How do you get the school system to pay attention to an Aspergers child when his academic functioning is normal to advanced?

When they look at disabilities, some schools expect the student to be in a wheelchair or intellectually disabled. They seem not to understand a student who is a wiz at math, computers, etc., but is socially somewhat “weird.” The first reaction is that it has something to do with the parents, and that they obviously haven't raised the youngster properly.

After an Aspergers (high functioning autism) child has been diagnosed at the clinic, I will go to the school and meet with school officials. I explain to the teachers (a) what Aspergers is, (b) how the student expresses the Aspergers symptoms, (c) their abilities, and (d) some of the do's and don'ts. For example:

• He is very honest, and many of the children with Aspergers will tell you your mistakes. So when he stands up in front of the class and says, "You've missed a comma there," he's not being rude or disruptive.
• Just because he's not looking, is not to say he's not listening.
• Sarcasm isn't going to work.
• When they do their homework, make sure they are on the right track.
• You've got to make sure that the student understands the concepts talked about.

Not only do we have meetings with teachers for such children, we also have training programs for the teachers’ aides so that they can understand such children. We also now have a "good school guide," and some moms/dads will actually move so that their kids can attend certain schools that have a history of doing well with Aspergers students. And, we do training programs for moms and dads on how to relate to teachers. The schools now are less ignorant, less fearful of such students, and have better structure for helping them.

First, you have got to get the Education Department to understand Aspergers in its policy and it's training, but you've also got to work with many individual teachers to educate them on what to do exactly. Children with Aspergers either get on wonderfully - or terribly - with their educators. It's a disaster for both parties if you're not careful. You need to support the teacher, and help him/her understand the Aspergers condition. There are certain schools that have more than their fare share of Aspergers students, because moms/dads have voted with their feet and moved to those schools.

You are an expert on your youngster and on his personality and developmental history. Use your gut reaction to know whether that's an appropriate school. If your senses are uncomfortable, don't go! If you feel relaxed and comfortable, your Aspergers youngster will probably be relaxed and comfortable in that environment. Work with the teachers by educating them for future success – not by correcting them for past mistakes.

Here's a helpful guide for both parents and teachers: Teaching Students with Aspergers and HFA

Girls with Aspergers

Do girls with Aspergers experience the same symptoms as boys?

The male to female ratio for referrals for a diagnostic assessment is about 10 males to each 1 female. However, the epidemiological evidence indicates the ratio is 4:1. This is the same ratio as occurs with Autism.

So far there have not been any studies that specifically investigate any variation in expression of features between males and females with Aspergers, but males tend to have a greater expression of social deficits with a very uneven profile of social skills and a propensity for disruptive or aggressive behavior, especially when frustrated or stressed. These characteristics are more likely to be noticed by moms/dads and educators who then seek advice as to why the youngster is unusual.

In contrast, females tend to be relatively more able in social play and have a more even profile of social skills. Females with Aspergers seem more able to follow social actions by delayed imitation. They observe the other kids and copy them, but their actions are not as well timed and spontaneous. There is some preliminary evidence to substantiate this distinction from a study of sex differences in Autism.

Females with this Aspergers are more likely to be considered immature rather than odd. Their special interests may not be as conspicuous and intense as occurs with males. Thus, they can be described as the "invisible" youngster (i.e., socially isolated), preoccupied by their imaginary world, but not a disruptive influence in the classroom. Although females are less likely to be diagnosed, they are more likely to suffer in silence.

An important issue for females is that during adolescence the usual basis for friendship changes. Instead of joint play with toys and games using imagination, teen friendship is based on conversation that is predominantly about experiences, relationships and feelings. The female teen with Aspergers may want to continue the playground games of the primary school and starts to reduce her contact with previous friends. They no longer share the same interests. There is also the new problem of coping with the amorous advances of teen males. Here conversation is acceptable, but concepts of romance and love as well as physical intimacy are confusing or objectionable.

In an attempt to be included in social activities, some Aspergers females have described how they have deliberately adopted a "mask-like” quality to their face. To others at school, they seem to continuously express a smile - but behind the mask – they are experiencing anxiety, fear and self doubt. They are desperate to be included and to please others, but cannot express their inner feelings in public.

Females with the classic signs of Aspergers in their primary school years usually progress along the Autism/Aspergers continuum to a point where the current diagnostic criteria are no longer sensitive to the more subtle problems they face. These females have a better long-term prognosis than males. They appear to be more able to learn how to socialize and to camouflage their difficulties at an early age.

More resources for parents of children and teens with High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's:

==> How To Prevent Meltdowns and Tantrums In Children With High-Functioning Autism and Asperger's

==> Parenting System that Significantly Reduces Defiant Behavior in Teens with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism

==> Launching Adult Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Guide for Parents Who Want to Promote Self-Reliance

==> Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Children and Teens with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

==> Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: Comprehensive Handbook

==> Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: Audio Book


==> Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children with Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism