How to Reduce Aggression in Aspergers Children: 12 Tips for Parents

Kids with Aspergers seem to evoke either the maternal or the predatory instinct in others. Aspies often lack subtlety in retaliating. Other kids may wait for an appropriate moment to respond without being caught. The youngster with Aspergers can also lack sufficient empathy and self-control to moderate the degree of injury inflicted on others. The Aspie is in a blind fury that gets him into trouble. The teacher sees the Aspergers youngster being aggressive and may not be aware of the taunts by his peers that precipitated the anger.

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Comments

Anonymous said…
I have a 12 year old boy who was diagnosed with aspergers 5-6 years ago. Recently when we were having our regular meeting with our child psychologist who specializes with aspergers children my wide and I raised that maybe I also had some form of aspergers. I ran through some psychological / IQ test with the pschologist and the results indicated that I am probably on the spectrum . I must admit after the years of reading my wife and I have done on aspergers I already had a good feeling that I was on the spectrum. Unfortunately having a parent and child with aspergers creates problems. I find my tolerance for his behavior is low. I also find my anxiety levels start to rise when he is acting up with his younger siblings or is just not doing he is being told. Once my anxiety levels go up I begin shouting out him and physically forcing him to do what I have asked him to do. He then starts screaming and swearing at me. My wife tells me I need to know how to deal with him without creating world war three every time. I must admit I sometimes feel my anxiety levels going through the roof when he won't accept 'no' for an answer. He just keeps going on and on and on- I have made the comment to my wife once that it feels like Chinese water torture. So I guess sometimes I just crack and again world war three starts. I do take 20mg of a tablet called eleva to help with my anxiety levels. Both my wife and I are worried about what type of relationship my son and I are going to have if I can't resolve this constant anger between us.
May 15, 2011 at 6:40 AM
Anonymous said…
Karen Gomez Vega thanks, this is very helpful. we have had a really bad week and this will serve to help for next week along with some new medication (which was the hardest thing i have ever done).
17 hours ago · Like
Tuesday Bond The author states in this article states: Kids with Aspergers seem to evoke either the maternal or the predatory instinct in others. It seems my son runs into the predatory ones, this could be due to the type of classroom he was in, it was a SIED class and that was soooo predatory. Now he is in a classroom that is autism specific for his needs, we now are able to work on the skills suggested in this article.
12 hours ago · Like
Bethany Harty JUST what I needed to read tonight :) My 13 year old slightly autistic son got made when, in a bouncy castle, he and his 9 year old sister bumped each other, and she kicked him, and he proceeded to punch her in the arms. She has a MASSIVE bruise now on both arms. Sigh. He doesn't seem to understand why he got in such trouble. She hurt him, he hurt her back....
May 15, 2011 at 6:47 AM
Anonymous said…
Hi, Wow you just spelled out my life in a nutshell. My husband is most likely on the spectrum too and we are finding it very challenging working as a team to help out son. Has you psychologist giving you any suggestions. I am searching for some help for both Aspies in my family.
May 16, 2011 at 9:31 AM
Anonymous said…
My son is 14 and was diagnosed with Aspergers when he was about 9, he has become very irate and angry and has completely given up school,when he used to be a amazing student he is very verbally abusive to me daily and I just dont know how else to help him anymore,
May 16, 2011 at 8:08 PM
Anonymous said…
Dear Mark,
I subscribed to your site because of my 11 year old son. Long story and not sure how much you want to hear. Since my son was 4 or 5 my husband and I knew something was a little off. He was diagnosed as ADHD when he was 8 years old and his pediatricians said his behavior was due to the ADHD and him being "a boy". In the last 3 months his uniqueness seems to really be more noticeable. We don't know much about Aspbergers but wondering if the recent death of my mother, whom we lived with and took care of for the last 2 years, could have been to much stress on him. He has always hated school and getting him there is becoming more and more difficult. He is NOT an aggressive and is the sweetest kid ever. I could tell you so much more but again not sure how much you really want to know. We are trying very hard to get him officially diagnosed with Aspbergers but the wait for testing is quit long. I guess I'm asking for help with getting him socially close to par for his age, what can we do for him until the testing is over and what should we be doing for him during the summer.
Thank you for your time and the site!!!
Amy
May 17, 2011 at 11:36 AM
Anonymous said…
It’s really a nice and helpful piece of information. I’m glad that you shared this helpful info with us. Please keep us informed like this. Thanks for sharing.
May 21, 2011 at 7:22 AM
chai said…
I'm living with the same craziness everyday with my 12 and a half year old he has Aspergers has been on many different medications is gifted in math is social emotional problems at school is violent towards me living at home is almost intolerable you try and talk to them the conversation goes on and on and on he never will be quiet is explosive he's violent towards meI feel so hopeless I feel like the school doesn't understand his psychiatrist wants to keep prescribing different medications is with side effects it hurt his growth in and hurt him physicallysometimes I feel like there's no just know where to turn
March 25, 2013 at 8:19 AM
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