tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post3305500811264793066..comments2023-09-17T04:34:33.856-07:00Comments on My ASD Child: The Bullying of Aspergers ChildrenUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger39125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-42722360584186344802012-07-28T19:25:11.166-07:002012-07-28T19:25:11.166-07:00some one needs to teach the neurotypical comunity ...some one needs to teach the neurotypical comunity that bullying is a bad thing . The schools are terrible and by default actually promote bullies , and then when some severely bullied kid wants to goto school and shoot everyone who bullied him/her, ALL the NTs turn from bullies into victims ---amazing.. majority of NTs suck and so does bullying. FYI most wars are just a bigger form of bullying....again an NT institution.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-43040392917684608512012-06-19T06:20:52.956-07:002012-06-19T06:20:52.956-07:00Our son is being bullied and tormented at school, ...Our son is being bullied and tormented at school, and the school is punishing him for the resulting emotional outbursts. We have decided to keep him at home today, and until we find a school that understands Aspergers children. <br /><br />We are based in London, UK - and I'm hoping that this site is UK based, too. Please can someone point us in the right direction for searching out schools that really are good with Aspergers, rather than schools that pretend to be.<br /><br />At the moment he is at Primary school, but we will also need a suitable High school within a couple of years. His position on the spectrum is described as 'borderline,' so his present school really isn't even trying! <br /><br />Thanks.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-44414023134761117702012-02-28T02:00:56.001-08:002012-02-28T02:00:56.001-08:00I live in Albuquerque. Do you? My 9 year old daugh...I live in Albuquerque. Do you? My 9 year old daughter has <br />As and suffers greatly from bullying.Arlenehttp://www.ashiatsuabq.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-36622607633684093432012-02-23T14:15:07.656-08:002012-02-23T14:15:07.656-08:00On 12-08-2010, after many complaints to the school...On 12-08-2010, after many complaints to the school and bus garage, my son hung himself. Doctors said it didn't look good, but he lives, with brain damage. Pull your kids out of school to make it a point for them to do something. Because lack of knowledge of AS and yes, possibly lazy school staff, your kids are not safe, I learned the hardest way.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-24920626563629018862012-02-05T12:17:45.337-08:002012-02-05T12:17:45.337-08:00Ok some advice needed parents! My 10yr old Aspie s...Ok some advice needed parents! My 10yr old Aspie son has been bullied for the past 2 years. This year is much better, much less. I switched after school care for him for this very reason and this last month has been great until Friday. He was on the playground trying to defend a girl that 'Michael' was bullying/teasing. Was telling Michael to leave her alone...when Michael punched him three times, twice being in the face. Instead of going to tell the counselor (he didn't want to be called a tattle-tale), he went inside and sat in the corner alone, didn't want anyone to see him crying. (until I picked him up an hour later). Before we left, he told me what happened and I discretely called the counselor out and explained what happened. She's going to talk to Michael - here's my question. and feelings. I'm pissed, obviously. Yes, he should have let the counselor know but we all know what public school is like and how kids are, especially non-aspies. Kids are mean. Part of me wants to go in Monday and 'deal with it' and part of me wants him to learn and fight his battle, sort of. Do I 'let this this go'? It may cause more problems or not...anyone with experience would help. Thanks!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-48425116243203460992012-02-03T07:15:50.307-08:002012-02-03T07:15:50.307-08:00"I have had problem after problem with my son..."I have had problem after problem with my son's teaching assistant (he's 9yrs old with asperger's) and today at yet another meeting with his school, they produced copies of questions I had asked on here and other sites regarding how to deal with the way my son is being treated at school... they had been literally stalking websites, groups and pages that I was using... I am really freaked out that I am being stalked by a government educational institute... I have changed my name and picture on here because of this... but has anything like this happened to anyone else and if they did, how did they deal with it? Does anyone know where I stand legally? I said nothing mentioning anybody's names or even the name of the school... just the things that have been happening to my son... they showed it to me in a way that was attempting to use it against me..."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-38171054191591988732011-12-11T10:21:48.781-08:002011-12-11T10:21:48.781-08:00I need some advice...I just recently learned that ...I need some advice...I just recently learned that my12yo aspire son was being bullied by a child with serious behavior issues that in his class. He has been harrassing him for awhile. Doing stuff like taking his school supplies and picking on him. I just took it as kids just being kids. And I told him to tell his teacher. Then this week on Monday, I picked him up and said he had a bad headache. That evening when talking to him he said he never wanted to go back to that school. He said this child hit him in the groin abdomen and the back of his head in the boy's bathroom . Later that evening I called the Teacher and she told me that my child didn't tell her at first. Three other classmates told her. My son is an introvert. My son has told me that he wanted to did and that he hated school. He used to love school. They said the other child was suspended til January. When I went to the school and told them I didn't want my son back in the same class as this child they said their were restrictions b/c this child is being served with spec ed. My son was scared to go the following day. This has happened before in the boys bathroom one other time. It's not fair for my son to have to be moved and start a whole new schedule. It should be the other kid that gets moved. They told me if I take it to tribunal my son would have to get on a stand in front of the other child and say what happened. My son is scared. So he would be able to do that.I don't want this kid back in his class. But because there are only two spec ed teachers on. I'm the school it will be hard to take him out. What can I do to keep this kid out of my sons class? Please help!!!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-6387381729296133102011-12-02T08:08:35.122-08:002011-12-02T08:08:35.122-08:00If the teacher is actually bullying--ridiculing th...If the teacher is actually bullying--ridiculing the student I'd try and get a video or tape. That person shouldn't be teaching. Other things can be handled with iep's, 504, meetings and training.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-2773824779920677772011-12-02T08:08:19.014-08:002011-12-02T08:08:19.014-08:00I had the same problem last year with my 10 year o...I had the same problem last year with my 10 year old daughter. It was a miserable year. No matter what I did the problem was never solved. Hang in there and trust your gut! I am so sorry for both you and your child.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-19129358772921241302011-12-02T08:08:00.953-08:002011-12-02T08:08:00.953-08:00Love your comment about her being a mirror for beh...Love your comment about her being a mirror for behavior... we all can be, we tend to feed off peoples moods n feelings if we choose to.. these kids tend to more so because expressing THEMSELVES can be hard for them ... great point! :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-37369262833534815032011-12-02T08:07:32.534-08:002011-12-02T08:07:32.534-08:00My Aspie daughter has ALWAYS been a product of her...My Aspie daughter has ALWAYS been a product of her environment! If she feels threatened by a teacher, she will always give it right back to them, with no filter. She is a perfect mirror for that behavior. So with that said, I have to believe that there is something going on in your child's classroom. I, myself, have gone thru the "Ticked off" stage, the being "quiet about it" stage, then we when received a new principal during my daughters 5th grade year, I went through and am still continuing with what Parenting Aspergers Children - Support Group commented first about. Please follow that advise, I just can't stress that enough. I thought/felt that my only option left was to re-enroll and go to school with my daughter... which Thankfully I have not had to do, because I started following those guidelines. Trust me when I say I completely feel your stress like that of most of us in this group. But I can say that if I survived it, you can too! I have complete faith in you! You can do it!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-27721136050768287442011-12-02T08:07:01.528-08:002011-12-02T08:07:01.528-08:00I'm not sure how the other parents feel about ...I'm not sure how the other parents feel about it but I have always found that although my daughter is an 'Aspie' she has a pretty good instincts when it comes to aggressive tendencies towards her and she is not given to lying so I would be apt to trust her on this. That said you need to address it immediately with the teacher. Instead of accusations though you need to feel her out and see how she feels about your child and her ABILITY to teach him/her. The bullish behavior might stem from her own frustrations. Explain that ridicule or being singled out it a 'trigger' for your child's disorder. Remind them that your child has a neurological disorder and that their behavior is not a matter of displine and has to be dealt with using a different approach. Offer your advice as to what works at home or direct the teacher to a good resource for this information. If that does not do it get the school's administration involved. Don't let it go on longer than it needs to.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-8563267076174845502011-12-01T09:29:58.116-08:002011-12-01T09:29:58.116-08:00You also need to trust your child. Many kids feel ...You also need to trust your child. Many kids feel that they cannot trust so they hide. I learned that when you address a problem you don't ask, you TELL! You let this teacher know "My son/daughter is not comfortable with being ridiculed in front of his peers/classmates" that way you don't sound like you doubt your child's plea. I'm having butterflies in my stomach remembering how I felt, learning to advocate for my daughter b/c no one else will!!! I wish you the best :-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-65378208033523762762011-12-01T09:29:49.159-08:002011-12-01T09:29:49.159-08:00Our lil boy has Aspergers and his 2nd grade teache...Our lil boy has Aspergers and his 2nd grade teacher was the same way. She even told my wife she was afraid of him and that we should check him for knives before he leaves for school. Luckily the school Psychologist and the Principle stepped in and we were able to move him into a different school that had a teacher that has a class that has all children that are the same way as our lil boy in some way or another. She has been a blessing and he has been making great improvements. In our opinions if a teacher cant handle these special children they shouldnt be teaching.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-67040942488120029432011-12-01T09:29:36.638-08:002011-12-01T09:29:36.638-08:00I can't emphasize the need for aspies to have ...I can't emphasize the need for aspies to have an iep or 504 in place. It protects both sides as many of the things mentioned can be addressed in writing. As for pulling kids from gifted programs, you should find out if participation is dependent on grades and/or behavior. I agree that aspies need special parents and I'm willing to stand up for my kid any day. :). Good luck.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-26265060980797422192011-12-01T09:29:23.282-08:002011-12-01T09:29:23.282-08:00I agree with the first comment completely. I would...I agree with the first comment completely. I would suggest getting your child involved with an IEP or 504 plan. If you decide to follow-through with a IEP or 504 plan, it would allow special accomodations to further assist the child. You have the right, as a parent, to request an evaluation. The best way to go about getting an IEP/504 is to send a letter to the principal requesting a "comprehensive IEP evaluation." Also, it's imperative to train your teachers. Everyone needs to be on the same page. With one of my Aspie clients, we have an instructional sheet on meeting/engaging with him and a list of symptoms for new people he encounters (i.e. new doctors, teachers, etc).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-59164077991981049272011-12-01T09:29:12.130-08:002011-12-01T09:29:12.130-08:00I had the same problem with my daughters teacher! ...I had the same problem with my daughters teacher! Ridiculing and name calling. So sad. I would try to volunteer or send a digital recorder to school and stuff it in his bag. They have those 20 hour long recorder that college students use so they're very effective! I have resorted to this once in the classroom when I was volunteering and to my surprise they teacher never hanged her ways. So it helped a lot. So sad that it has to come down to things like this but I believe it's high time the schools start recording teaching either by sound or with video. Too much damage is being done to children and teachers are walking away Scott free. :-(Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-56933334001068566502011-12-01T09:10:09.042-08:002011-12-01T09:10:09.042-08:00It's my experience that even if the teachers b...It's my experience that even if the teachers behavior isn't intended to be taken that way, it COUNTS and is a valid complaint when your kid perceives it that way. Calls for correction... I had this happen with my kid and teacher destroyed his trust in all adults outside our home and hurt his love of learning something fierce.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-29996237629373143492011-12-01T09:09:46.861-08:002011-12-01T09:09:46.861-08:00Having someone observe the classroom can also be h...Having someone observe the classroom can also be helpful. Is this a teacher who uses sarcasm or teasing? Many kids with Asperger's have trouble recognizing when this is happening and can misinterpret things. There may need to be teacher education---as well as training your child (if this is happening and he is mis-interpreting it) Observation can help determine if the behavior your son is complaining about is used with everyone or just him. Is your child having trouble with the material in school? Every year it can get a little more challenging and require greater use of more abstract language, more executive function skills, etc. So, he may need different support this year than he has in the past. Has the teacher been given information about Asperger's? You are wise to listen to your son --- there is obviously something not right---but try to get a more rounded opinion to make sure the real issues are being addressed. Good luckAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-66784742053035342522011-12-01T09:09:30.185-08:002011-12-01T09:09:30.185-08:00I am also having a similar issue with my fourth-gr...I am also having a similar issue with my fourth-grader's teacher. He has been having severe meltdowns at school and home. She insists on eye contact and gets mad at him in front of the class for his disorganization and lack of focus. We have been fighting to get a 504 or IEP and finally have that meeting next week. Problem is, the teacher and principal both think he is a behavior problem and threatened to pull him out of the gifted program because of these things. He is working so hard, I don't know what I can do. We have met with the teac her several times but nothing ever seems to come out of it. I hope all of your situations get resolved well and soon. Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-66338407321962034482011-12-01T09:09:14.395-08:002011-12-01T09:09:14.395-08:00You have to remember not everyone 'gets' t...You have to remember not everyone 'gets' these kids the same way we do! I believe we we're chosen to parent these kids for a reason.. there is something ' special in US to be their parent! ♥Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-86107676466524843102011-12-01T09:08:57.798-08:002011-12-01T09:08:57.798-08:00I have just begun going through the exact same thi...I have just begun going through the exact same thing with my daughters math teacher<br />14 minutes ago · LikeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-38315590951546370832011-12-01T09:08:47.581-08:002011-12-01T09:08:47.581-08:00That is tough! My son had a teacher who was SO har...That is tough! My son had a teacher who was SO hard on him, expecting things from him that just weren't possible and making him feel TERRIBLE about himself. We eventually had him moved to a different class.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-57701048424577889902011-12-01T09:07:20.027-08:002011-12-01T09:07:20.027-08:00Parenting Aspergers Children - Support Group:
If ...Parenting Aspergers Children - Support Group:<br /><br />If you think there may be a problem between this teacher and your son, here's a plan of action:<br /><br />1. Gather the facts. Try to remain objective and open-minded. If there is a problem, don’t immediately assume that it is entirely the teacher's fault; it could be a problem with your child or the school. If your school or teacher will allow it, sit in and observe what goes on in the classroom. If parent observation is not permitted, talk with other parents to see if their children are having problems. Also talk with parents whose child had this teacher in past years to determine if there is an ongoing problem.<br /><br />2. Document the problems. Write down the times and dates of incidents of a teacher's inappropriate behavior. If other parents are noticing problems, ask them to do the same.<br /><br />3. Call or meet with the teacher. Schedule a face-to-face meeting if you feel a phone call won't resolve the problem.<br /><br />4. Approach the teacher as a professional and an ally. Avoid a confrontational attitude and stick to the facts. Try to stay clear of personal criticism. Focus on classroom practices, curriculum and what you feel your child needs. Once you have had a conversation with the teacher, give him the opportunity and a fair amount of time to improve the situation.<br /><br />5. Follow the school's policy. Your school should have a policy on teacher-parent disagreements. Ask what the policy is and follow it. Give this process time to work.<br /><br />6. Contact the principal. If you don't see any progress after a few weeks, take your concerns to the principal. But be aware that it is always better if you can resolve the problem without involving the principal. Once you involve the principal, you cross a line, and your relationship and your child's relationship with the teacher will be forever changed.<br /><br />7. Contact the district superintendent. If you still haven't resolved the problem after speaking with the principal, contact the district superintendent. Ask what the district's policy is on evaluating teachers and how teachers are assigned to schools in the district. Gather other parents with you who are concerned about the teacher. Realize that this process takes time and may not end in a quick solution, but there is hope if you are persistent in working with other parents and continue to voice your concerns.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1527055659904040434.post-57515786524970777242011-12-01T09:06:50.371-08:002011-12-01T09:06:50.371-08:00I have reason to believe that my Aspergers son’s t...I have reason to believe that my Aspergers son’s teacher is a bully. My son rarely complains about anything – but he has told me story after story of how she will ridicule and shame him in front of the other students. I don’t want to draw false conclusions or blame, but if this is going on, I’d like to know how to address it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com