums and loves it ...more confidence anyway...
•    Anonymous said... Aspies have a VERY hard time finding, making and keeping friends. When I was a teen I lost ALL of my friends my 9th grade year. Every last one. I was depressed and suicidal. I couldn't understand what I was doing wrong and why no one liked me!!! I do now though and today I know that I have Aspergers and so do two of my four children. We also believe my husband has it as well.  Computers/games/electronics allows us to focus on something else other that ourselves (Aspies are also VERY egocentric) and to escape. It helps us turn off our brains. It is comfort and it is release. The world of books is also comparable. For me, when I wasn't on the computer (I spent a lot of time programming - taught myself to do it when I was 8 yrs old), on my nintendo or my atari, I was reading. Those were probably the only things that kept me alive. If I'd had nowhere to escape to, I probably would have killed myself back then just to get that escape! Anyway, that's just my insight based on my own experiences. My two aspie kids also do this as well, especially my son, who also seems "mopey" all the time. He deals with being understimulated and a total lack of an ability to display emotion. So he might be REALLY excited about something but you would never know it based on his body language and facial expression. Hope this all helps!!!
•    Anonymous said... Attending church & going to youth group functions is a tremendous blessing for my 15 yr. Old.
•    Anonymous said... Certified Classical Homeopath
•    Anonymous said... Find your state's autism society or advocacy organization and see if there are support/social groups for his age. If there aren't then start one! These nonprofit agencies offer wonderful support. I have found church and sports organizations that aren't affiliated with special needs groups specifically to be a mine field. You never know how accepting they can be but there are plenty of people out there in your position and you just need to connect with them! Also, look into letting him start community college. My son it only 10 but I have friends who have older Aspergers kids and they find their niche in community college where people tend to be more mature about accepting people into their groups. I live in Washington state and I came from Colorado where I had a wonderful resource outlet! If you are anywhere near me or would like some help finding some resources you can PM me! I don't mind helping anyone find support!
•    Anonymous said... get him some professional help asap - find a therapist who specializes in adolescents on the spectrum, or a social skills group. Homeopathy can work wonders; find a CCH and get him treated asap. Do not take this lightly.
•    Anonymous said... Good suggestions so far. I would also suggest encouraging more social interaction online. My husband is an Aspie who was not diagnosed until in his 30's but when he was a teenager he struggled immensely with in person interactions and relationships but was able to connect much easier online and this was back before the internet It may seem counterintuitive but for those with asperger's it can provide a place to belong, access to friends, and socialization in a way that is more comfortable for them which may help with the lonely depressed feeling. I also strongly agree with the suggestion to find him a therapist who works specifically with Aspies and look for a social skills group. Most importantly, remember that his way of interacting with the world may be different than yours and that there is nothing wrong with that. Make sure you are not trying to make him into the version of him you want for him - support him being who he is and what he needs to be happy. Hope that helps!
•    Anonymous said... I would agree with Tristan. My son is 5 and if he gets too much screen time (ie. computer,tv, even Leapster) his behavior is much worse. We are working online with a Biomedical Dr named Dr. Woeller. He has given us great advice on all natural supplements for balanced behavior!
•    Anonymous said... My 8 year old spends every available minute glued to a computer, or game console. We did not want to stop him from his one interest but were concerned that it was not healthy. He is now learning HTML programming so he can make his own web pages and hopefully he will go on to game programming later. We take him to all the conventions (comic con, Supa nova etc) as he loves to dress up as his fav game/anime characters and he even did Cosplay in front of a couple thousand people this year. I don't think taking the computer away is the answer. Sometimes they are ok but my son just gets angry, frustrated and depressed. Try engaging with them. We play games with my son online now. We play League of Legends with him and have our own mine craft server
•    Anonymous said... My aspie son helped his depression and anxiety with working out. Specifically LA Boxing workouts. Also list out his favorite non computer activities and find events related. For example my son liked yu gi oh cards so i started taking him to tournaments. Also when i limited computer time to weekends his depression and behavior improved. Best of luck. Address issues as early as you can.
•    Anonymous said... Really my son is exactly the same, as been put down to asperges and been a teenager, he asnt been certified anything
•    Anonymous said... similiar situation here too
•    Anonymous said... Sounds like my son
•    Anonymous said... This is an awesome article. It is helpful to hear someone put into words what you continue to observe but can't really understand. Thanks for posting.
•    Anonymous said... very helpful thank you.
•    Anonymous said... Depressed aspies need counseling. I've found that to be the best solution
•    Anonymous said... Hi my newly diagnosed daughter is 14 years old. She also plays "Sims" most of her free time for hrs. She has managed to keep one close friend from Primary School who she meets now & again. They play computer games all day when they meet up. I was just thinking whilst standing washing up a minute ago....the word isolation came in my mind. That's what I feel like as a caring parent so heaven knows how she feels. Just had an hr & half of calming her down after 2 and half hrs at her short stay medical school. She is staying there until age 16 as no other provision available at her age as starting GSCE's. She has been put on Prozac as her depression was getting so bad. It has helped lots. It enables her to socialise for about 3 hrs without meltdown or fatigue. I feel for you.....it is so hard. I am researching, reading all the time about Asperger's. My daughter has started blogging her experiences, passions etc. I hope for her to connect with othet teens with Aspergers over the internet to widen her friend base? Good luck with you son.
•    Anonymous said... I know it's not the answer for most people, or even possbile, but just over a year ago I began to home educate my daughter and the change is marked now she is not using all her 'spoons' to deal with copng with large numbers of people she can and does want to socilaize - on her own terms. she is more likely to chat on line with friends that she also meets up or has round now than play the same computer games or just watch her DVDs (and has had two major meltdowns in one year since I took her out of school), She didn't have any firends or want any and rejected fgirls that tried to befriend her while at school. Try to remember your teen is surrounded by too many noisy NTs all day and once removed from the situation will find and make friends on their own terms, so things will improve once they are older. I would also recommend 'Freaks, Geeks and Aspergers' by an Aspie teen Luke Jackson. And don't ever expect a teen with autism to ever socialize as much as NT one, they just won't want to, however many social skills workshops and classes they may have attended, their brain is just wired up differently. If they are unhappy with the situation a club or on line chat room around an interst will give then a shaed interest as a beginning to make friends.
•    Anonymous said... Like minded kids help as they're all into similar stuff like minecraft and strategy games or top trumps etc. My lad has 1 firm friend and that's enough. When I was younger I had a few friends -and that's all I wanted. The depression came from deep thought (usually depressing and confusing when you start to wonder how you were born without your own say-so ) or getting worn down with constant punishment for untidy/careless work, arguing with teachers as if you are their peer or forgetting homework/equipment (anything you think is unimportant to you rly) My own insights usually help me deal with my son apart from when I'm in the moment picking at details in an argument - Then I'm just as bad as he is ! I wonder if this rings true with anyone else.. if so maybe I should write my own book Hehe.
•    Anonymous said... Mine same but 17yr son. He only has one year of school. I'm trying to get every day filled with at least one outdoor activity. He only has a 3 day week @ school so the other days he has voluntary work for a few hours a day,
•    Anonymous said... my daughter does sims all day!!! Also depressed, nearly 13 now, very similar from what you write, we are going through tough times right now...
•    Anonymous said... My daughter is depressed.... No enthusiasm for living, for doing things or making contact with others; she must be very self critical whilst comparing herself to other girls of her age who seem to be living without a care... at times she stays in her bed playing on ipad.. just like the other Aspies. So sad to watch.   
•    Anonymous said... Do your research and find a social skill activity program. Have him volunteer. Limit the video time, offer comic books or graphic novels as an alternative.
•    Anonymous said... Find a HFA support group where he can connect with kids like him. My 8 year old has the same issue. If we let him he would play video games all day but we have him in sports. He is a diver. He still struggles with social aspects but he is learning! Get him out and sooner the better
•    Anonymous said... I have the exact same issue with my 16 year old son. He doesn't accept his diagnosis, never has, and there is no way he would let me take him to a social group of similar kids..ughh
•    Anonymous said... My almost 16yr old is/was exactly the same (except now works instead of school).. Went through months of deep depression , is only coming out of it now.. I think backing off too much pressure helped my son ALOT, he also did not want to join social groups/outings still doesn't. It breaks your heart as a mum to watch them sit in their room or on computer with no friends, but to be honest, he tells me he is happier doing that than being forced out being made to be sociable. I think they all eventually find their feet, grow into their own skin, however you want to put it.. But by me always showing I was there for him and as said previously, taking the pressure off him, he is beginning to show signs of being happy once again . If you ever need a chat, please message me, I completely understand your concern and heartbreak xx
•    Anonymous said... My son is thirteen, doesn't like sports and he also doesn't accept a label. It's a daily challenge coaxing him away from screens. In order to keep screen time, he is required to have a daily set amount of social time with the family. My son says has made many friendly connections through his video games.

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Part 12: Teaching Strategies for Students with Asperger’s and High-Functioning Autism – Emotional Vulnerability

Kids with Asperger’s (AS) and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) have the intelligence to participate in regular education, but they often do not have the emotional resources to cope with the demands of the classroom. These “special needs” kids are easily stressed due to their inflexibility. Self-esteem is low, and they are often very self-critical and unable to tolerate making mistakes.

Young people with AS and HFA, especially teenagers, may be prone to depression (as a side note, a high percentage of depression in grown-ups with AS and HFA has been documented). Rage and temper outbursts are common in response to stress and frustration.

Kids with AS and HFA rarely seem relaxed and are easily overwhelmed when things are not as their rigid views dictate they should be. Interacting with peers and school staff – and coping with the ordinary demands of everyday life take constant strenuous effort.

==> Teaching Students with Aspergers and HFA

Programming Suggestions for Teachers:

1. Teachers must be alert to changes in behavior that may indicate depression (e.g., greater levels of disorganization, inattentiveness, isolation, decreased stress threshold, chronic fatigue, crying, suicidal remarks, etc.). Do not accept the youngster's assessment in these cases that he is "OK."

2. Teach the AS or HFA student how to cope when stress overwhelms her in order to prevent outbursts. Help the youngster write a list of very concrete steps that can be followed when she becomes upset (e.g., breathe deeply three times; count the fingers on your right hand slowly three times; ask to see the special education teacher, etc.). Include a ritualized behavior that the youngster finds comforting on the list. Write these steps on a card that is placed in the pocket so that they are always readily available.

3. Report symptoms to the youngster's therapist or make a mental health referral so that the youngster can be evaluated for depression and receive treatment if this is needed. Because AS and HFA kids are often unable to assess their own emotions and can’t seek comfort from others, it is critical that depression be diagnosed quickly.

4. Kids with AS and HFA are so easily overwhelmed by environmental stressors and have such profound impairment in the ability to form interpersonal relationships that it is no wonder they give the impression of fragile vulnerability and immaturity. When these “special needs” youngsters are compared to their “typical” peers, it becomes very evident just how different they are and the enormous effort they have to make to live in a world where no concessions are made and where they are expected to conform.

5. Prevent outbursts by offering a high level of consistency. Prepare these kids for changes in daily routine in order to lower stress. Kids on the autism spectrum frequently become fearful, angry, and upset in the face of forced or unexpected changes.

6. AS and HFA kids who are very fragile emotionally may need placement in a highly structured special education classroom that can offer an individualized academic program. These kids require a learning environment in which they see themselves as competent and productive. Accordingly, keeping them in the mainstream where they can’t grasp concepts or complete assignments serves only to lower their self-concept, increase their withdrawal, and set the stage for depression. In some situations, a personal aide can be assigned to the youngster rather than special education placement. The aide offers emotional support, structure and consistent feedback.

7. Kids with AS and HFA must receive academic assistance as soon as difficulties in a particular area are noted. These kids are quickly overwhelmed and react much more severely to failure than do other kids.

8. It is critical that teenagers with AS and HFA who are mainstreamed have an identified support staff member with whom they can check-in at least once daily. This person can assess how well the student is coping by meeting with him daily and gathering observations from other teachers.

==> Teaching Students with Aspergers and HFA

9. Be aware that teenagers with AS and HFA are especially prone to depression. Social skills are highly valued in the teenage years, and the AS or HFA student realizes she is different and has difficulty forming normal relationships. Academic work often becomes more abstract, and the teen finds assignments more difficult and complex. In one case, teachers noted that an AS teen was no longer crying over math assignments, and therefore believed that she was coping much better. In reality, her subsequent decreased organization and productivity in math was believed to be a function of her escaping further into her inner world to avoid the math, and thus she was not coping well at all.

10. Affect as reflected in the teacher's voice should be kept to a minimum. Be calm, predictable, and matter-of-fact in interactions with the AS or HFA youngster while clearly indicating compassion and patience. The teacher who does not understand that it is necessary to teach AS and HFA kids seemingly obvious things will feel impatient and irritated. Do not expect the “special needs” youngster to acknowledge that he is sad or depressed. In the same way that they can’t perceive the emotions of others, these kids can also be unaware of their own emotions. They often cover up their depression and deny its symptoms.

Teachers can play a vital role in helping kids with AS and HFA learn to negotiate the world around them. Because these kids are frequently unable to express their fears and anxieties, it is up to caring adults to make it worthwhile for them to leave their safe inner fantasy lives for the uncertainties of the external world.

Staff who work with these youngsters in schools must provide the external structure, organization, and stability that they lack. Using creative teaching strategies is crucial, not only to facilitate academic success, but also to help these young people feel less alienated from other human beings and less overwhelmed by the ordinary demands of everyday life.

==> Teaching Students with Aspergers and HFA


COMMENTS:

•    Anonymous said…  you are not alone!"Just keep swimming..."
•    Anonymous said… Absolutely spot on in relation to my 10 year old son.. & worthwhile sharing with his school!
•    Anonymous said… Absolutely spot on. How I've described my son and why I moved him to a school which actively seeks to get the best from him every day, without the mainstream inadequacies. He has gone from strength to strength.
•    Anonymous said… Absolutely...my 16 year old is dealing with a chaotic class right now. He has not failed a class ever but is on the verge. He is begging to be switched out, so we are pushing the admin to allow him to move.
•    Anonymous said… Every time I read " depression" next to "mainstream", I hardly believe that school officials would be accommodating or patient enough to deal with emotional HFA child. I suspect they'll just drop it on the clinical psychologist laps to avoid liabilities.
•    Anonymous said… I just started homeschooling my 11 year old girl. I don't know what took me so long! Five years of banging my head against the wall of the public school system. What was I waiting for??
•    Anonymous said… I'm thinking about pulling my 10 year old 4th grader from Public School!!! Same as you both, I'm mad at myself for letting him suffer this long.
•    Anonymous said… It's a fear thing. If I didn't have the K12 program I don't think I would have the guts to do it yet.
•    Anonymous said… Mine is in her thirties. I had to fight with the school almost constantly (and college was no picnic neither). She lacks one class from having an Associate's Degree. She lacks a science class because we just could not find a science class instructor who really cared to do any modification at all. She did have a "special populations" counselor at the college and that did help to an extent (but not when it came to the science dept ... ironic how ignorant they are). The modification would have been minor (although it is not a minor issue when not put into place) and she is, of course, expected to complete the workload and pass the exams just like everyone else. I am almost sixty. My husband just retired and I am totally burnt out. At least she does have three technology degrees from the college (and she definitely EARNED them). However, she is a grocery store clerk and has not found a job in her chosen field ... kind of doubtful (although hopeful) that she someday will. I feel like I fought with the school district the entire time she was growing up. They did not seem to understand what autism is at the time she attended school .... much less that there are different levels of autism. They tried to label her MR, but I resisted. They said that they did not have a program for autism. I told them that they were ACQUIRING one! She was mainstreamed, because I insisted. Sure, there were bullies .... both children AND adults. However, there were some of the most wonderful people .... both children AND adults .... who came to her aid at times. And, yes, I did have to go to the school and make the school officials confront the bullies. I had to actually threaten the school district with a law suit one time because the prinipical did not want to contront the bullies who were htting my child by the lockers. The principal stated that she could not punish the bullies as she did not witness the abuse. I countered that comment with the fact that she could "call them on the carpet and put them on notice" and tell them and their parents what she had heard about their behavior. Fortunately, this was resolved ..... however, it was totally inappropriate on the school's part that I had to take such measures to protect my child. I realize that I have rambled on, but this is a small slice of our experience. It seems that it is an uphill battle, but, although burnt out, I am glad that I fought. It still is not ideal. She lives with us and the government does not give her any type of check (as some people probably think). Her father and I have always been working class people. Lol ... the government relies on people like us to support welfare with the taxes they take from our paychecks. Our daughter takes care of very basic things with her part-time job money. She cannot afford to pay rent, so she lives with us. (Not many people are catagoried as "full-time" in the grocery store). She did qualify for "Obama-Care" so at least she has some type of coverage. We live in Texas (that probably explains part of it anyway).
•    Anonymous said… So incredibly timely for me as my 13 yo ASD son is struggling with school. I will be sharing this with this school. They have been wonderful in working with him.
•    Anonymous said… So very true. My son calls high school - social hell.
•    Anonymous said… Thank you for posting. I am going to pass this on to my daughters principal.
•    Anonymous said… That describes my child so well!
•    Anonymous said… That's why I homeschool my oldest for right now. When I have tried communicating his needs before we started school they seemed like they didn't want to help at all.
•    Anonymous said… The school structure just didn't fit him- so much stress from transitions, unexpected changes, assemblies, substitutes and rule changes. He would fall behind and only two teachers tried to do anything. He is homeschooling this year and is doing fantastic and also making friends!
•    Anonymous said… This is so spot on! Hand this to all of your Aspie's teachers!
•    Anonymous said… this is what I was talking to u about...
•    Anonymous said… Very helpful!
•    Anonymous said… We pulled our son from the public system in the 5th grade and enrolled him in a mainstream, small private school where he does much better socially...but it still isn't perfect. He does not require a special needs school, but he does require specialized care at times. I really wish there were more options out there for these high functioning, quirky kids.
•    Anonymous said… Yay! The BEST description of my son!
*  Anonymous said... This was my son to a T, and despite lawyers, advocates, etc. we never got him the support he really needed in school. Barriers included many teachers' unwillingness or inability to believe that this very bright, verbal, gifted and often funny kid was so significantly affected by this hidden disability; my son's unwillingness to have supports/accommodations that singled him out as "different;" and the fact that by the time he got diagnosed he already had full-blown depression as well as (I believe) PTSD from all the stress of the first 7 years of his schooling, and from being blamed for all his own problems by almost everyone. I really hope this information is passed along and helps others.....If you suspect your child may have special needs, do not put off going to a specialist!! Our pediatrician was treating him for ADHD all those years and even when he was getting in trouble in school no one suggested further testing until I got him to the right therapist. 

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Oppositional Defiant Behavior in Children and Teens with Aspergers Syndrome

The American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fourth Edition (DSM IV), defines oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) as a recurrent pattern of negativistic, defiant, disobedient, and hostile behavior toward authority figures that persists for at least 6 months. Behaviors included in the definition include the following:

• actively defying requests
• arguing with adults
• being touchy, easily annoyed or angered, resentful, spiteful, or vindictive.
• blaming others for one's own mistakes or misbehavior
• deliberately annoying other people
• losing one's temper
• refusing to follow rules

OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER is usually diagnosed when an Aspergers youngster has a persistent or consistent pattern of disobedience and hostility toward parents, teachers, or other adults. The primary behavioral difficulty is the consistent pattern of refusing to follow commands or requests by adults. Aspergers kids with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER are often easily annoyed; they repeatedly lose their temper, argue with adults, refuse to comply with rules and directions, and blame others for their mistakes. Stubbornness and testing limits are common, even in early childhood.

The criteria for OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER are met only when the problem behaviors occur more frequently in the Aspergers youngster than in other Aspergers kids of the same age and developmental level. These behaviors cause significant difficulties with family and friends, and the oppositional behaviors are the same both at home and in school. Sometimes, OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER may be a precursor of a conduct disorder. OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER is not diagnosed if the problematic behaviors occur exclusively with a mood or psychotic disorder.

Prevalence and Comorbidity—

The base prevalence rates for oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) range from 1-16%, but most surveys estimate it to be 6-10% in surveys of nonclinical, non-referred samples of parents' reports. In more stringent population samples, rates are lower when impairment criteria are stricter and when the information is obtained from both parents and teachers, rather than from moms and dads only. Before puberty, the condition is more common in boys; after puberty, it is almost exclusively identified in boys, and whether the criteria are applicable to girls has been discussed. The disorder usually manifests by age 8 years. OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER and other conduct problems are the single greatest reasons for referrals to outpatient and inpatient mental health settings for kids, accounting for at least half of all referrals.

Diagnosis is complicated by relatively high rates of comorbid, disruptive, behavior disorders. Some symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and conduct disorder overlap. Researchers have postulated that, in some kids, OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER may be the developmental precursor of conduct disorder. Comorbidity of OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER with ADHD has been reported to occur in 50-65% of affected kids.

In some Aspergers kids, OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER commonly occurs in conjunction with anxiety disorders and depressive disorders. Cross-sectional surveys have revealed the comorbidity of OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER with an affective disorder in about 35% of cases, with rates of comorbidity increasing with patient age. High rates of comorbidity are also found among ODDs, learning disorders, and academic difficulties. Given these findings, kids with significant oppositional and defiant behaviors often require multidisciplinary assessment and may need components of mental health care, case management, and educational intervention to improve.

Risk Factors and Etiology—

The best available data indicate that no single cause or main effect results in oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). Most experts believe that biological factors are important in OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER and that familial clustering of certain disruptive disorders, including OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER and ADHD, substance abuse, and mood disorders, occurs.

Studies of the genetics of OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER have produced mixed results. Under-arousal to stimulation has been consistently found in persistently aggressive and delinquent youth and in those with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER. Exogenous factors such as prenatal exposure to toxins, alcohol, and poor nutrition all seem to have effects, but findings are inconsistent. Studies have implicated abnormalities in the prefrontal cortex; altered neurotransmitter function in the serotonergic, noradrenergic, and dopaminergic systems; and low cortisol and elevated testosterone levels.

Clinical Course—

In Aspergers toddlers, temperamental factors, such as irritability, impulsivity, and intensity of reactions to negative stimuli, may contribute to the development of a pattern of oppositional and defiant behaviors in later childhood. Family instability, including economic stress, parental mental illness, harshly punitive behaviors, inconsistent parenting practices, multiple moves, and divorce, may also contribute to the development of oppositional and defiant behaviors.

The interactions of an Aspergers youngster who has a difficult temperament and irritable behavior with moms and dads who are harsh, punitive, and inconsistent usually lead to a coercive, negative cycle of behavior in the family. In this pattern, the youngster's defiant behavior tends to intensify the parents' harsh reactions. The moms and dads respond to misbehavior with threats of punishment that are inconsistently applied. When the parent punishes the youngster, the youngster learns to respond to threats. When the parent fails to punish the youngster, the youngster learns that he or she does not have to comply. Research indicates that these patterns are established early, in the youngster's preschool years; left untreated, pattern development accelerates, and patterns worsen.

Developmentally, the presenting problems change with the Aspergers youngster's age. For example, younger kids are more likely to engage in oppositional and defiant behavior, whereas older kids are more likely to engage in more covert behavior such as stealing.

By the time they are school aged, Aspergers kids with patterns of oppositional behavior tend to express their defiance with teachers and other adults and exhibit aggression toward their peers. As kids with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) progress in school, they experience increasing peer rejection due to their poor social skills and aggression. These kids may be more likely to misinterpret their peers' behavior as hostile, and they lack the skills to solve social conflicts. In problem situations, kids with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER are more likely to resort to aggressive physical actions rather than verbal responses. Kids with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER and poor social skills often do not recognize their role in peer conflicts; they blame their peers (e.g., "He made me hit him.") and usually fail to take responsibility for their own actions.

The following 3 classes of behavior are hallmarks of both oppositional and conduct problems:

1. emotional overreaction to life events, no matter how small
2. failure to take responsibility for one's own actions
3. noncompliance with commands

When behavioral difficulties are present beginning in the preschool period, teachers and families may overlook significant deficiencies in the youngster's learning and academic performance. When many Aspergers kids with behavioral problems and academic problems are placed in the same classroom, the risk for continued behavioral and academic problems increases. OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER behavior may escalate and result in serious antisocial actions that, when sufficiently frequent and severe, become criteria to change the diagnosis to conduct disorder. Milder forms of OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER in some kids spontaneously remit over time. More severe forms of OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER, in which many symptoms are present in the toddler years and continually worsen after the youngster is aged 5 years, may evolve into conduct disorder in older kids and adolescents.

Treatment—

Given the high probability that oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) occurs alongside attention disorders, learning disorders, and conduct disturbances, an evaluation for these disorders is indicated for comprehensive treatment. Pharmacologic treatment (e.g., stimulant medication) for ADHD may be beneficial once this is diagnosed. Aspergers kids with oppositional behavior in the school setting should undergo necessary screening testing in school to evaluate for possible learning disabilities. With the multifaceted nature of associated problems in OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER, comprehensive treatment may include medication, parenting and family therapy, and consultation with the school staff. If kids with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER are found to have ADHD as well, appropriate treatment of ADHD may help them to restore their focus and attention and decrease their impulsivity; such treatment may enable their social and behavioral interventions to be more effective.

Parent management training (PMT) is recommended for families of Aspergers kids with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER because it has been demonstrated to affect negative interactions that repeatedly occur between the kids and their moms and dads. PMT consists of procedures in which parents are trained to change their own behaviors and thereby alter their youngster's problem behavior in the home. PMT is based on 35 years of well-developed research showing that oppositional and defiant patterns arise from maladaptive parent-child interactions that start in early childhood.

These patterns develop when moms and dads inadvertently reinforce disruptive and deviant behaviors in a youngster by giving those behaviors a significant amount of negative attention. At the same time, the parents, who are often exhausted by the struggle to obtain compliance with simple requests, usually fail to provide positive attention; often, the moms and dads have infrequent positive interactions with their kids. The pattern of negative interactions evolves quickly as the result of repeated, ineffective, emotionally expressed commands and comments; ineffective harsh punishments; and insufficient attention and modeling of appropriate behaviors.

PMT alters the pattern by encouraging the parent to pay attention to prosocial behavior and to use effective, brief, non-aversive punishments. Treatment is conducted primarily with the moms and dads; the therapist demonstrates specific procedures to modify parental interactions with their youngster. Moms and dads are first trained to simply have periods of positive play interaction with their youngster. They then receive further training to identify the youngster's positive behaviors and to reinforce these behaviors. At that point, parents are trained in the use of brief negative consequences for misbehavior. Treatment sessions provide the moms and dads with opportunities to practice and refine the techniques.

Follow-up studies of operational PMT techniques in which moms and dads successfully modified their behavior showed continued improvements for years after the treatment was finished. Treatment effects have been stronger with younger kids, especially in those with less severe problems. Recent research suggests that less severe problems, rather than a younger patient age, is predictive of treatment success. Approximately 65% of families show significant clinical benefit from well-designed parent management programs.

Regardless of the Aspergers youngster's age, intervention early in the developing pattern of oppositional behavior is likely to be more effective than waiting for the youngster to grow out of it. These kids can benefit from group treatment. The process of modeling behaviors and reactions within group settings creates a real-life adaptation process. In younger kids, combined treatment in which moms and dads attend a PMT group while the kids go to a social skills group has consistently resulted in the best outcome. The efficacy of group treatment of adolescents with oppositional behaviors has been debated. Group therapy for adolescents with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER is most beneficial when it is structured and focused on developing the skills of listening, empathy, and effective problem solving.

Obstacles to Treatment—

Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD), and other conduct problems, can be intractable. Despite advances in treatment, many Aspergers kids continue to have long-term negative sequelae. PMT requires parental cooperation and effort for success. Existing psychiatric conditions in the moms and dads can be a major obstacle to effective treatment. Depression in a parent, particularly the mother, can prevent successful intervention with the youngster and become worse if the youngster's behavior is out of control. Substance abuse and other more severe psychiatric conditions can adversely affect parenting skills, and these conditions are particularly problematic for the moms and dads of a youngster with OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANT DISORDER.

In situations in which the moms and dads lack the resources to effectively manage their Aspergers youngster, services can be obtained through schools or county mental health agencies. Many states have effective "wrap around" services, which include a full-day school program and home-based therapy services to maintain progress in the home setting. Thus, effective treatment can include resources from several agencies, and coordination is critical. If county mental health or school special education services are involved, one person is usually designated to coordinate services in those systems.


My Aspergers Child: Parent Management Training (PMT) for Parents with Defiant Aspergers Children


Keywords—
• Aspergers and ADHD
• Aspergers and antisocial actions
• Aspergers and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder
• Aspergers and conduct disorder
• Aspergers and defiant behavior
• Aspergers and defiant disorder
• Aspergers and disruptive behavior
• Aspergers and harshly punitive behaviors
• Aspergers and hostile behavior
• Aspergers and impulsivity
• Aspergers and irritability
• Aspergers and learning disorders
• Aspergers and maladaptive parent-child interactions
• Aspergers and noncompliance with commands
• Aspergers and ODD
• Aspergers and oppositional defiant disorder
• Aspergers and overreaction to life events
• Aspergers and parent management training
• Aspergers and peer rejection
• Aspergers and stubbornness
• Aspergers defiant disorder
• Aspergers negativistic behavior

Parenting Teenagers on the Autism Spectrum: Double Trouble?

Most experts do a great job of presenting the problems children with Asperger’s (AS) and High Functioning Autistic (HFA) face during their adolescent years, yet they offer few solutions. The years from twelve to seventeen may be the saddest and most difficult time for these young people. 

This is not true of every adolescent on the autism spectrum, though. Some do extremely well. Their indifference to what others think makes them indifferent to the intense peer pressure of adolescence. They can flourish within their specialty, and become accomplished musicians, historians, mathematicians, etc.

"Special needs" adolescents typically become more isolated socially during a period when they crave friendships and inclusion more than ever. In the cruel world of middle and high school, AS and HFA teens often face rejection, isolation and bullying. Meanwhile, school becomes more demanding in a period when they have to compete for college placements. Issues of sexuality and a desire for independence from moms and dads create even more problems.

Common issues to consider include:

Criminal Activity— Pain, loneliness and despair can lead to problems with drugs, sex and alcohol. In their overwhelming need to fit in and make friends, some AS and HFA teens fall into the wrong high school crowds. Adolescents who abuse substances will use the AS or HFA teen’s naivety to get him to buy or carry drugs and liquor for their group. If cornered by a police officer, a teenager on the autism spectrum usually does not have the skill to answer the officer’s questions appropriately. For example, if the officer says, “Do you know how fast you were driving?” a teenager on the spectrum may reply bluntly, “Yes,” and thus appears to be a smart-aleck.

Depression and Acting Out— The teenage years are more emotional for everyone. Yet the hormonal changes of adolescence coupled with the problems outlined above might mean that an AS or HFA adolescent becomes emotionally overwhelmed. Childish tantrums reappear. Boys often act up by physically attacking a teacher or peer. They may experience “melt down” at home after another day filled with harassment, bullying, pressure to conform, and rejection. Suicide and drug addiction become real concerns, as the adolescent now has access to cars, drugs and alcohol. The “saddest and most difficult time” can overwhelm not only the AS or HFA adolescent, but also his family.

==> Discipline for Defiant Aspergers & High-Functioning Autistic Teens

Inability to “Be an Adolescent”— An AS or HFA teen typically does not care about adolescent fads and clothing styles - concerns that obsess everyone else in their peer group. These teens may neglect their hygiene and wear the same haircut for years. Boys forget to shave; girls don't comb their hair or follow fashion. Some remain stuck in a grammar school clothes and hobbies such as unicorns and Legos, instead of moving into adolescent concerns like Facebook and dating. Boys on the autism spectrum often have no motor coordination. This leaves them out of high school sports, typically an essential area of male bonding and friendship.

School Failures— Many AS and HFA teens with their average to above average IQs can sail through grammar school, and yet hit academic problems in middle and high school. They now have to deal with four to six teachers, instead of just one. The likelihood that at least one teacher will be indifferent or even hostile toward making special accommodations is certain. The AS or HFA student now has to face a series of classroom environments with different classmates, odors, distractions and noise levels, and sets of expectations. AS and HFA teens with their distractibility and difficulty organizing materials face similar academic problems as students with Attention Deficit Disorder. A high school term paper or a science fair project becomes impossible to manage because no one has taught the AS or HFA teen how to break it up into a series of small steps. Even though the academic stress on the adolescent can be overwhelming, school administrators may be reluctant to enroll him in special education at this late point in his educational career.

Sexual Issues— Adolescents on the spectrum are not privy to street knowledge of sex and dating behaviors that other adolescents pick up naturally. This leaves them naive and clueless about sex. Boys can become obsessed with Internet pornography and masturbation. They can be overly forward with a girl who is merely being kind, and then later face charges of stalking her. An AS or HFA adolescent may have a fully developed female body and no understanding of flirtation and non-verbal sexual cues, making her susceptible to harassment and even date rape.

Social Isolation— In the teenage world where everyone feels insecure, adolescents that appear different are voted off the island. AS and HFA teens often have odd mannerisms. One adolescent talks in a loud un-modulated voice, avoids eye contact, interrupts others, violates their physical space, and steers the conversation to her favorite odd topic. Another appears willful, selfish and aloof, mostly because he is unable to share his thoughts and feelings with others. Isolated and alone, many are too anxious to initiate social contact. Many \ adolescents on the spectrum are stiff and rule-oriented and act like little adults, which is a deadly trait in any teenage popularity contest. Friendship and all its nuances of reciprocity can be exhausting for an AS or HFA teenager, even though she wants it more than anything else. One girl ended a close friendship with this note: “Your expectations exhaust me. The phone calls, the girl talks, all your feelings...it's just too much for me. I can't take it anymore.”

How Moms and Dads Can Help Adolescents with Asperger’s and High Functioning Autism—

Moms and dads of adolescents on the autism spectrum face many problems that others moms and dads do not. Time is running out for teaching their “special needs” teenager how to become an independent adult. As one mother put it, “There's so little time, and so much left to do.” They face issues such as vocational training, teaching independent living, and providing lifetime financial support for their child, if necessary.

Meanwhile, their immature teen is often indifferent or even hostile to these concerns. Once an AS or HFA child enters the teen years, his mom and dad have to use reasoning and negotiation, instead of providing direction. Like all teenagers, he is harder to control and less likely to listen to his moms and dads. He may be tired of parents nagging him to look people in their eyes, brush his teeth, and wake up in time for school. He may hate school because he is dealing with social ostracism or academic failure there.

==> Discipline for Defiant Aspergers & High-Functioning Autistic Teens

Here are some ways that moms and dads of adolescents with AS and HFA deal with common issues:

Appearance— Because of their sensitivity to textures, AS and HFA teens often wear the same clothes day in and day out. This is unacceptable in middle or high school. One idea that has worked for some moms and dads is to find an adolescent of the same age and sex as yours, and then enlist that person help you choose clothes that will enable your child to blend in with other adolescents. Insist that your adolescent practices good hygiene every day.

Driving— Most AS and HFA teens can learn to drive, but their process may take longer because of their poor motor coordination. Once they learn a set of rules, they are likely to follow them to the letter - a trait that helps in driving. However, they may have trouble dealing with unexpected situations on the road. Have your child carry a cell phone and give him a printed card that explains AS and HFA. Teach him to give the card to a police officer and phone you in a crisis.

Drugs and Alcohol— Alcoholic drinks or drugs often react adversely with your child’s prescriptions, so you have to teach your child about these dangers. Since most AS and HFA teens are very rule-oriented, try emphasizing that drugs and alcohol are illegal.

Life after High School— If your adolescent is college-bound, you have to prepare her for the experience. You can plan a trip to the campus, and show her where to buy books, where the health services are, and so forth. Teach her how to handle everyday problems such as “Where do you buy deodorant?” “What if you oversleep and miss a class?” As you prepare your adolescent for the workforce, keep in mind that people with AS and HFA often do not understand office politics. They have problems with the basics, such as handling criticism, controlling emotions, showing up on time, and working with the public. This does not mean they cannot hold down a job. Once they master certain aspects of employment, these young people are often able to work at high levels as accountants, research scientists, computer programmers, and so forth.

School— If the pressure on your child to conform is too great, if she faces constant harassment and rejection, if your principal and teaching staff do not cooperate with you, it may be time to find another school. The adolescent years are often when many moms and dads decide it is in their child’s best interest to enter special education or a therapeutic boarding school. In a boarding school, professionals guide your child academically and socially on a twenty-four-hour basis. They do not allow boys to isolate themselves with video games - everyone has to participate in social activities. A counseling staff helps with college placements. If you decide to work within a public-school system, you may have to hire a lawyer to get needed services. Your child should have an Individual Education Plan and accommodations for the learning disabled. This may mean placement in small classes, tutors, and special arrangements for gym and lunchtime. He should receive extra time for college board examinations. Teach your child to find a “safe place” at school where he can share emotions with a trusted professional. The safe place may be the offices of school nurse, guidance counselor, or psychologist.

Sex— You absolutely have to teach your “special needs” adolescent about sex. You will not be able to “talk around” the issue: you will have to be specific and detailed about safe sex, and teach your child to tell you about inappropriate touching by others. Your child may need remedial “sex education.” For example, a girl needs to understand she is too old to sit on laps or give hugs to strangers. A boy might have to learn to close toilet stall doors and masturbate only in private.

Social Life— When she was little, you could arrange play dates for her. Now you have to teach her how to initiate contact with others. Teach her how to leave phone messages and arrange details of social contacts such as transportation. Encourage her to join high school clubs like chess or drama. It is not necessary to tell her peers that she has a disorder - let her do that herself. Many adolescents on the autism spectrum are enjoying each other's company through Internet chat rooms, forums and message boards.

Summer and Part-Time Jobs— Most of these jobs - movie usher, fast food worker, store clerk, etc. - involve interaction with the public. This means they are not always a good fit for an adolescent with the disorder. Some AS and HFA teens can find work in their field of special interest, or in jobs that have little interpersonal interaction. Other adolescents have spent joyful summers at camps designed for adolescents like them.

More resources for parents of children and teens on the autism spectrum:
 

==> How to Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting System that Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Launching Adult Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social-Skills and Emotion-Management to Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Parents' Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling the Mystery Behind High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book

==> Crucial Research-Based Parenting Strategies for Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism